Apparently overt xenophobia is dress code compliant at my local Target. The family in line right behind me? Was not English-speaking. 😡 Yes, I said something. Yes, this timeline sucks.

Proving my point: He had a typo in the first draft of this post when he showed it to me. 👩‍🎓

Talking about today’s Rapture news and I find out that @jwgoerlich.bsky.social unironically watched the Left Behind movies in the early aughts w/ *no* religious context at all… and kept waiting for the aliens to arrive & explain where all the people went. My “preacher’s grandkid” mind is reeling.

Hey, question: Who do I know that knows people at HushMail? Ideally someone with decision making authority on the legal/compliance side of things.

I made 350 “cybersecurity starter packs” to give out at the ATSA national conference this month. Each one has a sticker, a usb condom, a camera cover, and a card with 10 easy security habits. I’ll also be presenting on Tuesday the 16th- stop by and say hello!

Looking for an expert in the philosophy of robots to interview for an episode of Securing Sexuality. Is that you? Or someone you know? Reach out! #robots #philosophy #digitalethics #cybersecurity #hackers

LeGuin wrote about the desire for 'unassailable safety' as one of the deep roots of evil, and I think about that a lot.

There's a direct line from "no kink at Pride" and "no sex in movies and books unless it Serves The Plot" to payment processors feeling completely empowered to censor art globally

Very niche question: Who in the #infosec community 1) plays #mahjongg and 2) is gonna be at #Blackhat? I’d love to set up some cocktail bar pickup games while we’re in town.

Oh it’s happening!! And you can preorder it here: www.routledge.com/Securing-Sex...

Securing Sexuality: the book. Tech drives how we meet, date, marry, raise kids. Attacks on it undermines our agency and privacy. This book, written with @stefanigoerlich.bsky.social, helps therapist, coaches, activists think like punk, act like a hacker, and take back control over our private lives.

Stefani Goerlich giving the closing keynote at #BSidesDetroit. “We’re confusing information sharing with intimacy and surveillance with love.”

So incredibly honored and humbled by the kind words about my work. 🩷

🤌

Despite what my certificate from today says, I am *not* a cybersecurity expert. So you don’t HAVE to listen to me. But, c’mon guys… please don’t give your biometric data to effing Steak ‘n Shake. 🤦🏻‍♀️

I have both a pull-quote and the last word in this new article from EuroNews! Happy birthday to me! www.euronews.com/culture/2025...

Someone once casually dropped “Abusers groom allies too” into a conversation and my entire worldview shifted in that instant.

2 people are in the bedroom. One says “put this in FRONT of the bedroom door, so I remember to take it with me.” Where would you put the thing: A ) Inside the bedroom, where you’d open the door to exit. B ) Outside the bedroom in the hallway, where you’d see it once you’d opened the door to exit.

Join Midori for an exclusive Patreon dive into controversial A24 film, Babygirl, w/ forensic s*xologist & clinical social worker @stefanigoerlich.bsky.social bit.ly/3BYA7N7

In my 1st PhD cognate class (a non-Social Work subject related to my research) & in the profs introduction she tells us that she got her degree in this field & after realizing that she wouldn't succeed in her 1st-choice major: Social Work. ...I'm just gonna keep my mouth shut this term. 🤐

AMA.

Me: I’m so sad we’re not going back to Israel next month for my birthday. My Israeli friends: SURPRISE! We’re gonna be in Detroit next month, just in time for your birthday! Me: 🥰

Okay, I fulfilled my Jewish mitzvah of Chinese food and a movie for Christmas. Unfortunately, we decided to see Babygirl. Now? I have to do my duty as a Sex Therapist & BDSM/kink author to tell y’all that it’s just SO bad. I hated it. HATED it. Did we learn *nothing* from the 50 Shades fiasco?

Iris Apfel died on March 1st of this year. I messaged my tattoo artist the day her passing was announced. He books 6-9 months out. Yesterday was finally “Iris Day.” I hope we all can live as long, as joyfully, and as authentically. May we all have style. 👑

Oh hey! Are you stuck on what to get your partner as a holiday gift this year? I’m giving away *five* autographed copies of my book for couples plus a special (for grown-ups only!) toy. Just follow me here, share this post, & comment below for a chance to receive a holiday gift from me! 🎁

Incredible news! Montana’s Supreme Court just affirmed that the state’s gender affirming care ban is likely unconstitutional. This makes the state the first state Supreme Court to rule that trans medical care is protected. This applies REGARDLESS of what the US Supreme Court does.

