follow me for more birds. i just keep following other birds, lol always works

im so before my time. you can tell because it is so not my time

russian roulette critic: 1/5. terrible RNG. no skill expression, devs pls patch. add 1-5 bullets to taste

tbh i cant stand reality tv. reality sucks, that’s why i’m watching tv

kinda crazy how adult life is just everyone pretending to not be depressed

6 * 7 = 42

happy turkey day! so grateful it’s not goose season

finally someone made the Cones of Dunshire

every morning i wake up, and it’s starting to get really upsetting

Just got an air fryer. How much air do yall usually fry for dinner?

damn the mamdani help line queue is full. im just calling to get the worksheet for arabic numerals. i cant count past 7. or before 7 either

tag me on anything for goose opinions. i am a real goose. yes, real. you can tell bc pastel my feathers are typing but ig can do voice. have been fat feartyherging. Hey Siri should I use grammar online

wish they had volunteer firing squads. but like to stand in front of the bullets

hey baby are you the one? but like neo in the matrix? because you dodged me like a bullet

weirdly like ai summaries on notifs; i need more semicolons in my life

i hate glass. more like iOS ass. i get minimalism more like assism. why is everything inverted. this ruins swift

It’s like some of you have never seen jerry. like how

a dog store for apps. no not for you, for the dogs from dogs vs cats to run a podcast

Down with AWS! Down with- oh

Damn we’d invent so many jail cell door keys! But they’d probably all be a stupid bluetooth fob that goes down with aws

dont try quackdrilateral equations. not even once bsky.app/profile/goos...

lol can you imagine buying ice cream and it’s just called jerry’s.

i have killer text game. if she’s also autistic, adhd, and into elevator models and their chime tones by manufacturer. but i’d so date an otis gen2 like dependable but needs consistent maintenance,

This meme by my friend @ok-u.bsky.social is absolute pure gold. I refuse to hear otherwise. She is a great person

this one i would actually label not joke

your favorite music being latest music is kinda crazy when you think about it. like holy shit really they’ve been doing this thing for thousands of years, but no yea some 17 year old from Michigan who made a new ableton drum loop to rap to is really changing everything holy shit

im pastel now and it’s so much more fab than watercolor. I blame water for watering my color

today's mood

my timbers are so shivered

honkus ponkus motherhonkers. happy halloween

happy halloween to what many people believed was the greatest tweet of all time

happy nubboween, my dear criminal tony <3

Not sure the genetics are the part of myself I want to pass onto the next generation

with every new release, i cant tell if AI is actually getting smarter, or humans are just getting dumber

slowly raising my dose of microplastics in my food every day to build immunity

love using an empty prepaid card for free trials. it’s actually insane how many times most services will repeatedly try to charge you when your trial ends. especially great when it’s hard to cancel, which should be illegal

they should invent a bed for sleeping

i need a pillow

Honestly, I don’t think we give clothes enough credit. - I’m cold - I don’t want to see everyone’s sex organs - I’d like to minimize bruising & bleeding - I don’t love getting salad dressing on my stomach Great job clothes. And again, I’m not high.

bill gates says AI will take our jobs. can it happen sooner? also can i take AI’s job? i do a mean watercolor

Irrational numbers must be so scared all the time

I didnt finish my evil spell to end the world tonight but Ill try again tomorrow

i need jokes someone please send me jokes

Does anyone here play Megabonk? I got top 2% lol. Need tips for the grind

im out vibe farming

lets get started doing nothing

it’s really easy guys. if we all work together and only like the non doom posts surely the scroll has to get better

"I never know what to do with my hands" I mutter to myself, trying to fit my hand collection in an undersized box

When I was a kid, the War on Drugs was a guy dressed as a Dog Detective or a commercial where they scramble eggs. Now it's like predator drones and shit.

spotted a rare bun on my walk. bro looks like he’s seen some shit