Yappy hew hear!

Processing my pre–NYE party social anxiety by taking a covid test for no reason.

In 2025, I: - went from not exercising at all to completing 110 Peloton rides - helped get Zohran elected - edited a national bestseller www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/771172...

A "big tent" can accommodate random Trump voters who change their minds and switch sides. Marjorie Taylor Green would need to spend the rest of her life making daily public apologies and never holding a position of power ever again just to be allowed to look at the tent.

"it's in our DNA to do things that are absolutely not in our DNA" is so stupid it goes all the way around and loops back to stupid again

Tfw you believe in eugenics but not, like, for yourself

I dragged him to fulfill my winter fantasy of ice skating and then it turned out he actually knows how to ice skate.

We are pioneering new and dystopic ways of cutting off our nose to spite our face.

If you can't tell the difference between cilantro and parsley at a glance, don't worry. Neither can the restaurant that made the banh mi I'm eating.

Wow, no way, thank God there was an AI-generated notification to let me know

My husband just casually informed me that a song he played on like 10 years ago "got placed in a Netflix show that's apparently doing numbers, it's called Heated Rivalry?"

Now seated for Tim Tam Ping Pong

The first thing ICE did when it was created was raiding meat processing plants in the Midwest and south to help quell labor disputes over safety violations and keep those who weren't detained from getting legal protections as many had kids who grew up locally and were citizens with political power.

Crispy Chipmas and a snacky New Year, from your friends at the Frito-Lay Corporation!

Saw some little girl ask an adult man what his name was, he told her and then politely asked her name, she replied "I don't have to tell you my name. And YOUR name is little, little, little BABY." Owned

("Die Hard is a Christmas movie" voice) Good King Wenceslas is a St. Stephen's Day carol.

Making real eggnog for the first time, but I'm really bad at cooking and I think odds are about 50/50 that I scramble it.

And Tiny Sim, who DID die

In retrospect the Bush-era War On Christmas stuff seems more ominous than it did at the time. It was just cable news guys crying about dumb/fake shit, then and now; I mean the campaign to turn Christmas, which most everyone likes and feels warmly about, into just another thing to get mad about.

And Tiny Sim, who DID die

It's not so much that I like Christmas music, it's more that I like periodically hearing songs that I've known all the words to since I was a child.

If ADHD is a fake diagnosis that was made up in the past few years, then explain Uncle Billy from It's a Wonderful Life.

Yes, I will be at church tonight, but not because I've re-converted to Christianity, just because my husband works at a church now, but not because he's converted to Christianity, just because life is very ironic sometimes.

I'd never heard of Kat Rosenfield, so I looked her up. She writes for Bari Weiss's website. But yes, it's everyone else who's biased in this situation.

Some of you have forgotten that only three years ago you were perfectly capable of writing a text, writing an email, telling a bedtime story to a child, and it should worry you that powerful companies have convinced us we can’t do things we’ve been doing since the dawn of time.

I hate thinking about people in the future studying this era in history and not being able to actually rely on contemporary coverage by the NYT, WashPo, CBS, etc, etc.

As we all know, college is not where you go to read, learn, or think. It's where you go to blog your opinions before social events.

I know I'm getting older because the way my younger coworkers use the "!" react on Teams is confusing and scary to me.

The full spiked 60 Minutes CECOT package, clean & subtitled. 1/5

Don't these people ever get bored of conspiracy theories??

People who call kids “bad” usually don’t know Fact One about child development. A lot—A LOT—of adults, despite their authority, want children to display more emotional maturity than they’ve ever modeled for them.

Still thinking about the line "We'd love something new to read" from the last Pluribus episode. With the hivemind, everything has been read but nothing new can be written. Talk about a ChatGPT metaphor.

every story about this person reads the same she made a career claiming media was lazy & politically biased, having no clue how journalism works or the rigor involved in reporting. now in charge, she assumes she can easily produce her own lazy, politically biased work, but keeps running into walls

Jesus fucking Christ!

Some of these redactions are almost like modern art

When I see a comment that's like "See, nothing's wrong with my attention span, I just need something interesting" on a 90-second TikTok...

We have to stop the Pluribus aliens from spreading the woke mind virus.

Just watched Elf for the first time since high school, and James Caan has a job in children's publishing where he has to both pitch book ideas to the board and proof pages.

Squidward window dot gif

Funny, when they thought the reason was "we need to be more racist and transphobic," they wouldn't shut up about it.

These are the people the mainstream media is constantly telling us to understand and sympathize with.

this is the unspoken but absolutely clear argument at hand.

I do fear that the people in charge of the country need to be able to do fifth-grade math in order for the country to continue functioning.

This is obscene. Why can't other politicians say that? The 25 richest families are collectively $358.7 billion richer than a year ago, with a combined fortune totaling $2.9 trillion.

Dear God, if you can give me one single commute where someone isn't watching a video without headphones, I'll start believing in you again.

MY 4-YEAR OLD: *calmly, while coloring a picture of the Grinch* If baby grinches die, we can eat them. If they’re clean. That’s ok

For generations people “cut off” parents by moving away and mailing them a card once a year. Travel and long distance phone calls were expensive; distance effectively cut people off w/o being so explicit. The difference now is that communication is cheap so cutting them off requires being explicit.

There's no hard data, so it's impossible to know for sure, but I suspect the number of adult children cutting off their parents isn't significantly higher than it used to be, and what's actually new is that the children are now explaining it in therapy terms rather than simply ceasing contact.

When he was a lad, he ate four dozen eggs every morning to help him get large. What else would you possibly need to know.