Get the snooker on

I tell you what, that Santa Claus has got real presence about him

It was class, exceeded expectations

Debut Padel session later for Fraser's birthday 🎾

Football is dead isn’t it.

Rich, Italian, and still looks terrible in a suit. What a cunt Gianni Infantino is.

Tremendous finish from Dalot there

Had to factory reset my phone remotely as a last resort having suddenly and repeatedly not been able to get my lock screen pattern correct. I just.. forgot it. Gone. Next day call with the bank hammered home the feeling of being old. I do not and cannot recommend it. Back up your phone.

And an Eric Cantona 🌲 United! United!

A three-part story

Blue on blue!

JCB is the Goldilocks of golf courses: slightly too wet or too cold and it's closed. Ideal winter golf conditions this afternoon again. Yesterday was surprisingly good at home, temperatures have firmed the fairways. Not played for two weeks and it was like, ah yes, I remember why I love it.

It's a censorship engine designed to promote ideas that Elon Musk likes and suppress ideas that Elon Musk does not like. I really don't get why this evident fact - that Musk openly admits! - is so hard for so many people to understand

We back up

Pop the tennis on at 5pm

S tier roast side btw

Hell of a finish at the DP WT, Rory getting a read on this eagle putt coming up..

Flippant use of high importance in these emails if you ask me, as sure a sign as any 🚓⚖️

Unsustainable graphics

when the bouncers have reluctantly let me into the club but immediately realise they’ve made a horrible mistake

Got a Christmas tingle, but also fuck Christmas.

Cliché bingo today. If I hear "trees are 90% air" one more time I stg. Did enjoy saying "well out" when a guy skied his drive barely off the tee. Gotta give a bit back. Went down well. Thanks to Scouse Kyle in the shed prior for that one, much obliged.

Hilarious. Great television.

Would be great though, Joe

Looking forward to seeing Cat Burns win tonight

I feel we should have got beyond fireworks as a species. Flashy lights and bangs in the air? Grow, up everyone.

🦫 🌝 tonight, btw.

Passed my driving test four years ago today, easy one to remember 🎇🎆🎇 Braced for bad news - six month wait for another in '21 🦠 - then told I got three minors. Now mobile, started playing golf again the following spring, three and a half years ago. Steep trajectory since. 🚀

Inbox— next cover of the New Yorker: “Mayor Mamdani,” by Edel Rodriguez

New map of the cool parts of NYC just dropped.

Christ, he is supernaturally good at this.

Clayton Blackmore: surprisingly down to earth and VERY funny. Decent golfer too.

microplastics is such a bottom tier generational poison they used to put hard drugs in the sodapop

It’s not ever about the numbers—you can bring insane audience engagement, views, eyeballs to your verticals, shape the conversation in wonderful ways, win awards and on and on And they still will nuke your job and your entire desk in the name of capital consolidation and kissing the fucking ring

As promised, a longer read:

Fraser went trick or treating round the village on his own last night, dedication, love that for him.

My entry in the Trump ballroom discourse. It’s a monument to Trump’s insecurities, a symbol of our descent into authoritarianism, and a gaudy bribery palace all in one. Read at @liberalcurrents.com www.liberalcurrents.com/trump-loeil-...

David has no business being in the final #thetraitors

Buzzing that Joe has got it eventually. #thetraitors 🪙

If not now, when. She's played that perfectly 🐈 #thetraitors

Went to a big Waitrose ravenous straight from work, big mistake 💰

I've never owned a Facebook account so don't underestimate my pettiness in avoiding using AI

Further thoughts on social media stopping being like the pub, and the hollow weirdness of it all. open.substack.com/pub/joelmorr...

Required reading ⤵️

NEW: The cleavage shot no UK tabloid will print. If you want to understand how truly ignorant and absent the British media is on Russian interference, read on. A Kremlin spy scandal, a trove of bikini shots....and still nothing but tumbleweed. open.substack.com/pub/broligar...

People don't hack into TV networks and forcibly broadcast the truth as much as I thought they would when I was small

MCTOMINAY ARE YOU MADDDDD??? THE AUDACITYYYY

Total football