The ovulation tracking app, "Ovia", now mandates you identify what state you live in. Delete immediately and warn anyone who might need to know.

Today I set a clear role-and-responsibility boundary by looking a professional colleague dead in the eye and telling them “This is not my circus. I am but a monkey” like the (definitely grown-up and) consummate professional that I am. 😎

Kink (mental health) providers- quote post w a photo & your fav kinks - Boundary setting - Validating Big Feelings - Cognitive Challenging - Shame Reduction - Normalization - Administering Hard Truths - BDSM psychoeducation - Trauma Care (Am I doing this right?)

Working on a paper for my PhD Social Stats class. We get to use our own area of research interest for each assignment; which is how I came to create this lil beauty right here. E.L. James might be a terrible writer; but she spawned a veritable kink science renaissance.

Introduce yourself as a TV character

Hey Stef, do you cosplay? No… I dress like Persephone pretty much every day, why?

Today, an Israeli Jewish backpacker was beaten in Thailand. Yesterday, a Jewish student was assaulted in a nightclub in Ireland. The day before, Jewish schoolgirls in London were attacked in the streets with glass bottles. When will this end?

🎶You wanna go where people know/that people are all the same🎶 🎶You wanna go where everybody/knows your name 🎶

Thanksgiving is over! That means it’s time to bust out the awesome holiday shirt I designed.

This Thanksgiving was SUCH an adventure. We… - Blew a fuse - Broke the turkey in half - Realized that virgin Old Fashioned’s are a terrible idea - Played board games - Drank an entire bottle of rosé solo (okay that was just me) - Discovered who was more okay with cannibalism that they should be.

Take it from a therapist: Marriage is about compromise. It’s about celebrating the mundane wins that sustain a relationship. It’s about commitment. It’s buying 50 AirWick Plug-Ins when you realize that the first scent you & your spouse have EVER agreed on is a limited edition for the holidays.

I booked an appt w/my tattoo artist 10 months ago to get a portrait of Iris Apfel. Turns out? My partner isn’t sold on the idea- and it would be in a very visible spot. I want to honor that and hold off on Iris until we both are ready to look at her for the next 50 years; but I still have the appt!

Hello Jews of Bluesky. If you would like to be included in the new JewSky Plus feed repost this! And if you ever want to be removed from it, undo the repost! https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:24atmhsxslaeuvf2gcmv7fh3/feed/jewsky-plus

Busted out 7 different documents for an IRB proposal that’s (hopefully) being submitted tomorrow. Saw two clients. Now I’m writing a 5-page coding summary analysis for my Qual class. Is this what a weekend looks like? I think I’ve forgotten.

I put a Bluetooth speaker lightbulb in the bathroom so I could listen to audiobooks in the shower. Sometimes? I forget it’s there and scroll Insta while @jwgoerlich.bsky.social is getting ready. This results in him getting surprise-yelled at by politicians from on high while he pees. Oops? 🤣

Update: I got an A- on my 2nd big Social Stats exam… which my prof insists on calling NOT a test but a “take home skill demonstration” (that just happens to be worth 25% of my final grade)

My mother asked me to “say hi to everyone at Shabbat for me,” and since Shabbat happens everywhere? I’m just gonna tell you all: My mom says hi.

Hey, remember this? Well guess what- I survived the week and Shabbat is almost here!! I’ve worked out. I’ve showered. I’ve rested. And pretty soon I’m gonna put on a nice dress and some sparkly boots and go pray. Then? Dinner with friends. I love Shabbat. 🩷🕯️🕯️🩷

According to this study, pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC... The Social Science PhDs only have a 56% completion rate. Challenge accepted, I guess. 🎓

I wanna spend a year in Prague. Serious question: has anyone here done that? Are you living there now?

Imagine…

I got an A on my first major PhD writing assignment. After 5-6 books, you’d think I know how to write a solid lit review, but having my prof write “this is excellent” really works wonders for my imposter syndrome!

Back in August I reached out to a local org that I was told needed my help as a (highly specialized) volunteer. I contacted their staff three times, by various means. Never heard back from anyone. Until today! …when they sent me an end of year fundraising request. 🤦🏻‍♀️