"How dare they use evil propaganda to put me off my stroke, when I'm balls-deep raping this girl at knifepoint..!"

#Everton have nothing to lose against Spurs - they can throw everything (+ the kitchen sink) at them and win 5-0 or lose 5-0 and nobody would hold it against them. Or they can spend the day on the beach, and instantly become everybody's hate side for next season. C'mon #Toffees, you know your job.

Hot as it was, a few hours spent on this baby this morning was a real delight - even if we didn't have any wind to propel us. #Morgenster #TallShip

'Boro keeper just fumbled £100million. #PlayOffFinal

"Second Best"? "Second Scam" more like. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

www.maptap.gg May 23 100🎯 99🎯 99🎯 100🎯 91😁 Final score: 970 High score.

Anyone else getting this permanently taking up the top-right of their MacBook Pro screen and can't get rid of it for love nor money (nor swearing)?

Rd 1 = 36 (two years out) Rd 2 - 33 (one year out and Scissor Sisters) Three Alvins: My Coo-Ca-Choo, Jealous Mind, Red Dress #popmaster

Meanwhile, what a lovely day - I have staked out my peonies, for the record. No, no, PEONIES!

Post with the cover art of David Bowie's "Let's Dance" and the comment: "Name another song that mentions the word 'Dance'. I'll wait." Yeah, well you'll wait a fucking long time matey, 'cos I've blocked you.

Liverpool: "An outrage to leave out Trent! But right to leave out Foden, Maguire and Palmer" Utd: "An outrage to leave out Maguire! But right to leave out Foden, Trent and Palmer" City: "An outrage to leave out Foden! But right to leave out Trent, Maguire and Palmer" Chelsea fans: "An outrage.." etc

Here's the deal on #Maguire. Hasn't scored for England since 2021 (25 games), only managed 4 goals for United in the last two seasons. With his goal-threat largely gone, he has to be considered purely on his defensive abilities - and they've been on the decline for years. Why the surprise?

Taylor Harwood-Bellis on the goggles celebration. "....had I known the severity of the situation, I would never have done what I did... In the moment, it was meant as a bit of fun in a situation that we as players were not informed about." I think the word you're looking for is "sorry", matey.

The reality after the local elections, not the bias situation spun by the news media.

#Treehouse down?

Promised You a Miracle, Waterfront, Ghostdancing #popmaster

OK Graham, don't milk it mate! #popmaster

33 points - one year out and didn't get Billie Myers. #popmaster

#Ofcom must address perceptions it's been complacent and slow about EVERYTHING - in particular the unbalanced and biased BBC coverage in politics, and the existence of GB News as a mouthpiece peddling lies and falsehoods for the benefit of one particular political party. I'm not hopeful.

Congratulations to the Villa and Unai Emery, the King of the Conference League. #AVFC Just #Palace and #Arsenal to go, and we get to keep Europe . . . or something.

Appeal dismissed. #Southampton aht! It would bring a tear to a glass eye! 😆

BBC's second top story at 6 o'clock was the Chancellor getting heckled by some shouty twat. Not even news. Let alone top news. Into the actual item, mentioned almost in passing, the fact gov't has frozen fuel duty. It is impossible to deny the bias. You have to REALLY not want to see it.

Just another day for our Israeli allies.

It's mid-afternoon, three days before the play-off final. Nobody knows who's playing, teams can't prepare, fans are clueless, transport and hotel rooms are booked, lawyers are in a darkened room. Let's be clear - THIS IS ALSO SOUTHAMPTON'S FAULT. Another reason the expulsion should stand.

Rd 1 = 36 (forgot Beyonce) Rd 2 = 36 (didn't know Shane Ward) Got both years!! Bombed out on Steps - and proud of it! 😆 #popmaster

Uh-oh! #popmaster

Another thought on the #Southampton spying issue. The New England Patriots' 'spygate' affair was nearly 20 years ago. However, they STILL carry the burden of being called cheats. No matter how this week plays out, a similar stench is going to follow Southampton around for many years to come.

I rarely click on any videos, but I'm watching this on endless loop and laughing my tits off.

My sister sent me a #Wowcher gift email yesterday morning. Since then, I have received 23 'promotional' emails from them. That's nearly one an hour. Do they really believe that'll make me want to use them? Are they that fucking stupid?

Just texted my Arsenal-supporting mate effectively saying Chelsea have this in the bag, and Spurs score.

Never forget, Cameron's Tories brought Brexit because Farage's UKIP was taking a bite out of Tory polling. Without a care, Cameron & Cabinet bet the nation for Tory Party benefit; to the absolute disastrous detriment of the nation.

WELL NOW!!! #BOUvMCI

The Arse approximately 10 minutes away from the title.

Well now, part two! #CHEvTOT

Of course, if this does get 'tasty', the absolute worst man to be on the whistle is Stuart Attwell. Unless you're a neutral and want to see an out-of-control clog and card-fest, with a terrified referee. In which case, Attwell's perfect! #CHEvTOT

Pretty bored now with all the Southampton/Man City whataboutery. It's really not the hot take thousands of you think it is - especially as everyone seems to forget that they key outcome is 'Boro getting the justice they deserve.

To be fair, both Spurs and Chelsea are playing this like it matters, so far. #CHEvTOT

Well now! #BOUvMCI

Southampton fans looking for a refund

I know the tension is huge, and there's tons at stake, but Arsenal aren't exactly playing like Champions. But I doubt if a single one of their fans will give a flying one - as long as sitting on a 1-0 doesn't come back to bite them on the, ahem, arse. #ARSvBUR

Half-time player interviews? What fresh hell is this? Fuck off #Sky #ARSvBUR

Cry Havertz for Arsenal and St George and all that . . . #ARSvBUR

Little change in terms of base colours - except for Aberdeen. According to Wikipedia: "In March 1939, Aberdeen changed the black and gold colours to red and white, reflecting the silver and red colours of the official City of Aberdeen arms."

Important thread, required reading.

#Burnham says he thinks #Brexit has been damaging but is not proposing that the UK rejoins the EU. Well fuck him then.

The COMPLAINERS !

For those who intend to watch the World Cup, two of England's group games are on ITV, so we won't be troubling the tournament organisers too long.

First time doing #popmaster for some time. 36 and 30 (both years wrong, and the Mai Tai question). And ALL the ELO songs 😆

I wrote about ugly duckling songs: quantick.substack.com/p/undeleted-...

Working class Wolverhampton boy of Indian heritage becomes the first Englishman to win the #PGA Championship since 1919. In your face, Tommy fucking Robinson.