Pronouncing Antipope like Antigone

A foley artist will record this and use the sound for someone walking on gravel

[roxy music voice] 🎶Avignon…

So convoluted you’d think Kamala Harris came up with it

🙏

Which is Spanish for “the niño”

I’ve always wanted to be the very last guy jogging in from the bullpen, muttering goddammit as I pretend to get involved

Feels like a lot of catchers are getting hit in the nuts so far this season

I’ve seen enough: start Susac over Bailey for a few games.

One of my favorite Duane Kuiper quirks is how he always pronounces “foul” with two syllables.

This reminds me that I need finally play New Vegas all the way through

I hope it happens live on TV and it’s Joffrey Baratheon style, clawing at his throat, turning purple and begging for his mother

This Year by the Mountain Goats

We need to stop referring to them as MAGA, I fear that when it’s time to hold people accountable, they will take off their little hats and distance themselves from what is happening today. Republicans did this. They are Republicans. Republicans can stop this. Republicans are allowing it to happen.

“You’re deadnaming Ye when you call him Kanye West” lmao be fuckin serious for two seconds

It’s Ativan o’clock

Bari Weiss Attempts To Boost Ratings By Kidnapping Tony Dokoupil’s Mom https://theonion.com/bari-weiss-attempts-to-boost-ratings-by-kidnapping-tony-dokoupils-mom/

in persian culture, telling someone "we're going to kill you all" is considered deeply offensive

Today is a good day for posting more of our favorite tweets, or favorite 30 Rock or Simpsons or It’s Always Sunny joke.

Eyyyyy

The Phillies are required by law to have a damp bearded guy at all times

Recent experience with the Giants makes me wonder whether handsome mlb managers are less likely to win.

The masters… a tradition unlike any other? Pal, there are hundreds of country clubs that didn’t allow Black people until like 10 years ago

Oooh right on the taint

Dudes need to start using the skyhook again. If it was good enough for Kareem, it’s good enough for any of these young centers.

That one dude from Michigan is really tall

People haven’t made fun of Rob McElhenney nearly enough for changing his name to a description of what the hamburglar does

[chicago voice] Daaaaa moon

There is a path. It’s the path that Michael Vick walked. He has worked with the Humane Society for the last 17 years to educate folk about animal cruelty. He says he’ll do that work for the rest of his life. Call me when Louis or Kanye devotes even one weekend to making reparation.

Should’ve been called the Chicago Wind, because they blow

it's like they went back to each of the past 5 decades and took the worst features of every hairstyle. did boys consider that they're not getting laid bc they have tragic hair? the loneliness epidemic could be cured by barbers.

Every generation thinks the one that comes after them has stupid haircuts, but in this case I’m absolutely right. Broccoli hair and modern mullets look dumb as shit.

call me an op ed columnist circa April 2020 because I'm annoyed my kids are not in school today

Could really go for an ice cream sandwich right about now

73° in San Francisco feels *so different* than 73° in Portland

Bader needs to learn how to say “I got it” in Korean

BRO STEPHEN VOGT PUT IT AWAY YOU CANNOT JUST HAVE THAT OUT ON THE FIELD

it also has this one

I wonder how well the average baseball fan would do as home plate ump for an entire game

that dude may not be very good, just large

Is it hide and seek or hide and go seek

I would like to be teleported to the In-N-Out Burger

Good job Southampton. Well done.