"What if we taught men to get laid leftistly" what if men cared about the loss of our bodily autonomy, the abuse we face as a result of coerced economic dependence and the actual pandemic of femicidal violence we have to contend with, more than they cared about sexual access to our bodies

Human rights, or cishet men’s prospects of sexual access to women? 🤔 Who can say which society should be in outrage over!

If you look closely you’ll notice that the Venn diagram of straight men who think left spaces should help them get laid and straight men who think leftists talk too much about sexual assault and patriarchy is nearly a perfect circle.

This is not a “men getting laid” problem. It is a “men not thinking women are valid except as fuckholes” problem.

the left-liberal advice for men on dating is “treat women like humans our culture pretends that’s not only the best advice but that it’s anti-advice, demonizing our poor little boys bc it doesn’t offer schemes to control women men don’t want advice, they want to be bolstered in their misogyny

Women are seen to exist in a kind of perpetual emotional and moral debt, owing care, attention, sexual access, or empathy to men who are not seen to owe this back to women in equal quantities.

The sense that women have excessive moral obligations to men—to care for their feelings, to defer to their interests—but can legitimately make only minor claims in such care from others is central to how misogyny actually perpetrates itself as an ideology.

That they overturned Roe and immediately the media started a nationwide moral panic over “male loneliness” has got to be one of the least subtle moments in the long history of antifeminist backlash.

Women are genuinely in an emergency, and the obsessive focus on men’s wounded sense of gendered entitlement—they’re not getting laid enough!—adds insult to these injuries, because it suggests that people like it that way.

“We must find a leftist way to commodify women and enforce men’s entitlement to sexual access to their bodies.”

"Rolling abortion back to the states" means the rights and power of women depend on which state they're in - something that doesn't apply to men. THAT was why the right was willing to fail forward for 50 years, and why they're aiming at birth control next.

Women’s right to autonomy, economic & social freedom, and participation in the public sphere is actually more valid & worthy of protection than men’s desire for sexual/romantic access to women! Men should not need guaranteed sexual/romantic access to women in order to not hate us!

The rest of us don’t even have the option of creating mass movements of hatred (especially directed towards the white/male oppressor class). For example, women who choose to decenter men because of rampant misogyny are frequently equated to incels, when incels are violent & hateful!

Always a great sign of your own unseriousness and evil to point out the ways that women are hurt because they are women; never all that objectionable that the misogynist violence or indignity actually happens in the first place.

The misogyny is a feature, not a bug; a selling point, not a symptom. The Trump/Musk/Project 2025 agenda is one that would explicitly restrict women’s participation in the public sphere, & the backlash to the minuscule steps women have made towards equality is such that that goal is POPULAR.

I believe that women are systematically oppressed as women by men.

Love to get accused of misandry (and transphobia!) for saying that feminism should not center men as victims of patriarchy there’s no hope for women there’s no hope for women

Women spend our entire lives living under oppression and violence. And on the off chance that a violent, rapist man is punished, we’re told to feel *sorry* because some conniving bitch ruined his life.

Men & boys oppress women & girls day in and out in every facet of life and yet we’re expected to ensure that our feminist outreach includes them and that they are centered as victims under patriarchy. Men’s feelings are apparently too fragile to watch women advocate for their own liberation.

Let’s be honest: they think even one woman in Congress or a state house is too many, let alone there existing a woman-owned Australian skincare company where the Gen Z owner can film dancing TikToks No women in the public sphere!

The constant silencing of women & trans people, coupled with the amplification of concerns for men, serves only to recenter men as the “true victims” of culture & reaffirm their relative importance compared to everyone else. It’s insidious & it’s all part of the same plan.

If we ever get out of this, the fact that men and boys were cast by the media as victims in a time when women’s advances and rights were being deliberately erased will strike some historians as one of the more perverse little hypocrisies of our era.

Cishet men really need to get used to the idea that the era when simply *being a man* guaranteed them sexual/romantic access to a wife or girlfriend is OVER. Women’s economic & social freedom to opt out of traditional heterosexual relationships should be sacrosanct.

If men need to be able to be a little bit misogynistic or else they'll vote for a rapist fascist, maybe it's not women who need to be more accommodating. Maybe men simply aren't mature and rational enough to vote.

