This rules so hard

Lose Yourself (Acoustic Version)

Dare to Be Stupid. Made Mark Mothersbaugh furious because he felt it was better than any actual Devo song.

In modern pop culture it’s Beverly Hills. In terms of the essence of their sound it’s Buddy Holly.

This is @glutelord.bsky.social and he's completely fucking correct. The fundamental tension at the heart of all incel culture is that these guys HATE women and refuse to appeal to them but desperately want to get laid anyway, and this contradiction can only really be resolved through violence

Welcome to the Black Parade

TFW you’re named after a suburban housing development

@lizzyacker.bsky.social Lizzy I love your work but Sublime are not a ska band or a even really a punk band and definitely not a ska punk band

I feel like men will generally say brother’s wife while women will mostly say wife’s sister.

The G.O.A.T. in a given field/sport is not always the same as the B.O.A.T. Michael Jordan is and probably always will be the greatest but he’s not necessarily the best basketball player ever.

That’s a lot of airbrushing to make it look like she has a chin

Lmao 10/10 no notes

When I learned that Captain Stottlemeyer from Monk was Buffalo Bill I damn near fell out of my chair

Wrestling my biggest rival in a league dual meet. Ref called me pinned when my shoulder was up. I lost it. Threw my headgear at the ref, got ejected from the building, quit the team for that year.

Times are tough. Gonna have to start selling Lularoe so I can afford my cronuts.

This is certainly the direct words of the erudite and knowledgeable Rob Schneider, and not something he had ChatGPT do for him.

For the first time in my career as a reasonable accommodation coordinator, a Kaiser doctor provided a detailed and easily understandable note on the first time of asking.

“I was shopping for my wife Bonnie, I buy most of her clothes..”

They should rename sunroofs to rainroofs because that’s when they’re the coolest

Here it is, your moment of zen.

Not sure exactly how many blue words have to show up in a Wikipedia article before I click on one of them, but it’s less than five

If it happens in the middle of that UFC event they damn well better finish the card. He’s not more important than Owen Hart.

Unless somebody falls, I have no idea what the difference is between very good and excellent figure skating

This Mount St. Helens 25th anniversary hat is just a Shane McMahon outfit accessory. I will not be taking questions about my wrestling knowledge at this time. ebay.us/m/u61hKf

I was chatting with a French guy at the bar the other day and he mentioned his girlfriend and then about 10 minutes later just casually mentioned his wife and kids

Any of my SF pals happen to know a cool preferably female guitar teacher who is good with kids? Haven’t been able to find a good one for my kid since we moved back.

Macklemore, Mackleless, Macclesfield

The Roadrunner’s Great Meep Forward resulted in the death of 1/3 of the coyote population

My homies are only the kind of people who reflexively repeat it in falsetto when they hear someone say “in the year 2000“

Q tips

A 21st century Virtual Boy

Uludağ gets a big thumbs up from ya boy Rick

Star Wars land was one of the biggest disappointments I’ve experienced at Disneyland. Oooh there’s some stormtroopers walking around harassing people. Big whoop. Who fuckin cares

Doing just fine

The best way to watch NASCAR is to turn it on when there’s only about a half hour left in the race

Going nearly 200 miles an hour a few feet from another car also going nearly 200 miles an hour a few feet from another car going 200 miles an hour, etc. seems really sketchy

Doing my skate routine to Get On Your Feet by Gloria Estefan

U S and A!

Cake Pop Demon Hunters

Cake Pop Demon Hunters

Dryer lint traps are always *always* designed to give maximum dust and maximum frustration

Decided to try to learn how to play no children on the piano even though I don’t know how to play the piano and then I learned that it’s in 6/8 time so yeah I’m just not gonna try that

we used to be a proper country where having nazi shit meant you killed one, not that you were one

That's weird, she just told me that she didn't even race today.

but now who will protect us from nothing

Sometimes though you really do gotta do a little dance and then you drink a little water

I consider squids loud