The AntifaCorp™️ shareholders are not going to love this

I think I'm at a point in my life where I can confidently say that I never need to hear another piece of news about Starbucks ever again

When an episode of 15 Minutes of Fascism (with @cajohnson-craig.bsky.social) is 16.5 minutes long

Yeah, we need to fight this tide. Everyone, delete one app that you haven't used in over a month from your phone right now

7PM Eatern

Look, Pt. 1 by Agriculture

As someone who often has to go through email for a living, it is absolutely fucking wild what people are willing to put into writing and send out

If I tell you what I think about this video my account will instantly get nuked to the fucking moon

To those laughing about Trump getting stuck on an escalator, maybe read a history book? Escalator ambush was actually a common technique among communist groups during the Cold War primarily intended to make a guy a little late for something

The temperatures have been more bearable the last few weeks, but with the increase in sweeps and pressure from police, demand is as high as ever.

A to scale map of Six Flags St. Louis

Question for my followers who don't live in the U.S.: Surely you have heard all about how bad our health insurance is. Are you aware that it covers neither vision or dental care?

Wait, the escalator just stopped? That's it?

i will never ‘Finish setting up my phone’

If you have your blinker on because you want to merge, I leave enough space for you to pull a truck hauling wind turbine parts in there, and you simply refuse to get over, well, buddy, you have made an enemy for life

I really wish that was true

"An escalator cannot break; it can only become a fatal funnel."

Boy, I have never been more correct in my life

Anybody need anything from Schuyler?

Just got the double jab, so you can come cough on me, spit in my mouth, whatever, I'll be fine

De-ICEr was right there

I am eating less! Not in an effort to lose weight! But because I cannot afford as much food!

We could have created any world we wanted, as wonderful a life as could be imagined, and this is what we chose

The whole thread is important, but this, in particular

(Chanting) 901, 901

FC Köln because they're the greatest club in the world Union Omaha because it's my hometown club Tigres because, as a mutual on twitter once told me, "Tigres fans are born, not made" Manchester United because I hate myself and love to suffer

Never should have gotten out of bed

Folks, I'm gonna do it

I would like to say that today is the stupidest day of work that I can imagine, but I do have to work again tomorrow, so

Jesus making it up to us for missing rapture day again

Let's goooooooo

Me when Taco Bell takes the chili cheese burrito away again:

It scarred my kid forever when the old Toys R Us became a big-ass liquor store, but maybe this can help him heal

Mel rules, hire Mel

Chat, is that bad?

Wow, I got raptured. It's pretty chill up here. St. Peter told me the Heaven version of bluesky automatically filters out both the "bluesky is dying" and "bluesky is ruining society" takes, so that's pretty cool. Alright, have a good one, gonna go play Leslie Nielsen in table tennis.

God, it's gonna be so great when they do this to her on their next tour

New Star Wars trailer, I'm logging out for 6 months

These dudes are gonna keep fucking with the big pharmaceutical companies' money until they 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 fall out of a 15th story window

Mutual aid rules

I don't know if I have ever mentioned this, but I really hate family law cases

Ok great that Kimmel was brought back, but can you all do this for places harming LGBTQ and Black/brown lives too?

First day of fall and I have eaten zero bowls of chili with cinnamon rolls today. Whole damn season is ruined.

Man, if a bunch of people canceling subscriptions and vacations can make a tv network cave and bring a show back, I wonder what else we could accomplish if we all worked together 🤔🤔🤔

Wow, i wonder how that's gonna go

Ok, before the rapture, I have to get something off my chest. I've never seen The Big Lebowski, so I've never understood any of the jokes or references you've made, and I don't really want to. Ah, that feels better