“the president was loudly booed in the countrys most populous city we traveled to this small town in south dakota to find out why”

anyway, one more time: did you throw garbage at the green goblin from the 59th st bridge? no? Then you are not a New Yorker.

Vanilla Ice has had a long, hard road out of hell, but he has redeemed himself admirably.

Gosling gobbling The babies are having a wee salad. #BirdOfTheDay #FoodInBeaks #ECK #EastCoastKin #PhotographersUnited #Photography #birds #cute #OM-3 #ArtYear

“The new James Bond game doesn’t have enough kissing hot girls and his boss is DEI,” I say to my microwave as a frozen dinner turns in slow circles, each rotation another sliver taken away from my soul

Arrow (2012) is a show that finally answers the most important question, “what if Jack Reacher was a 300 hour long melodrama?”

And just for fun, the greatest F:NV meme of all time

I know absolutely nothing about the man except he is very fucking good at the part of the job that actually works.

“Pope warns of robot apocalypse. Markets rally upon rumors the host of Celebrity Apprentice will surrender to Iran. British government vows to prioritize toilet security…” Shut up. Please just shut the fuck up. I hate the news.

jizz , more like jorzz

have to keep saying (despite the many angry posts this generated last time): it's a world-historical problem how funny this guy is

Was forced to listen to contemporary country radio today. Every single song is just this: “Lick boots & drink whiskey My woman respects the patriarchy I can’t go to the inner city God bless the USA”

This could be the only account on this entire app and I don’t think I’d notice a difference.

It's a huge blow for democracy & the rule of law It's a huge blow for democracy & the rule of law It's a huge blow for democracy & the rule of law It's a huge blow for democracy & the rule of law It's a huge blow for democracy & the rule of law It's a huge blow for democracy & the rule of law It's a

BREAKING: Epstein Suicide Note Unsealed

I just forgot the funny thing i was gonna tweet fuuuck k this is bworse than stepping on my balls

At times like these it’s fun to remember he, technically, has his finger in the button.

you do not tax billionaires to fund universal healthcare. you, yes you the person reading this, and everyone you know, pay more in taxes to fund universal healthcare. you tax billionaires to take away a gun that Elon Musk is pointing at your head.

And they need to have wheels, if they’re going to be a wagon.

Holy crap, guys. His approval rating is down 300%.

There have been sex machines and there have been SEX MACHINES, and there has been the kind of harmonious love making engine that shook the heavens and rocked the earth in accordance with the hallowed choir of angelic voices! And dick. RIP King 👑

trump’s most consistent feature going back to the 2016 campaign is rape as a generalized worldview.

“destroying things shouldn’t be considered radical” thanks Tyler Durden can you fking people even hear yourselves?

*to the tune of rocketman* soccermom making sure you live your life alone and i think its gonna be a long long time till AI makes a girl thats really mine shes not the mom i think she is at all oh no shes a soccermom

liberals have been talking about this since 1981

some people will tel you gender is 100% biology, then go to the doctor and buy a plastic ass

The debate in the 80s wasn’t pregnant teenagers vs. no pregnant teenagers, It was “do we stop teen pregnancy with contraceptive or abstinence?” Stopping teen pregnancy had a 100% buy in! “What this country needs is more knocked up middle schoolers” they would have Freddy Krugered your ass.

WE CANNOT ALLOW A RACE COMMUNISM GAP

“You want HOW MUCH for a kid?!”

we are ten fucking years into this shit and the only political theory that has ever mattered that entire time is "orange man bad"

Iran, if you’re listening: Kill twitter and America will surrender. I work in the White House and know this for a facts.

The mind is its own place, and in it self Can make a Heav'n of Hell, or a Hell of Heav'n

The encroachment of middle names into proper names is a fucking abomination,,, and it is time we started fighting back!

the moon is cool as hell

really, it's irresponsible not to put nuclear missiles on the moon and give control of them to AI

Are the nukes he’s waving around in the room with us right now, David, you colossal idiot?

@mhmoodsfmly66.myatproto.social fuck you!

They told you articles of impeachment get drawn up in the House, and Chris serves in the Senate, Josh you absolute penis. “Waaaahhhh, somebody pointed out correct information to me!!!”

It looks like we’re finally getting an answer to this.

you, a naive fool: i do believe there are some things the nytimes won’t both sides the nytimes:

People say shit like this and never consider the second-order effects of shitting on Democrats. We elected people who think war crimes are good!

your reward for making a good movie is that you're forced to make worse versions of it forever

Many people are saying this. Smart people.

great speech sir

Usually the bull in the china shop doesn’t yell at all the other customers to grab a broom

God speed to Mr Victor Glover and the rest of the Artemis II crew!