F1 in Canada but make it Mario Kart

Important heatwave news - temperatures in Bristol were so high that the splendidly-named "fire float" Pyronaut was brought out of retirement to help hose down a melting bridge.

GOOD MORNING LLANDUDNO

I donmt know who needs to hear this but, Llandudno.

if sugar was protein I'd be so fucking jacked

Fabulous clarification in today's Observer. Stonehenge!

Can we all agree there needs to be a law requiring smartphones to double check the night before that your standard Monday morning alarms still apply on a Bank Holiday.

I’m not saying BBC Sport is struggling for the rights to show mainstream sports, but they’ve got live coverage of the cheese rolling from Cooper’s Hill in Gloucestershire.

“The regular early morning yell of horror was the sound of Arthur Dent waking up and suddenly remembering where he was.” Happy Towel Day!

TOTTENHAM MOTHERFUCKING HOTSPUR

Don't hackers normally take money out of your account?

the hungry observatory

An incredible piece of work. Really worth a watch.

“Shoulda gone to my wedding, dad,” he whispers from the bushes.

Such sad news. Sending love and best wishes to Danny and Mindy.

Stephen Colbert is a national treasure: The day after his show was canned after 11 years by CBS to appease a tyrant, he shows up on the Monroe, MI public access channel where he did his first Late Show broadcast in 2015.

Being a dad means seizing the opportunity to yell “well if I was you I wouldn’t go to those places” when a character on a cartoon your son’s watching says they’ve broken their arm in 3 places.

So what happens when Reform take over your local council? This. #KentCountyCouncil

2nd Annual Oscar Mayer Wienie 500 🌭 Full Race 🏁 INDYCAR on FOX #Indianapolis500 | #Indy500 | #Indycar | #IMS | #TheGreatestSpectacleInRacing

Testing it out of curiosity, I feel like Google's new AI search mode sides with whichever papers make the strongest claims (regardless of whether or not they're true.) This has major, shit implications for information retrieval - the most hyped claims are rewarded with AI search rating you higher

Car guy tip: If your car's transmission tanks, don't pay a mechanic to rebuild it. Even with some new parts, it's old and worn out. Go to a junkyard and get a low-mileage trans and do a swap. Saves thousands.

This is probably because the sort of people who want to make life better are careful because they’re worried about unintended consequences, whereas the ones who don’t give a shit, well they don’t give a shit.

I’ll never forget our four bears’ sacrifice

First Brexit, then immigration and now this. What, if anything, does Andy Burnham actually disagree with Keir Starmer about?

It’s so much more fun when you beat the Yankees.

Introduce yourself with ten numbers 8,032 365 235 99.94 158 501 333 376 104 16.43

Well it’s great we’ve decided to build HS2 to go only half way to our supposed second city.

An interesting thing about NASA is that they’ve never had to worry whether scrubbing a launch for safety reasons would impact their IPO

There are days when I miss being an editor. I loved writing headlines. Whoever did this, I hope they took the rest of the day off.

It sort of reads as a threat: “protect bees, or they’ll remember your face”

Also (sorry, but honestly) if I had to make a list of places cis men couldn't go to because a cis man had made a women "uncomfortable" there, it would be very long and there would be literally nowhere for men to go.

hey here’s an idea, what if you got rid of the fucking guns

“Do you know your brother’s a nonce, your majesty?” “You hum it and by jove I’ll play it”

One of the slightly odder strings to my bow is that I do, occasionally, value model railway collections. Usually this is for people newly widowed whose partner has left a bunch of stuff that they have no idea what to do with. So let's talk about how that relates to this story. 🧵

Hard to overstate the impact Trump’s having around the world. Our annual accounts were presented this week and it basically went “that stupid fuck did something stupid, then we had our own problems, then we recovered really well from that, and then that fucking moron did an even dumber thing”

Don’t tell me there’s another by-election coming

Just a gentle reminder that this is what your foreign aid budget was for, to prevent shit like this. But instead you gave Bezos tax breaks.

What do the know of Alec Guinness, whom only Star Wars know? He is very funny in this.

Quote with a fictional band that is not Spinal Tap.

this is a masterpiece

I absolutely LOVE this film. A classic Hitchcock thriller.

Very sad that in 5 days Andy won’t be a Liverpool player anymore. What an absolute legend.

Can’t be the only one who immediately thinks of The Day Today

Yeah… 🤣

Madeline Kahn as Lili Von Shtupp in the outrageous comedy classic, Blazing Saddles (1974) Directed by Mel Brooks. "Let's face it I'm tired."