As always, society considers men’s feelings about women’s autonomy to be of greater importance than women’s autonomy itself.

I would love for liberal-left men to understand that women deserve respect & to be treated with personhood by all men even if individual men are guaranteed to *never* have sexual or romantic access to ANY woman ever.

And to be very clear: Men don’t even have a right to sex with someone else.

It’s an absolute affront to all the people who are currently facing state-level revocation of their rights when men in positions of power would rather talk about — and try to “solve” — the “issue” of men’s access to sex rather than, like, ensure abortion is legal & trans people can exist.

The fact that there is societal-level mass hysteria about cishet men’s feelings regarding their (lack of) romantic/sexual access to women while women’s freedom is being targeted at the state level & trans people are being individually attacked is yet more proof that patriarchy undergirds everything.

Some cishet men failing to obtain the sexual/romantic access to women that patriarchy promised them is a completely acceptable trade off for women having the social, economic, & political freedom to exist autonomously outside heterosexual relationships. Like not even close.

Women have a right to autonomy. Men don't have a right to wives, girlfriends, or sex slaves.

Women’s freedom & autonomy are actually more worthy of protection than men’s feelings and we should not tolerate those who pretend otherwise.

The goal shouldn’t be to ensure boys can date girls; it should be to ensure boys respect women even if they never date anyone at all.

Boys who slut shame girls, call women land whales, complain about body counts, advocate for government-appointed girlfriends, say all women are evil golddiggers, or otherwise perpetuate manosphere rhetoric are being BAD and should be told so.

The right is openly leaning into Kinder, Küche, Kirche and guys on the left are on about "it's a scary time for young men." I bet it's kind of freeing to have so little sense of shame

Men believe their feelings about women’s autonomy are more valid & important than women’s autonomy itself & I think we should fight the fuck back.

It’s amazing how many of the arguments that boys are oppressed boil down to: “Not all boys are doing better than all girls, so we need to take away things from girls or the myth of male supremacy might finally crumble.”

There’s still a fundamental societal belief that sex is owed within marriages/relationships — particularly by women to men — without any regard for how or why the unconsenting partner may feel about it.

Boys who slut shame girls, call women land whales, complain about body counts, advocate for government-appointed girlfriends, say all women are evil golddiggers, or otherwise perpetuate manosphere rhetoric are being BAD and should be told so.

Women and girls are literally under attack and the narrative that men and boys are struggling in comparison to them is part of that attack. Their “struggle” as it’s so often harped on is that women and girls aren’t just bending the knee to them in all spheres of life

All the discourse about the plight of cishet boys serves to draw attention away from attacks on women’s bodily autonomy, vilification of trans people, rising sexual harassment of girls by boys, threats against birth control, etc etc etc

If you hear “sexually harassing girls is bad” or “denigrating people of color is bad” or “being a transphobic piece of shit is bad” and take from that the message “Boys Are Bad” that says much more about your perception of boys and how they should be allowed to behave than about anything else.

When men decide that advocating for women’s economic & social liberation, against sexual assault of women, for men to be involved in child & home care, etc is “man hating,” that’s an indictment on men — not feminists.

It’s why not only are extant “non-manly” male role models dismissed, but the idea that WOMEN could and should be role models to boys is written off entirely.

People like this — who loudly proclaim the woes of boys and men and claim to also oppose misogyny — can’t help but tell on themselves. If speaking out against men coercing women into sex is man hating, you’re just a misogynist. That’s all there is to it.

Women & girls can’t even advocate for their own liberation and autonomy (from gender roles, from heterosexual relationships, from laws against our bodily autonomy) without getting called man haters or receiving rape threats.

Imagine if men demonstrated to boys that women are worthy of being looked up to too. Imagine if our society pretended for one second that women’s autonomy is more important than men’s feelings about our autonomy.

The fact that men continually claim that the solution to men’s woes is to somehow give them sexual/romantic access to women and that that is *tolerated* is an indictment on our society.

I thought men weren’t allowed to be emotionally vulnerable 🙄 So many women have had men weaponize their feelings within the context of romantic relationships, but tell me again that men aren’t allowed to express emotions!

Women should not be forced back into traditional heterosexual relationships just to make men feel better. Women’s desire for singlehood & an escape from the gender roles into which we’ve been forced is more valid than cishet men’s desire for romantic/sexual access to women.