UK bluesky, I need your help: the first time i tried to solve a cryptic crossword, i got this clue and i've never been more confused in my life. 2 years later, i've solved many cryptic crosswords but it still befuddles me completely. someone plz explain how "HAHA" solves "trench dug, ya boo sucks"

gay motley crue be like: boys boys boys

"You didn't get a very good night's sleep." maybe that's because i didn't sleep. but thank you smartwatch, for your cutting-edge insights.

is there a worse online feeling than having to sign in to one of the credit bureaus???

I only just found out you can add “-ai” to a google search to omit that stupid AI summary at the top of the results, making Google slightly less unusable

does anyone know this guy's name? i would like to cyberbully him directly.

For my nephew's 12th birthday I got him an mp3 player and I'm loading it up with a bunch of cool uncle stuff. Some artists i'm like "ehh, idk if a 12 year old would dig this" but then other bands are such no brainers: - The Clash - Daft Punk - blink 182

You can pry my negative self talk out of my dumb bitch hands

I realize that “thanks for fucking up my heavy metal weekend, Trump!” sounds stupid but this kind of shit is how you sway fence-sitters in your real life to anticapitalism. Just quoting Das Kapital at people doesn’t do anything but demonstrate that you’re a nerd.

i wanna be at the rnc i wanna be like dan scavino

apologies to my neighbors. i had a beer and caught sight of my guitar out of the corner of my eye

ask not what jeeves can do for you. ask what you didn't and couldn't do for jeeves.

i hate to break it to ya but i don't think i've watch 15 shows

does someone have video of bill maher delivering a funny joke? i guess what i'm asking is, has that ever happened?

failing a background check because they noticed my "#OpenToTwerk" badge on my linkedin profile

i was just assassinated in the group chat

an wilhelm scream

institutionalized gambling is the most brazen transfer of wealth from the poor to the rich ever created gambling with your friends? one of life's greatest vices

We should normalize celebrating the date you decided to quit using Amazon the way people annually mark their sobriety

can gen z please start a second band please? i'm sick of talking about Geese. (they rock tho)

"cortisol" is the new "dopamine" (a word people say a lot and have no idea what it means)

and how's that working out for you?

stop interviewing clavicle and sneako and other such weirdos start interviewing their parents i want to know the conditions from which these little freaks spring forth

"Someone tried to strangle Sneako", "Clavicular just had a drug overdose", I refuse to believe that understanding any of these headlines is better for me than chain-smoking

well shit. reuters has been my main source of mainstream news for years. no more. any recs for a daily, big global and national news story email newsletter?

me: *fighting for my life, coughing up the nastiest stuff imaginable* microsoft teams: Your microphone is currently muted! Press Shift+M to unmute.

this is what true love looks like. if your girlfriend doesn't ask wtf you're talking about every now and then does she even love you

I have some bad news about the military ma’am

oh my god drop.com (formerly Massdrop) has yet again completely decimated their business. Massdrop was so good. It had such a variety: raw denim, coffee supplies, headphones, pocket knives. Then they rebranded to Drop. They limited their selection to just mechanical keyboards, and "audiophile"

"Despite it all, I still believe in the unassailable goodness of humanity. I also believe that the Easter Bunny is a real, tangible creature capable of wielding magic and producing plastic eggs filled with individually wrapped candies."

Very pumped to have a new McSweeney up! Remember: If you experience an Easter Bunny sighting this weekend, please text me asap. I think I know how to trap it. @mcsweeneys.net

if your login form says "username" but you actually need a full email address to sign in, i wish for 1,000 years of plagues on your lineage

since it's going to come out in the trial, i might as well get ahead of it now: i pooped in the turnstile pit.

project managers when you didn't correctly estimate 2 weeks worth of work exactly to the hour

proud to announce that i am directing a sequel to Project Hail Mary starring John Stamos Project Have Mercyyyyy

the fact that a 2 dollar difference in the price of gas sways people's political opinions more than anything else tells you the extreme stupidity this country is capable of

oh great, now i want in even MORE

the truth about egg

nirvana the band the show the movie THE ohio state university

Kim Gordon has clearly found the fountain of musical youth and i think i know what it is. quick- someone bring me Nardwuar handcuffed and ballgagged

the only draft i support is a freaking draft beer brother

my band's new song and video came out today! Our new LP 'Psychedelic Munitions' is out May 22nd on Fat Wreck Chords.

Wolf (1994) has Jack Nocholson going full Jack but as a werewolf. Truly needs to be seen to be believed. I cackled throughout the whole thing.

progressive penis music

to r/micropenis—Just Saw An Edward (guy with normal penis size) Fuck Up Trying To Flatten A Cardboard Box By The Dumpster...They Are So Lost

guys literally only want two things and it's fucking disgusting

apparently men are now walking into salons and saying "please make me look like sex icon Groucho Marx"

have we tried letting Andy Cohen moderate peace discussions in the middle east?

a lot of the news in the past week has been insurmountably distressing, so let me add to it: a footlong tuna at subway now costs $20 apparently