For some reason I’m watching HALLOWEEN H20 in February. Each time I see it I hate the movie just a little bit more. Dull as dishwater, lazy, and a production no one outside of Curtis seemed to want to be a part of.

The rightwing response to the murder of Alex Pretti is predictable: to outshout and talk over anyone taking another position. The shrillness on Twitter is especially grating, but again, not surprising. It's Orwell's doublespeak. If the man had a cell phone instead of a gun, yell louder.

It was literally founded on rebellion. Against tyranny. This isn’t hard.

These people have become completely desensitized to lying. It’s their go-to nature.

Trying to imagine any reality where I’m excited about a movie for babies like HE-MAN.

This babbling idiot is not well.

“There are lofty goals to be found within Sleepwalker, but unfortunately, the film is ultimately DOA due to a poor script, uninspired direction, and a complete lack of scares.” @brandonct.bsky.social has our review:

AVATAR: FIRE & ASH: Mostly a retread of WAY OF WATER only with a great performance from Oona Chaplin that ultimately isn’t serviced by the script.

For all of my readers out there, you need to get on the latest Joe Hill novel ASAP. What a devilishly fun ride.

After watching Kino’s recent release of SCARS OF DRACULA, I’m convinced we need all of the classic Hammer films on 4K stat.

Grown ass adults will non-ironically tell you one of their favorite movies is SHREK.

EYES WIDE SHUT fucking rules. A great take on ego, sexual fantasy and anxiety, and the uncertainty around not truly knowing who anyone really is - even those closest to you.

Every single one of those country music superstars that fill stadiums look like they went to prom in their twenties.

Sydney Sweeney is indeed very attractive but we have boobs at home.

“When the film gets down and dirty – it does so with gusto and never forgets that there are characters experiencing the horror around them." Our @brandonct.bsky.social reviews Pig Hill, streaming this weekend:

A film called JINGLE BELL HEIST is supposedly the #1 movie on Netflix right now just in case you needed more evidence that it’s the CBS of streaming services.

THIS x1000.

The judgiest part of me in 2025 is very much “There’s not a chance in hell I’m watching something called K-POP DEMON HUNTER.”

On the scale of things that smell awful, weed is one small rung below the toxic sludge known as sauerkraut.

thinking about this disguise George C. Scott dons in Hardcore and cracking up

It's 1987. PREDATOR and THE RUNNING MAN are in theaters. It's 2025. PREDATOR and THE RUNNING MAN are in theaters.

I’ve long thought Trump is good at picking fights that benefit him politically but the fact he’s fighting right now to starve Americans is making me reassess

The perfect metaphor for the MAHA agenda

Still reeling from how dull and lifeless the last two MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE films are. As much as I love ROGUE NATION and FALLOUT, McQuarrie should’ve sat these two out. This franchise thrived on new directorial blood.

Tonight is beggar’s night in Columbus and it’s pouring rain and cold. Instead of passing out candy, I’m doing the next best thing: sitting at a bar.

PTA has - what - like four masterpieces under his belt now, huh?

Spent nearly six hours hiking this morning. My feet may never be the same.

If 43 year-old Brandon could go back in time and tell 16 year-old Brandon that he’d now be really into country, folk, and blues music, that younger version of myself would probably jump in front of a moving train.

“Folktales doesn’t strive to stir up unnecessary drama or strife in its subjects. Instead, the film revels in the beauty found all around us as we try to recapture happiness, catharsis, and confidence.” @brandonct.bsky.social has our review:

Until tonight I thought I had outgrown the “get so drunk at a show that I want a pizza afterwards” phase of my life. Oh well.

Pretty sure I’m going to be tasting the salmon I had at lunch for the rest of my life.

Folks, I’m shocked - shocked I say! - to hear that HAPPY GILMORE 2 is atrocious. Comedy sequels are always bad. And Sandler’s comedies have been awful for decades now.

Just tried going to two different locations for lunch that are well known establishments. For some reason they don’t open until late afternoon/early evening. Is Columbus even a real city?

I don’t know if it’s any better that instead of binge drinking when I get depressed, I buy random shit off of the internet 🤷🏻‍♂️

Lost our 20 year old cat this evening. Roary was fiercely independent yet the sweetest cat ever. She will be missed.

Man, the opening of SCREAM 6 almost hints at a series entry that might defy the formula. This is a franchise absolutely terrified of doing anything different. Huge bummer as I can remember how refreshing the original was when it opened in 1996.

“Shari & Lamb Chop still soars thanks to a steady filmmaking hand and the engrossing life of the film’s titular focus.” @brandonct.bsky.social has our review:

Entering that stage of my 40s where my first few thoughts upon waking up range from, “Shit… did I lock the front door last night?”, “What day is it?”, “I didn’t have to get up at all during the night to pee. Nice”. Either way, the circling of the drain has begun.

Despite what the trades and click-baity websites tell you, the major studios aren’t going to save the movies and/or theaters. They will continue to produce nothing but IP garbage that devalues cinema and alienates more people than it attracts.

Sometimes I feel like I should toot my own horn a lot more but then my midwestern sensibilities are like, “Ope! That’s uncomfortable!”

SORCERER > WAGES OF FEAR. Sorry folks, I don’t make the rules.

Quote with a movie sequel that really hits. The Raid 2

Summer at the library is often like a real life adaptation of LORD OF THE FLIES without the beach.

It’s only June 7th, and like a true mid-westerner I’ve already sweated through two hats that now need a thorough cleaning and that magic touch that allows them to keep their shape.

I think calling a movie “slow” has eclipsed “plot holes” as my least favorite bit of lazy movie criticism.

Even as a visitor, I completely understand why New Yorkers loathe Times Square. So disgustingly gaudy.

I cannot mage giving one iota of shit about that new HARRY POTTER series. In an era of blatant corporate IP reliance, this might be one of the least subtle and pathetic.

Honestly, I think what has made both seasons of ANDOR great is that Tony Gilroy doesn’t really give a shit about STAR WARS.

So we are at the point now where ICE is the American version of the SS right?