Very kind of my local dive bar to let me know the specific nights this summer to avoid that place like the goddamned plague.

The Knicks are the most millennial team because it’s a bunch of college friends trying to still hang out and start a podcast together and they all have a job where they work for the devil

Just used the induction stove in my kitchen for the first time and Oh My God it’s life-changing and amazing. Never goin’ back to gas!

Wow, to be in such great company on such a short list of some of the most memorable superstars and also J.D. Drew

GAZAB

Yard signs got me all fucked up, voted for a local roofing company.

I gave up my casual New York Giants fandom for my diehard Eagles fan wife, which is the same thing as Sam spitting in the face of his Ohio heritage to hang out with Jeffrey Epstein’s most famous Hollywood director friend.

ZUT ALORS

Popped a 2011 Kriek cherry lambic in celebration of our 15th wedding anniversary this week. Mariage Parfait indeed!

Layoff Counselor: Harry Verderchi

A real Benge Bungle

I walked across this intersection this week on a beautiful night when hundreds of people were out and about. Insane that some NYC residents complain about ***cyclists*** when you’ve got drivers operating like this.

My dog when I walk in

. @kosherguacamole.bsky.social and mine's LearnedLeague One Day Quiz: Questions Our Infant Could Answer is live so leave your diphthongs and consonant clusters at the door for these answers that all kinda sound like something a babbling baby might say learnedleague.com/oneday.php?7...

Tuned in to the Spurs game to see if Wemby would slap an opponent to cross-promote the return of NBC’s The Slap, but nah.

Some people shy away from being first in a turn lane during rush hour. Not me. That spotlight is exactly where I want to be

Need a judgment call from my fellow Learned League folks. Should the answer “CHUBAWUMBA” be an acceptable misspelling for “CHUMBAWAMBA”? Or am I just pissing the night away on this challenge?

The MLB Spaghetti Policy - Teams who will allow you to bring in a gallon ziplock bag of spaghetti 🍝 to a game. Want to add the Phillies here too. Their policy was unclear online but we found posts this morning showing they’d allow it too.

My son Eugene (8) and daughter Laverne (6) have seen every Police Academy film thirty-six times EXCEPT the fifth one which they consider “an abomination.”

Any more flagrant fouls like that from Wemby and we’re gonna have to call him Draymond Vert

I may be alone here but I sure love tuning in to playoff basketball to watch the refs confer.

Democracia em Vertigem

As is said of faculty politics, social media discourse preferring that 19 and not 21 percent of teams qualify is perhaps so heated because the stakes are so low.

Expanding the NCAA tournament is a good idea

Cubs pull off the foist shrimp of da year! Roll the tape, cousin!

Wut

RIP Ted Turner

RIP Ted Turner

Did they use A.I. to do that dogshit typeface work?

I used to clown on Sterling early on in the Twitter days—“waaaay back…caught in the outfield,” etc.—and man was I wrong. The guy was awesome. He had a joy and verve and was going to bust out the big voice and homespun nicknames no matter what. Baseball is WAAYYY better with people like him. RIP.

The greatest radio broadcaster in baseball history, and the only one who could recite the entire libretto to Kiss Me Kate

Rest in peace, legend

You know, if Embiid plays this good without an appendix he should seriously consider elective surgery to have his gall bladder removed before the Knicks series.

Hey if you know the guy or gal who did the sound mixing for Marty Supreme, let me know, I just wanna talk to them with the corniest 1980s song playing at the highest volume imaginable in the background.

Unfortunately I have to give New Jersey a win because Texas A&M gentrified the jalapeno www.texasmonthly.com/food/case-fo...

The Nationals did their fireworks tonight, with Guido Reichstadter still on the bridge. He’s where you can see the black banner hanging down.

New Jersey loves our woke Jeopardy king @feathersmcg.bsky.social

Every Knicks fan right now

Excited for either the Flyers to win this game so I can witness the animated exuberance of Philly fans, or for the Flyers to lose this game so I can witness the animated exuberance of Philly fans.

Releasing every episode of BEEF S2 on Netflix all at once really kills the discourse because if this was an HBO show, everyone would be up on a Sunday night talking about this insane scene

Last summer @kenpom.com and I talked it over and came to the considered conclusion that we're right. Well, now we'll find out. johngasaway.substack.com/p/ken-pomero...

Finally, it’s about damn time

Why does the icon for reporting a COVID-19 case on my firm's HR site look like a person slipping in some dogshit?

Pants, I can never remember if it starts with a silent K or not

Reggie Miller just said "Nothing but wetness" and I want to turn off my TV, sell it, and never watch sports again.

@maggiehendricks.bsky.social GUEST BIRD-LOOKER-ATTER

Watching 98-year-old Herbert Blomstedt deftly conduct the Berlin Phil playing Bruckner’s Seventh is as close a comparison to what LeBron James is doing with the Lakers right now.

Playing the long game (rooting for my favorite team to lose today and help West Ham stay up in the PL so we can continue to humiliate them in future years.)

Same vibe