Trump: "He's a dumb person! D-U-M. Not the B. Most people don't know it has a B."

paging Jeff Young

Last night I dreamt that I was arguing with some white trash about spanking and I said “I don’t need to hear the opinions of a hillbilly.” [I am white trash and my dad was a hillbilly.]

For decades, the IRS has been required to audit every sitting president annually; a critical safeguard to ensure no president has a secret financial stake in betting against the American people they swore to serve. Every president accepted those audits without question. - Until now.

I’m 7 hours behind on everything but my guess is he’s getting an infusion this weekend

We have *never* before seen consumer sentiment this low.

Gus (belongs to a patient to whom I do home visits. I haven’t been here in 6 months so he’s leery; ordinarily I can pick him up)

Imagine being so proud of this sandwich, that you fight in the state legislature to make it your states sandwich.

Guy ahead of me at Jack-in-the-box asks them “How many tacos can I get for $10?”. Answer: 10.

It's rare that news about the guy makes me laugh out loud. The detail about him attending a UFC fight at a golf tournament was icing on the cake. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...

These 8 Democrats voted to pass a national ban on trans teachers and mention of LGBTQ topics. Rep Henry Cuellar (TX) Rep. Don Davis (NC) Rep. Cleo Fields (LA) Rep. Laura Gillen (NY) Rep. Vicente González (TX) Rep. Marcy Kaptur (OH) Rep. Marie Gluesenkamp Perez (WA) Rep. Eugene Vindman (VA)

For two years, Mike Johnson refused to hang the plaque on the wall honoring police officers who defended the Capitol on J6 against a mob of violent rioters, even though a law was passed to mandate it. But he supports paying over a billion dollars to the criminal rioters.

Early Dungeons & Dragons #dungeonsanddragons

Introduce yourself with 10 bands/musicians you've seen live: Foreigner The Police Elvis Costello (multiple) Steely Dan TMBG Squeeze Peter Tosh REM (Reckoning) The Who John Prine

Bob Dylan a decade ago. He and band were at the back of the stage and never seemed to be aware of an audience. I had paid $205.

‼️🚨 BREAKING: Kash Patel's apparel website is reportedly hosting ClickFix malware, according to multiple visitors. A fake Cloudflare verification page is tricking users into pasting "verification" commands that execute an infostealer targeting Keychain, browser data, tokens, and crypto wallets.

Epstein

Beverly Hills Cop is the best action comedy of all time (yes I love Shane Black, but there's not an inch of fat on BHC) and Bronson Pinchot somehow upstaged Eddie Fucking Murphy for a solid 5 minutes on screen. Not an easy feat.

Trying to increase my intake of fiber. Good sources of fiber include: ferns rope shells Dr Pepper cartons light bulb filaments FPGAs Hall & Oates

ACAA* my latest for @newscientist.com *a cartoon about abbreviations

Spurs are a sure thing with the big Frenchman (Boris Diaw)

Spurs are a sure thing with the big Frenchman (Boris Diaw)

It's World Bee Day! 🐝 This little Mason bee (genus Osmia) demonstrates exceptional strength & fortitude in removing a nail from a brick wall. Mason bees are solitary: the females make nests from mud or, in this case, masonry walls. So, our narrator should say: "good lass." (📷: MrDowner1306, YT)

nice chonky banana slug on the trail

wildly optimistic

You can permanently disable AI search by putting this in your search engine options and making it the default.

you can still add -ai to your query and you won’t get an AI response

There are five wizards who arrived in M.E. about 1000 years before LOTR. Two aren’t named in LOTR but a later essay says one went east, one went south and were never heard from. (This info is in Unfinished Tales.)

manbearpig

Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice & Grogu

Listen I read a lot, and a lot of it is dull as hell, and I’ll tell you one thing I’ve learned: tedious writing is almost always a product of the writer conveying, rather than discovering. When a writer is discovering, or sharing discovery, no editor on earth can scrub out the vividity & joy.

man wonder what kind of stuff inspired the attack on the san diego islamic center

“Felidae, Carnivora, Mammalia, Chordata, Animalia.” - Society for Informing Animals of Their Taxonomic Positions

jfc

Filled out my ballot and will drop it off this afternoon. Mainly I wanted to vote FOR the library levy.

Same energy:

nailed it

Since becoming an international celebrity, I’m always pulling that gaffe where I try to hide behind a magazine that has my picture on the cover

The first picture on my phone is of Joy (2003-22) our precious tuxedo cat. She liked to get under the blanket with me if I slept late on a winter morning. When we returned from trips she would yell at us until she lost her voice.

Spurs win on penalty kicks

CIS PEOPLE TIME TO STEP UP it’s once again time to yell at our bad government via online comment form the FCC is trying to make trans and nonbinary content require special ratings on shows GLAAD has a good writeup on it below TELL ‘EM NO direct link to comment form: www.fcc.gov/ecfs/filings...

Still hungry. They should make a sandwich that’s, like, two sandwiches.

these hands appear normal for their age

why does he love giving gifts to pedophiles? who can ever truly know what moves the heart of a man

Just remembered there’s another season of 3 Body Problem in the pipeline

Hold on guys, I think I understand why everything’s going wrong: “Wisdom And Knowledge Shall Be The Stability Of Thy Times.”

I’m at the gym lifting weights. There are always HS boys in groups of 2-3. This old axiom applies: “One boy is worth half a man Two boys are worth half a boy Three boys are no help at all.”