squerv: pretty, pretty, pretty good

the only way to make money on NFTs

Some of you are one or two posts away from weepily calling TSA agents heroes, not me though

I’m constantly saying this

i guess the guy reacher KO'd is a british guy who displays a MAGA hat? i think this one's a wrap.

I don’t usually care about my kids hearing explicit lyrics, but I left my music playing on random at my desk in the basement with 6 and 8 down there and almost fell down the stairs rushing down to skip when I heard Half on a Sack start up

love to get a Facebook friend request from a parent of a kid on my tee ball team and it’s just wall to wall unhinged religious posts

this guy did the thing that happens in every single episode of Reacher and it played out exactly how it does in the show

every website is taking advice from this one extremely stupid guy

(after being beaten in cornhole by quadruple amputee) well you’ve won this round but at least I can sleep easy knowing you’d ever never be able to murder me

going to the bud bandit to get my weed stolen

Coke freestyle machine STUNS in leaked nude photo

signing the office greeting card and handing it directly back to the person who gave it to me 😏

someone brought in homemade cheddar jalapeno sourdough bread, i'm gonna eat a thousand slices

There’s nothing better to facilitate an afternoon nap than some dumb history channel bullshit

workshopping a new discourse that I’m tentatively calling “everyone who wasn’t born between 1980 and 1985 is literally hitler”

man I’ve seen the way you run, your brain is going to be absolutely excuse ridden

the sports understander has logged on

Discard into my mouth you mean

So the price of pool chlorine is just never going to come back down again? It’s been 6 years since Covid/that chemical plant fire

INSPIRING! The Mueller She Wrote lady has agreed to accompany Bob into the afterlife!

Mind Enterprises was like a private equity minimum viable product that they could charge $27 for

ideal pre-show bathroom

I'm losing it at this delivery robot getting absolutely smoked by the Brightline train in Florida 🤖🚅

🥵🥵

napping up in preparation for a DJ type event tonight, @dijcrap.bsky.social take notes

Mind Enterprises in brooklyn tonight

Mamdani chooses uber-capitalists Biggie, Nas and Jay-Z among his five favorite rappers. Is it a pivot to center?

Hassane Diallo is 6’8, and he is absolutely towered over.

yahoo this desperation is sad

that’s showbiz, playboy

gonna tell my kids this was Angine de Poitrine

I’ve been laughing about this for 3 straight days, my wife and I keep telling each other to get the hell out of here with your knob

RIP chick norris, a real piece of shit who people fondly remember because of some cringey internet jokes from 2004

This guy is quickly climbing the ranks of “people I would very much like to see ______, possibly with a ____ but really in any manner actuall”

googoo dolls iris voice

The Kennedy center board of trustees look like theyre about to give Dick Tracy a real hard time…

2027: your request to the capitol for a 1500 calorie per day ration is rejected in a letter that opens with "dear fuckwit" and ends with the signature of U.S. Deputy Secretary of Health and Human Services Jared Fogle

Yeah sex is great but have you ever told your kid you’re going to throw away any toys you find laying on the floor in the middle of the room and then you actually throw away any toys you find laying on the floor in the middle of the room?

If only there was some kind of sign that this could be coming. A nickname perhaps

Ok very impressive to be sure, now can I get a couple plates to do my squats or

going to win the tournament survivor pool i enter every year by sheer force of will and excel skills

Seeing the loudest and most obnoxious voter ID perverts in my town’s Facebook group getting outraged at NJ requiring licenses for e-bikes as too much of a burden for teenagers and parents

lmao

its incredibly clear when someone has not actually tried to follow sports on Bluesky, the official sports app™️

if there's anything you as an individual can do to improve this it's to post as much as possible in the most deranged manner possible about every niche interest that passes through your brain. everything else is on the bluesky dev team to figure out

Big iced tea matchup on Friday