ICE, get the fuck out of Minneapolis or we WILL lock up our own citizens

on this day exactly 25 years ago, I pointed at a beautiful woman across the street & said "that's the girl I'm gonna marry one day,” but it turned out to be a lamppost

Black vulture lurking outside my window.

"You have a collect call from 'goingoutafterschoolbehomeat7.' Will you accept the charges?"

Squirrel Squadron - 2025 Charcoal on paper

If you decide late on a Friday evening that you want a baguette, you’re gonna end up straight fucked.

Fresh batch of garden tomatoes from Kathy!

My friend has an ex-Amish horse that has had terrible feet problems and just got diagnosed with some shitty disease. I didn’t realize the Amish were known for their awful treatment of horses. Pretty horrifying. Fuck them. (It’s fine, they won’t see this)

Baby Alan and baby Sticks

Baby Alan and baby Sticks

day 5 posting margot photos from the archives, for morale

Ida going all in with the posing today

The world feels rough right now So please enjoy this shrimp, filmed off Cozumel, Mexico. It may be a larval reef shrimp, but we don’t know what species or how long it lives or what it eats. The world is still full of wonder and beauty and mystery. 🎥 @pedrovalenciam scuba diver on Insta

Almost got into two fights at the library.

Every word, a stepping stone on an amazing journey.

I woke him up. Im just the worst #ratsky

More from the Cactus Wren nest 🪶

The chill I get when someone I just texted calls me in response. The horror as I hold the pulsing phone that betrayed me. My shallow breath visible as it meets the wintry night air.

i know we're all busy but i just overheard a plumber say "parlez-vous français ? non ? you motherfuckers don't even speak french, do you" to a pair of french bulldogs

Full Purple Finch Rainbow in the yard yesterday! Fun fact: Upper left male is what Purple Finch are "supposed" to look like. Others are genetic mutations. Funky fun colors are passed from father to son. What would they be named if someone had seen an "other colored" first? Orange Finch? #birds🪶

After the killing of Ms Good, Greg Bovino of the CPB led a raid on a Minneapolis HS. An official there said: They don’t care. They’re just animals,” I’ve never seen people behave like this.” All MPLS schools now closed for the week. www.mprnews.org/story/2026/0...

"He never sleeps, the judge. He is dancing, dancing. He says that he will never die. Thanks to a refreshing shot of 5 Hour Energy" - Carl's Jr. Blood Meridian or or, the Evening Redness in the direct flights from SouthWest Airlines"

I can assure you that these rats are the only ones you want inside your home. They won’t root through your trash or chew on the electrical lines. They just play happily in the photos that will hang on your wall.

Plenty of calendars left if you have found yourself calendar-less for the past six days🤩🤩🤩🐀🐀🐀

I'm sorry, but this is the Perfect Couple. She wants to run and he wants to spin. Teamwork made the dream work.

If you have the space, means and collection: a northern Texas warehouse full of proto-Redbox VHS vending machines from the mid-1980s is being evicted. The machines are free and whatever isn't taken will imminently be scrapped. www.facebook.com/commerce/lis...

(My) art of October 2025. (These posts didn’t seem to be of that much interest to people, but I’ll be a completist about it. Hi ) By the way, now Christmas Day is done and you’re terribly disappointed you didn’t get any of my art, you could buy yourself some for fun. www.chloecumming.com

Look who trashed the hotel room again

LMAO I am dying laughing.

My parents are divorced so we have two January 6ths

Watched 3 and a half Saw movies today for no particular reason. There’s something about all those elaborate murder traps that feels kind of soothing, like watching videos of dominos getting knocked over or playing that board game Mousetrap.

Comparing my ~1.5 year old standard Coffee and my ~1.5 year old dwarf Pumpkin Seed - it really cracks me up that Pumpkin is about the size of Coffee's head lol, its like comparing a chihuahua to a dane 😂 Also guess who wears the pants in this relationship? Its not Coffee...

Weird how all of us who went to college back in the 90's had a phase where we hung out with the singer from Incubus.

The Tufted Flycatcher is a fantastic little bird found in above 700m in Costa Rica. These little birds will return to one perch repeatedly, hunting for insects. This one was tracking lunch from below. Santa Elena Reserve #CostaRica #birds #nature

😭 like come on bruh 😭

Rough lighting but some real great goose roll this morning 🪶

Apple Photos Reminds Man He Was Nude In Capitol Building 5 Years Ago

Squassage, 2022

These calendars are beautiful. The rats are somewhat plump, so next year’s calendar may have them working out at the gym.

extremely difficult to explain to my offline friends the daily whiplash I recieve on this website by like, having a stranger yell at me over an old joke about eating molten lava only to click on their profile to find they exlusively post about wanting to suck a dog's dick. how did you find me

Chopper eating a piece of baguette 🐀👨‍🎨

OUT: Helping you pay for health care. IN: Helping oil companies pay for their infrastructure in a foreign country.

This is how she always sits on her porch: feet perfectly aligned, hands tucked into her coat

Here’s Greg, my most insolent child

Vintage Terry

An incredible feeling to find a season of Top Chef I’ve only seen one time. (Portland). I’m PMSing obvi but I love all these chefs like they’re my children.

How hard does it have to be to breathe before you use a rescue inhaler? Don’t think I formally “have asthma” but I have a prescribed rescue inhaler bc I’m allergic to my rats and the outside. My rule of thumb is I won’t use it unless my wheezing gets too annoying. (No I won’t ask my dr.)

we've got some ICE shit going down in our little town today and it took like three minutes for a convoy of wine moms to start chasing them around town. normies hate this shit and are putting in the work

tough choice