Jesus and Viktor scoring in the same match is so cool. Arsenal should do that more in future matches. I am a brilliant soccer tactician.

hello 911? yes it's an emergency. i'm feeling relaxed while watching an arsenal match. please help

Arsenal have a striker?? Who scores goals?????

Stephen Miller Reminds Picky-Eater Son That There Starving Kids In Basement https://theonion.com/stephen-miller-reminds-picky-eater-son-that-there-starving-kids-in-basement/

Get all your sloppy shit out of your system tonight Arsenal. Cuz we fuck or walk from here on out

“ICE isn’t the Gestapo. The Gestapo was…” (proceeds to describe qualities that apply to what ICE is currently doing)

Same. Took that FSU, Florida Notre Dame, Ohio State ass and made it to the natty. Future looks bright. Feeling alright. I’m also high but these facts def help

Proud of them boys. Refused to die all season. Made football matter in this town again. Get Carson Beck all the way out of my life forever

Good start to the drive of the season, fellas. Good shit

Golden Boy President of the Jesus Christ Fan Club is throwing ducks to Mr. Fantastic and getting all the credit lol

Malachi Toney scored a pretty spectacular touchdown and the entire segment back from the break was Mendoza comebacks

Been asking for a whole lot from this defense all night. But here we are again. Asking for a whole lot.

Malachi Toney, I remind you, is a freshman

GABOS

WE HAVE A GOLDEN BOY TOO, FUCKERS @espn

Just waiting to do something stupid

Scott got held but they weren’t gonna deny Golden Boy President of the Jesus Christ Fan Club’s moment

Throw em up

Let’s go ya googley-eyed fuck!

Offense is straight up killing us

All over our receiver. No flags. Sourpuss Cignetti gonna point that out too or nah

This was me! Also, got teary eyed after that story about Fletcher’s relationship with his late father. #DAD

FLETCH ALL UP IN YOU!!!!!!!!!

The difference in this game so far has been that horseshit pass interference call and Mario going with a kicker that is 0-EVERYTHING in the playoffs over going for it in the red zone. Annoying.

THEY CALL ME MISTER BAINE

Stupid. All year long with these stupid penalties.

Halftime update: the wife has caught me up on all the Beckham wedding family drama and all I gotta say is I told all y’all mf David Beckham is and has always been a shady weirdo pos. Nobody listens smh

Cignetti: 😐 ESPN announcers: lmao lmao lol even

Insurmountable 10 point lead.

Knew they would score after we took that time out

Both defenses have been handsy and physical but the difference is Miami isn’t allowed to be

i’m over here praying like fernando mendoza

Nobody has anything to say about IU’s DBs all over the WRs but the second the golden calf takes a hit all the sanctimonious twats come out.

Dawson back in his fucking bullshit

He squared up like he was about to block. Fair play. But now that everyone’s made a federal case about it, next time he gets sacked will be punished by immediate execution by firing squad on the spot

Made Mendoza bleed his own blood

Is the ESPN audio screwy or have my shrooms kicked in early?

Didn’t run Fletcher enough on that drive* *every play

Over/under when he tries to steal the championship trophy?

Welcome to the big football game but first… three and half hours of jerking off America!!!!!!! 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

I forget which coach it was @chrisjoseph13.bsky.social used to say looked like he was watching a horse fucking his wife back on the ole FinsNation site but yea same kinda look

Oh hey the dolphins got a new head coach to fire in 4 seasons

The Bears thing has been cool but this is nice

Caleb is great but also maddening. Yikes man.

Underrated Tom Hanks gem. Fuck off NBC/Peacock

Enough time for one last Stroud pick

Help us Jarrett Stidham. You’re our only hope

super great to have boston fans back in our lives just the best so cool