Iranian officials declare that they will only negotiate with SpongeBob

Many people are saying the TSA is "woke"

Lmao Congress got me over here hooting and hollering for a fucking airline

As far as I'm concerned this is the Supreme Court

*overly defensive* I like the band Tool

3 on 3 is so dumb

Scrappy-Doo Benson out there

The Sabres have turned into the Touch Grass team. Oh the analytics aren't good? The stats don't support their 8 game win streak? Shut up nerd.

At this point if you ever turn a game off early you're a fool

It's so cool that the Buffalo Sabres are an entire team of professional hockey players, coaches, and support staff and every now and then they have to be reminded "instead of a bunch of passes through traffic, we just need to get a bunch of pucks to the net". I'd consider writing it down maybe.

Tage are you drunk wtf

Peterka doesn't score that goal, that's for sure. No question about that Doan trade, an absolute rock

Which Ducks player is going to commit a felony on Rasmus Dahlin tonight?

I'm kind of surprised the idiot whose dementia-riddled brain is stuck in 1985 hasn't suggested we start putting lead in the gasoline again.

I can't prove it but I feel like we could trace a lot of our woes to when we started doing civilian clothes with the backwards flag on the sleeve. Should've shut that down right away.

Nausea by Jean-Paul Sartre in high school was maybe not the best idea

You're telling me Elon's 20 year old kid is also a cringe asshole? I simply can't believe this.

Yes. Everyone is welcome. I don't care if the earth tips on its axis from the bandwagon overflow, everyone's welcome. I will haul you up by the cuffs of your jacket to make sure you're safely aboard. If someone makes you feel less than amazing for liking what the Sabres are doing, they're dumb.

Carrick is a bonafide stud. Trade of the year easily.

Fuck yeah!! Yes!!!

Poems are like F1 racing. Like good for you but I have no idea what’s going on here.

Wedge Antilles finding out the Empire has built a second Death Star:

If I was Splinter I'd have just given all 4 ninja turtles guns.

JD Vance quietly crossing out "Peace in the Middle East" and scribbling "Rain in Spain???" on an index card

"did you know the USPS is losing money" no I didn't know and I still don't care do you know how much money your president has lost you since January

This reminds me of Chris Jericho saying he thinks he was abducted by aliens because he blacked out on a country road and lost several hours. Definitely not because of a fifth of vodka.

Good morning, Sabres morning

scjerk strikes again

So far Sam Carrick has to be up there with all time trade deadline hits for this team right? Trade for a 4th liner and he's just potting points, dude is built for the playoffs. AND he's under contract through 2027. All for 2 late round draft picks!

GM!

I just realized it hasn't even been a year since Liberation Day when this dipshit crashed the entire economy and the entire imperial apparatus formed Voltron to prop it back up, and he immediately crashed it 2 or 3 more times.

The media industry should be in so many broken up companies that no one has a clue who has the film rights to Spiderman

Big iced tea matchup on Friday

SIMPLY HAVING A WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS TIME

Let's catch up on the hilarious Afroman defamation trial: defector.com/lets-catch-u...

This woman has more integrity and bravery than the entire White House press pool.

Got a call from the Snow Miser. The stop motion guy. From the 70s TV special. He said he won't be coming over to my house tonight because it's too cold for him. My house--too cold--for the *Snow Miser*. He's made of snow (?) and he loves it-and my house is too cold for him! I'm so cold right now

The Buffalo Sabres starting line tonight

Bronze lining to the whole Hormuz situation is a whole new generation gets to appreciate the best episode of television ever written m.imdb.com/title/tt1266...

going to the LAN party and disabling this on your friends' computers like you have to disable motion smoothing on your older relatives' TVs when you visit during the holidays

they say custer had a little bighorn but many people are saying that mine will be a big bighorn. maybe the biggest of all time

She's got attitude and her head is huge so I've been calling her Scrappy-Doo all day

Imagine being in 3-on-3 overtime and deciding to put Norris and Östlund on the ice. Bleak shit, what are you doing

Watching the Canadian broadcast for the hockey game, not a single insurance commercial. No bullshit crypto or AI ads. They're selling actual products (?) north of the border!

We now go live to the Buffalo Sabres dressing room during the first intermission