Keep texting me Democrats, I'm reloading.

It's okay to misunderstand something and respond aggressively cus you were mad. It's not okay to say that you're allowed to do that and you were correct to respond that way.

I'm going to France soon to finally confront Stereolab.

(Otis Redding voice) Pain at the puuuuump

On Trans Day of Visibility. Kagan and Sotomayor concurring!

Top 5 places I've been in terms of how America (value-neutral) they are: 1. Cincinnati 2. Worcester 3. New York City 4. Phoenix 5. Six Flags Great Adventure in Jackson Township, New Jersey

Appreciating Goodfellas but not really fuckin with it is pure Kael. She fuckin owned.

This shit sucks!!

youtube suggests this video to me every day and every day i watch it

I guess boycotting Harry Potter feels pretty trivial to me, because I'm an adult. if someone told me I shouldn't eat Gerber's baby food, I'd be like, that is no problem. I'm way ahead of you

The older I get the more I understanding joining a cult or going into the woods or developing an all-consuming opiate addiction. I'm not gonna do any of those things but consciousness is essentially a massive pain in the ass.

Brady could make plays in the NFL yes but I’m pretty sure he would split in two if he got sacked at this point.

I’m hanging out 👍

I will NEVER install an update.

Jungle is massive mate innit www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSXL...

The computer is too slow. It needs more megabytes.

Peter Kelly Mindset

DHL is short for Da Hole Letter cus that's what they deliver.

This display name is very good

Takin a nice shower top 20 things to do while alive.

The clusters of teens at the gym got me feelin r/childfree

I generally like BC but every year I am reminded of how profoundly and passionately I hate their entire audience.

Esoteric Peter

There absolutely is rampant sexism among liberals and it is almost exclusively coming from center-left men and directed at lefty women under 40.

I think a lot of people are convinced we have another Fetterman in Platner, forgetting that Fetterman is clearly suffering from severe brain damage.

We're currently in the "Paris Hilton showing a picture of a cartoon ape to Jimmy Fallon" stage of the AI bubble.

In Maine we also call it aluminium.

Here's your moment of zen: A "holy" cat named Coco stands at the entrance of a church in Mexico, seemingly blessing everyone who walks in 🐱

tempted by the fruittadanudda

Unrelated but nostalgia for your 20s is loser mindset. 30s rock. You know yourself better and you have more money. It is easier to afford expensive meals and drugs. You are still physically able and probably hotter than you were at 25.

There's a whole lexicon for guys who spend all day every day reading tweets and substacks. They love the word 'bellicose' for example.

There's a very real market for this. You can do insanely well building an audience as a liberal who engages in psychotic personal attacks on young women and queers of the left.

Baseball vampire

Here’s how I rank the monsters: 1. Dracula 2. Wolfman 3. Mummy 4. Creature from the black lagoon 5. Frankenstein I’m just not impressed with Frankenstein.

“Yo! Let’s get cozy!” - The Cozy Homeboy

Do you think a sprightly young lad with spunk and gumption could ever court a lovely starlet?

I love Lumo and I'm gonna be so mad if they change him (her? it?) in any way.

ppl sit around all day talking about how they would make the perfect social media platform like they're in second grade designing their dream mansion. how do mutes work? whats the discovery feature like? do i put the waterslide in my bedroom?

BIRDS/HOTDUCK.GIF

I actually think the lesson is that these checks and balances only work when backed up by personal liability and legal consequences for individuals who seek to undermine our rules. You can't have a democracy if you allow anti-democratic forces to walk free.

Really enjoying how many people rushed to make the exact same joke as me. We're all this stupid.

First still from Martin Scorceses new film has just dropped

*bruce voice* every homer’s got a hungry bart every homer’s got a hungry bart

The dentist said my teeth look great not like you even care...

I hate Shams Charania with my life.