Imagine surviving the apocalypse only to be hunted down by boat and harvested for your delicious piss by this Jesus army mother fucker

Little girl at work this morning told me she had got her finger stuck in a unicorn. I said that was the most unusual library injury I've ever heard.

Me at Goodison tonight. Smiling, as the match hadn't started yet Vigilant, as there was a massive pile of dog shit on the floor behind me. #UTFT

EVERTON WOMEN PLAYERS VISIT EVERTON IN THE COMMUNITY TO SURPRISE LOCAL GIRLS TEAM #everton #football

Someone said to me, "I'm sorry but I got your book from a library." Nobody should ever apologise for that. You read my book! That's brilliant! I grew up hanging out in libraries and the idea of a world without them fills me with dread. Without libraries, authors, like readers, will only suffer.

How are things in general?

This #WarmWelcomeWeek and throughout the winter public #Libraries have been acting as Warm Welcome Spaces - offering a hot drink or simply a quiet place to shelter from the weather. Find your nearest @warmwelcomeuk.bsky.social space. www.warmwelcome.uk/find-a-space

Everton Women Supporters' Club @ELFCFans will be at the Winslow on Friday night, before the game v Brighton at 7pm. Come an see some of the great merchandise and support Everton Women in the WSL 💙 www.eticketing.co.uk/evertonfc/ED...

"Reading can be magic!" Happy 92nd birthday Tom Baker, author, presenter of The Book Tower and, let me see now oh yes, the best #DoctorWho⁠. (Other Doctors are available.) @backlisted.bsky.social

Everton Women draw Liverpool away in the FA Cup https://www.eucup.com/1463312/ Everton Women will take on Liverpool in the fifth round of the Women’s FA Cup away from home. Brien Sorensen’s side defeated West Bromwich Albion 5-0 in the previous round thanks to a brace of goals from Yuka Momiki. …

The Sacred Memory Bank opens today at Kirkby Gallery. It’s on until Friday 27th March. Assemblage. Collage. Word. Mike Badger & Jeff Young. Come ! Details: cultureliverpool.co.uk/events/the-s...

youtu.be/9GMjH1nR0ds?... It's Blue Monday apparently which means at approx 2.30pm we've all got to stop, drop and roll to this. Come on grandad it's a belter!

They’ve done it!! 🇸🇳🤩 Congratulations to Idrissa, Ili and Senegal – #AFCON2025 champions!!! 🏆

Remember, there's no such thing as Monday, it was made up by a travel company in 2005. Welcome to Tuesday.

Friedrich Nietzsche, 1875.

Can't get enough of your goals lad. #UTFT

Five possible future #Everton infringements. Having a shirt untucked. Pulling a weird face. Running too quick for the Linesman. Timewasting when waiting for a stretcher. The cut of their jib.

One of the finest forwards to represent the Toffees at our old home. Happy birthday, Bob Latchford. 💙

Miserable weather but great to see the anti vaxxers in Sevvy Park getting rained on.

You can listen to our programme about Scouse now, or wait till it goes out on Sunday. www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m...

Up the Rainbow Stairs. The Sacred Memory Bank. Kirkby Gallery. Works by Mike Badger and Jeff Young. Monday 19th January - Friday 27th March. Come and see us!

Come on Everton, pull your finger out! Even Reform have managed to sign on a new RIght Winger.

LOW[E]: released on this day in 1977 youtu.be/JhZqsYkl1zI?... @davidbowiereal.bsky.social @garycrowleyonair.bsky.social @punkandnewwave.bsky.social @carolinebinnie.bsky.social @muzicgeezer.bsky.social @stevomusicman.bsky.social @ndb66.bsky.social @dubcadet.bsky.social

Marsh Harrier and Hen Harrier seen today at Parkgate on the Wirral, here the Marsh Harrier. England for #BirdsSeenIn2026

For the past five days I have been trying to remember this mans name. Last night as I drifted off to slept I suddenly called out "Christopher Walken!" I hope that simultaneously, somewhere on this rock we call home, Christopher Walken called out my name and felt a similar sense of satisfaction.

Wishing Clare Wheeler a very happy birthday!

The microscopic tardigrade lives virtually everywhere on earth. After appearing over 600 million years ago, this little beast has survived each of the 5 mass extinctions. It can repair its own DNA; an example that tells us life will always persevere. 😊 frontlinegenomics.com/everything-y...

Don't just use the library because it helps you (even though it does). Use the library because doing that keeps the library open for other people.

The universe is a cruel, uncaring void, The key to being happy isn't a search for meaning. It's to just keep yourself busy with unimportant nonsense, and eventually, you'll be dead

All sat in yet another pointless meeting wearing our pointless meeting survivor badges. I predict a riot!

subscriptions >>> shop.viz.co.uk/viz351bs

Daughter's been given antibiotics for the dog bite. Suggested she give the bill for the prescription to the woman who let her dog sink it's teeth into her leg.

Another symptom of the celebrity books culture that we're seeing, especially in children's books. Publishers who don't see the long-term damage of this are undermining their own industry, leading people to believe that anyone famous can write a kid's book, because they're not *real* books.

Daughter has been bitten by someone's dog on her post round and now has to go to get a tetanus shot. Got the usual tepid couldn't give a shit response from the owner. Love dogs hate a lot of dog owners.

Wanna see some Newts?

Everton Women’s Official Supporters’ Club independent website is now officially launched, where you can support our brilliant women’s team, hear all the news from Goodison Park and check out their range of great merchandise. www.ewosc.co.uk

I know its a long shot but to rub salt into the wounds of yesterday my youngest left his scarf somewhere at the match yesterday. Got a load of badges on from this seasons Home games. Hes gutted. Any reposts appreciated in the hope it might be recovered.

Be happy - life is too short and pleasures brief.

Dixie Dean strikes a dramatic pose during the 1931/32 game at Arsenal.

Everton shite again but : That kit is bad juju. All need burning tonight and I don't want it anywhere near our women's team tomorrow. #UTFT

Also it’s Mike Leigh on BBC4 tonight and NUTS IN MAY IS ON

Wank Me Off To Watership Down It's 10:00AM

If Everton's new kit is meant to celebrate the city why has it not got a picture of that fella who used to roller skate around the bottom of Church Street to Baby Jane by Rod Stewart in it? #UTFT

Exciting wyrd folk double bill at the Poly tonight.

Day 9 of the super flu. Nothing super about it.

Been out every night never drunk so much.

The Sooty Show (7th January 1987). Sweep - upset that the others have been ignoring him recently - decides to pretend he's very, very depressed (writing everything down in a book entitled 'Sweep's master plan for more ATTENTION').

"The Venga Boys are coming and everybody's jumping " #UTFT