Vecna: a super-powered byproduct of science meddling with cosmic energy beyond understanding, bent on crashing two planets into each other as a result of a misguided vision for a better world. Sephiroth:

Sitting in my tower of knowledge, absorbing the wisdom of the world.

Due to climate change, these Christmas takes are coming in hot

You can use a QR code like a crucifix to scare away old people.

As much as I've been a goofy fuck about promoting I Will Kill Your Imaginary Friend for $200, the genuine reception it's getting is incredible. Especially with people totally unfamiliar with my work. Here's an early review thread, starting with the incredible starred feature in Publisher's Weekly.

Travel tip: If you’re visiting a city and want non-tourist suggestions, ask someone who used to live there what they miss most about it. Bonus points if that person isn’t legally allowed back in the city but they’d be willing to risk it all for one or two of their suggestions.

My list of the worst TV shows of all time are The Wire, Breaking Bad and The Sopranos because if they’re so good where are the Fortnite collabs

The first Bayformers is insane. Sam: You have to hide! Prime: On Cybertron, hide means to fart on one’s own balls, which Jazz will now demonstrate using what you humans know as black culture. Jazz, show this earth neighborhood a racist fart.

Maybe being an adult means quit being a passive aggressive little bitch and minding your own business

Buddy can’t cook and thinks everyone just tolerates dryness. Like the time Ben Shapiro’s wife assured him it was not normal for women to have WAP.

New video available on YT. Enjoy the supernatural body horror of TURBO-TEEN, the boy-car fueled by human blood.

Patrons! Get an early look at the body horror shenanigans of Turbo Teen. He has has such sights to show you.

The only thing a zombie apocalypse would give us is dipshits like this who would downplay the zombie threat and then put their own friends and family in danger by lying about getting bit.

New patreon post to get your motors purring.

Today’s the day. We activate Auralnaut Singular

We always talk about big dick energy, but not enough about weird dick energy. Sometimes you see an action that is so inexplicably evil, you can only think “I bet that guy has an exceptionally weird dick”.

What a surprisingly delightful AI generated summary of my latest video. Even though computers are incapable of smell, it can still appreciate an entirely odor based bit.

Got a Halloween video for you on Youtube. I tackle the most underrated sense in all of horror: smell.

Happy Halloween, everyone. Here's some seasonal appropriate nonsense from ya boy.

The earliest memory I have of thinking “Wow, I am watching something TRULY cursed.”

Got some new channel banner art today courtesy of @mvbramley.art

One of the most TRUE signs I have ever seen at a march. Write this down and act upon it, friends. #NoKings #Manhattan

New Patreon post talking about some future plans. Get hyped!

Selling Black Phone’s child predator in the Fortnite store is a wild choice, but not as wild as including his kid snatchin’ Van.

A body horror film but it’s a man’s eyebrows and nose hairs taking over his entire head as he ages.

New YouTube channel is official. Give it a sub it you want more stuff like this

Screw it, let's get this party started.

This looks like someone tried jumping the train tracks with a flux capacitor powered dirt-bike.

One of my favorite movie series also happens to be a spiral of increasingly insane karate stakes.

My war crime: just wanting to make silly little videos while still being able to afford to fix my teeth and also wanting the same for others. I must be stopped at all costs.

Working on a new project. Stay tuned.

Bad news. The rapture did actually happen and if you’re reading this, you’re a piece of fucking shit.

Our family car growing up was the Ford Pinto model that was recalled for being a self destruct button on wheels, and realizing how little my life meant in the name of saving a buck is probably where a lot of my jokes come from.

Me listening to Borderlands 4 quest givers doing unskippable peepee and poopoo material when all I want is XP and new guns.

One of the best thing I ever wrote was about Robert Redford’s nipples. Rest in peace, king.

Also patiently waiting for @jasonkpargin.bsky.social to make a TikTok explaining what a groyper is so my search engine stays pure and my algorithm can keep being nothing but my own pornographic preferences.

Patiently waiting for all the “YOU’RE PLAYING THIS GAME THAT CAME OUT 12 HOURS AGO WRONG” Borderlands guides so I don’t feel like a dumb fucking idiot for not min-maxing my hobby

Okay everyone, quiet down. Let’s try this a different way. Show of hands, who here is actually SAD about this?

Huh, in the end he actually leaned left ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

As your resident parody content creator and also mixed martial arts fan, it’s my job to inform you this is not, I repeat NOT parody.

Colorado pollen has been trying to kill me since I moved here and I can’t help but think about the Prometheus scientists who thought it was safe to take their helmets off just because the air was technically breathable.

Bald guy privilege is being able to laugh at Dean Koontz’ fucking monster of a wig right to his face while the rest of you have to pretend it looks totally natural.

I’ve been alive long enough to recognize a legendary item location when I see one.

The things I do to watch a UFC PPV. I swear Buffalo Wild Wings are breaded in saw dust. Got my guts feeing like a wood chipper.

This movie was absolutely bonkers, but I had a great time talking about it with @auralnauts.bsky.social!

Another awesome episode of the @vhuspodcast.bsky.social

Ain’t I a stinka’

This trailer is a lot of fun until you realize it only ends one way. With the Red Ranger on his knees yelling “What have I done?!” after his mini gun style turned both friends and foes into red mist.

I once again bring a bunch of music that fucks too hard to win a contest of silliness

What are some fun accounts you follow here? I joined this site motivated by political outrage, and most of the accounts I follow are a reflection of that. Shit is depressing! I’m in desperate need of some variety.