it sounds like i'm making this up but, at my wedding, joe lunardi was personally giving me shit about this. "the only power conference school that has never won a game!" he's eating the food, he's drinking, he's laughing. "0-for-eight all time!"

i say we just run him at this point. totally ignore the constitution or whatever. can’t stop us if we don’t read it

perfect

dedicating my first post in five months to ao tanaka. i love you, ao tanaka

anyone wanna buy three phillies tickets for tonight.. (incentives: harper’s back, wheeler pitching, fireworks, you’d be doing me a big favor)

huge day for annoying people like me

*1 minute long close up of cavan sullivan on the sideline while the ball is in play* commentator: he’s exactly 15 years 8 months 6 hours 23 minutes and 42 seconds old, the youngest american professional soccer player to sit on the team benches built by the home depot

year after year, ben consistently gets me the best birthday presents

they could never make me hate you, patrick bamford

POV: you're a baseball and this is the last thing you see

NEW: Workers at The Union for Contemporary Art publicly announced their union and demanded voluntary recognition. On the same day, management egregiously fired five longtime staffers. Workers have filed a retaliation charge and are moving to an NLRB election. newsguild.org/a-supermajor...

got my first piece published with xray, and i could not be happier 🪶🐇🍽️

we have a fantastic story by Keely Curttright @plaintivecuckoo.bsky.social !! it's about a woman who is being stalked by a hawk while she makes dinner for her neighbors. this reads to me like one of those great, classic, 5,000 word New Yorker stories -- so good :) xraylitmag.com/hunting-gath...

day zero of starting a labor union at my workplace and i would appreciate signatures on this statement of support from all my bluesky friends bit.ly/m/unionunion

New short story in The End Magazine! I love writing and being alive!

thinking dangerous thoughts (hoping spurs get relegated and are forced to sell archie back to a promoted leeds)

got a story and a poem coming out this month 💚

my wife will be like “ooo what song is this it’s nice” and then mark kozelek’s voice comes in and she just starts laughing at me

vet tech let girlcat go in the trash can cabinet

a song for @sinigangwarrior.bsky.social soundcloud.com/d-soeuvr/cat...

i’ve said it before, and i’ll say it again: lorrie moore’s “self-help” is one of the only perfect short story collections

really sorry to hear that, man. for sure, i’ll let you know if i see a guy that looks like that

kraus was staring out the window for a solid minute before i spotted him.. if your cat sees something and you don’t, you’re wrong

splash zone

the philadelphia union have had a top-five team with a bottom-five payroll basically since MLS data has been available

absolutely heartbroken

married!

perfect mail day for keely

having the worst week of my life. phillies better win tonight

reminder that i am in fact stupid enough to do this

happy ninth birthday to my stepchildren

i am not often filled with rage, but every time i pass my neighbor’s house and their security cam system announces “hi, you are currently being recorded” i feel all of the fury that i did not even know was contained within me begin to rise up

goalie LP2 “THE ILIAD AND THE ODYSSEY AND THE GOALIE’S ANXIETY AT THE PENALTY KICK” out this spring

thank you for another year of hanging things on walls for me, watching the worst soccer league in the world with me, and waiting for me to finish breath of the wild <3

took ben’s cousin’s 7 year-old daughter to the movies today and she asked me if they “made movies with color or only black and white” when i was a kid

offered my younger brother a bluesky invite code, and he said “what’s that? is it like linkedin?”

birthday ben and baby bunny

we took a picture before and after telling her she was beautiful

as a woman and first-time homeowner, it is my responsibility to venture to the hardware store once a week and buy something that’s ever so slightly wrong (i.e. weed whacker twine that’s too thick, a light bulb with the wrong size base)