Feeling fancy* *But not that fancy because those are paper napkins and plastic cutlery

Good morning and Merry Christmas everyone 🩷🩷🩷 Time to get up and wash my hair and then potter around for a few hours.

Do they think Santa controls the weather???? Like even if you are a firm Santa believer nobody is thinking he's in charge of the weather.

[me telling my story how I survived a plane crash and lived on a deserted island for a year] it was crazy [friend who once got a text from me where I accidentally called the grinch the grink] was the grink there?

I LOVE when people who still use the phrase “chatrooms” try to tell me the internet is wrong about something

Me to the youths: do you need the stockings in the lounge or can Santa fill them in the bedroom? Dylan: I don't want Santa sneaking around our bedroom Me: we've got that chair there for him All the youths: aaarrgghhhhh Me: 😂😂😂😂

Movie has been watched, popcorn has been eaten, the traditional Christmas Eve presents have been opened.

Somehow my Christmas Eve movie suggestion won and we are watching The Mummy 😂😂

Ohhhhhhh I hear a tūī ....

Once again my bosses gave me cash for Christmas and this is just one of many reasons why they're the best.

I am home. Not working again until Sunday 👍

Also I have reached my dressing for the season at work final form - sparkly antlers with pigtails.

Customers: are those all the Christmas cards you have? Me: sorry yes those are all we have LEFT NOW Making it very clear it's their own fault for leaving it until the last minute 😁

Walking "into" 2026

Today this man came back into the shop, bought a pen, and apologised to me. It's a Christmas miracle.

Remember you can make Christmas your own. You can choose not to hang out with relatives you don't like, you can have sandwiches, you can decorate with skulls, you can do whatever makes you happy, even if that's ignoring the whole thing and just binging your favourite shows all day.

Honestly one of the best decisions we've made is switching to fancy sandwiches for Christmas lunch. No last minute cooking. No hot oven on. Just yummy food. Plus you skip straight to the best part - sandwiches 😁 We also have desserts of course.

Me to Moriarty who was lying in the middle of the bed: okay I'm just going to do the washing and I'll be back in a couple of minutes. Came back and he'd stolen my spot.

Got many things that need doing today but Moriarty thinks we should watch TV and snooze.

Today I have discovered that McDs does an iced chai and it's really good.

As an old person the one thing the young ones say a lot that gets to me is "not gonna lie ...." Like, good, I should hope not. But I also let it go because I still say "like" all the time as is the way of the 90s teenager.

“The last-minute christmas rush at the bookshop.” - my latest cartoon for @theguardian.com books

I SCREAMED www.instagram.com/reel/DSaex-X...

So most customers are lovely and today we had one who had the most amazing jewellery and it turns out they make it themselves and then we all nerded out about sea urchins together. 5 stars. Would customer service with them again.

I am home. I have a day off tomorrow and then 2 short days.

1 hour until we close the doors. There's basically no customers anyway.

Today I am working 8.45 - 7.15. Hopefully no shitty customers today.

I'm watching performances from Woodstock 99 and I feel very old. Also did you know that Fred Durst has been married 4 times?

I'm tempted to try and sew myself a new dress to wear on my birthday but I may actually not have the time or energy to do it.

People are always like "unexplained noises" and I'm like, that's a ghost. There you go. Explained.

Me: *Buys great present for @melbailey.bsky.social's upcoming birthday* Also Me: *Forgets what time @melbailey.bsky.social finishes work and leaves it near the front door*

We have many annoying customers but we don't normally get aggressive customers. Nothing physical but after he left (was going to come back later when my boss was there) I let security know about it. We saw him coming back and my boss was like "okay off you go Mel, out the back door".

Just had a guy pushing my "didn't stab anyone today" pin to its limits.

Girl lunch

And the Mothman Museum

Look at this delight!!!

Also today at work a teenager went "there's a skull in your Christmas tree" and I was like "yeah there's a bat on the other side too. I put them there" and then I told her and her mum about my Christmas aesthetic and maybe one teenager now thinks I'm cool.

My mum has sent me a birthday present. They went into a second hand/antiques store and explained to the owner that I like kinda weird creepy things and the (little old lady) owner was like "so do I!" and she didn't have anything in the shop but went and got a few things from her own collection ...

I'm opening the store tomorrow and Sunday so need to be at work at 8.45. Me to my boss today: I can't believe you're making me get up in the middle of the night

You should all know that every time someone I know pushes or pulls when they should have gone the other way I say "you alright there, school for the gifted??"

Maybe if I sigh heavily enough it will produce enough force to propel me through this day

My cramps are cramping so everyone better be nice to me today. I'm also wearing my "didn't stab anyone today" pin but I'm willing to remove it if I have to.

My response to anything over the next two weeks

Me pouring 7up from a 1.5L bottle into (cleaned) used 600ml Sprite bottles:

I heard there was a secret meat With paprika, and spicy heat But you don't really care for sausage Nduja ...sorry, I can delete this. I've just seen a few posts in this format and I wanted in.

My brain around Christmas time: 🎵 baby Jesus, born to rock 🎵 youtu.be/pobD7yEXqrg?...