Daaaaad…I want tummies!!!!

I think…I think I just saw a commercial for women to buy their own speculum kits to bring to their gynecologist?

@feralstreeep.bsky.social your son has been giving out my email address again…

The volume of political texts I’ve been getting this year is absolutely fucking absurd.

WTF is this, and why don’t I have it?

Absolutely not, ResMed.

Introduce yourself with 10 bands you’ve seen live Madonna Janet Jackson St. Vincent U2 Alanis Morissette Joan Jett Sarah McLaughlin Tove Lo Robyn Scissor Sisters Kylie Minogue Jessie Ware I felt like naming 12 thbbpt

Christian should replace Probst.

Oh dear. Survivor spoilers from the east coast. See y’all tomorrow.

Quote with a fictional band that is not Spinal Tap.

It took me an anxiety-ridden hour to pick out this frame.

Quentin Tarantino’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas

Whoever invented deadlifts should be deadlifted to death.

I wasn’t gonna go to happy hour today but now I need happy hour today

If I had hair, this morning would have made me tear it all out.

Anxiety attack in 3…2…1…

I need to take a shower, but my dog has taken me hostage.

I was just havin a li’l snuggle sesh with my dog, and I said, “Do you know how much I love you?” She put her paw on my arm and then smooshed her face into mine, and now I am dead. 🥹🥰

Heidi Klum out here lookin like the ookie cookie…

MLEM.

How I know TRT is working? I am absolutely fucking feral.

Anxious enchilada

We’re goin 4” inseam from now on.

They’re very concerned about the neighborhood.

See a birb, post a birb

Just when I thought Tramell Tillman couldn’t get any sexier, I find out he can sing and

The alt text for this emoji made me giggle

Slept like shit last night. And all my dreams were of me sleeping like shit with alarms constantly going off.

I resisted the urge to be an absolute petty bitch when someone Teamsed me with a question I answered in the email he referenced please clap

I’m at a doctor’s appointment, and my temperature is 95.4 (taken twice to be sure), so I guess I’m dead.

Y’know what? Still thinkin’ about Wednesday evening, and it’s making me feral af.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

My favorite thing about Couchella is when they pan to audience members who don’t actually know the words.

Weekend Mode: Activated

CA bloomfs - who do we want for governor now? The primary is a-comin, and I’m still too new to the state to feel educated enough!

thinking about ann reinking in all that jazz 🌟

I HATE COACH SO MUCH #Survivor50

OMG the guy installing our water filter is so fucking hot 🥵

Care to join me in the Haunted Hot Tub?

Samsung sent me an email giving me ideas for spending my tax refund.

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I didn’t know I needed a disco dinosaur until now.

I’m sorry but Zane Phillips’ armpits have made me a religious man.

cum inside your friends✨🌈

if you see this, i implore you to post a picture from whatever device you're using with no explanation

My absurdly hot doctor is leaving the practice and being replaced by another hot doctor. Time to schedule a prostate check…

They’re the same picture.

I wanna know who greenlit the Probst Rap so I can yeet them I to the sun

I did much better than I expected! What's My JND? 0.0087 Can you beat it?

KP - Look at the huge log I did, babe! JT - Wow, that’s impressive… so wide, babe