That bit between being offered a job and the new employer getting your references can fuck off quite frankly

No #totp

I'll house you up a treat mate #totp

Bryan Ferry doing his best Private Walker impression #totp

Gloria Estefan and the Hypnoboobs more like #totp #morelike

Mark Goodiers come straight from 4th form maths #totp

No #totp for me tonight. We're off out being fireworks nonces for the evening

Why does every single advent calendar now cost £90 and contain all the things you take home from a hotel room? What are we doing here?

A movie you've seen more than 7 times in a gif

Laurence Fox wrote a song about Charlie Kirk, and this is the only comment on it.

Today's book mini-haul

When you've #totp at 8 but are waiting tables at 9

But I thought Cleopatra were coming at cha? #totp

WELEASE WARWICK #totp

Is the guy outside flailing about ok? Does he need someone to sit with him? #totp

Showed the kids The Three Ravens episode of Jim Hensons Storyteller earlier and now the youngest is convinced everyone will turn into pigs in the morning #IfYouKnowYouKnow #TopParenting

Someone's been a bit careless opening a glittery xmas card #totp

Couple of Rayguns down front to distract from the tedium of the song I see #totp

Alright Jamie. All Saints aren't gonna go out with you #totp

Can't skeet. Too busy singing along #totp

Can I miss this thick persons wedding song please? #totp

Jamie Blue Screen Theakston as he came to be known #totp

It's just a little crush (your head) #totp

5ive will make you get down off that thing before you break your neck #totp

Thanks for the warning Jamie #totp

If you tolerate this then further Manics songs will be written. You've been warned #totp

This is my church, this is my steeple, look inside and there's all the people #totp

Megaphone guy doing his best Charlie Browns teacher impression #totp

If you could hit a note, any note, that'd be great #totp

Something about the wrong Ian Watkins being Ah better not #totp

Singing teachers have a lot to answer for #totp #GrowlingRonan

Birbs! #totp

me [from bedroom]: mommmmm! mom: what? why are you yelling me: grandma’s trying to pinch my cheeks mom: grandma’s dead hon me: that’s why i’m yelling

Make sure you check your kid's Trick or Treat chocolate tonight. Last Halloween my son bit into a mini Mars bar and found a John Virgo ‘Gotcha' from Noel's House Party inside

The shops really are missing a trick by not offering this as a Halloween costume.

The Smashing Machine sounds like something Sgt Wilson would say whilst looking at a tank

I'm dressing up as tell us 1 interesting fact about yourself as an icebreaker

Asylum seekers, housed in hotels in Manchester, are reaching out in their own words to address the concerns of the local community. Please take a minute to read their letter, & share it with the people in your life who need to hear the truth about the people they are protesting.

Oh Robbie with this 2nd song you are really spoiling us and by us I mean our day #totp

What can I do to get you to disband the corrs #totp

Who's this chancer? #totp

You can smell that hair through the screen #totp

Someone's overdone the back combing here #totp

Everything was alright til you started "singing" love #totp

They've come dressed as evil boyzone this week #totp

Play Needin U instead of the previous 6 songs you cowards #totp

I wish these were mysterious times. We know too much #TOTP

It's no You're Gorgeous is it thank fuck #totp