Searching Zocdoc for Chicago’s hottest podiatrist

Looking sharp as hell @swor.bsky.social!!

When one of your handsomest bloomfs ask for sewing tips, you stop what you’re doing and lock in with them. Mandarinnn!!! You absolutely nailed this buddy!!!! 🤩🤩🤩

Getting over him by texting every day, checking his location, and hanging out together on days ending in Y. This is going to work 🤡👍

I genuinely need to wrestle someone right now

I received the following instructions from Yoko Ono and I need participants to help fulfill the command.

I actually like playing video games, but aside from mario and a couple other little things on switch, I don’t really play anything. But this week I’ve played about 5 hours of Split Fiction at a friend’s and it’s all I can think about. It’s sooo cute.

we're not gonna make it to 2027

The rapid rep weight slam angry face guy wants everyone in this gym dead

Back to wfh ☕️🥱

Last night’s karaoke crew featuring @onemorechris.bsky.social @mnrd-brian.bsky.social @knate-thorne.bsky.social and @obscureverses.bsky.social. I went full 90s with Nirvana, Usher, and Backstreet Boys 🎤😎

If you’re still Meta sexual and wanna see more of my creative projects I have a crafty IG account where I post stuff like these lounge shorts I made, gimme follow: @sven.made

Video showing off the shirt I made to wear to a NYE party that I sent to my mom and dad 😁 ( #voicereveal! )

On call home-delivery barber out here saving all these gays who waited too long to book w/ their barbers before NYE 💈💈💇‍♀️

Holy bloomf sighting batman 🤯 bsky brunch with the one and only @thomcb88.bsky.social 🥰🥰🥰 (even more handsome IRL if you can believe!!)

I’m over halfway through Name of The Wind (required reading for fantasy lovers??) and I fucking despise the main character

Was really hoping to be invited to a white elephant this year so I could wrap all 12 bottles of the Christian-hot-sauce-of-the-month subscription my father in law gifted for us last year.

The time of year when all your thirst traps show red scratch marks from winter itch

Drove to Indiana today to pick up a brand new sewing machine I bought on FB marketplace. Endeared myself so much to the seller that he gave me two pounds of freshly smoked salmon from his fridge. Score?

First quilting project. Guys I might be hooked. Approaching my final form as a little mouse who lives in a shoe 🐭🧵🪡

Party prep with my favorite Christmas goose

Zoo lights fit check

Feliz Navidad para mi

NEED TO GET NOG’D 🥛🥚🥃

Karaoke, except I go around from house to house with other people and we sing holiday songs in four part harmony

I stayed up until 4:30 this morning working on a sewing project and listened to a fantasy audiobook. Had an absolute fucking blast.

Actually I change my mind

All I want for Christmas

I’m always saying this about @benjibark.bsky.social

Where my apple lovers

My version of Sunday funday … first time quilting 🧵🪡☺️

End of the year has me reflecting on the joys of 2025, like the time a friend and I swapped and wore each other’s underwear for a week solid before giving them back.

Santa’s little dumb gay elf

Company holiday party with me and 47 women here we gooooo

I feel such a kinship with all my fellow Andersonville/Edgewater/Uptown gays who work out at Anytime Fitness

I need the name of the f***t in charge of this ad campaign

Spent Saturday evening cosplaying as a member of @obscureverses.bsky.social and @knate-thorne.bsky.social’s family… mainlining holiday cheer with the handsomest boys!!

The cultural impact of Rob Reiner cannot be understated. Legend isn't big enough a word. It goes to 11. You can't handle the truth. As you wish. I'll have what she's having. I'm your number one fan. You guys wanna see a dead body? The very idea of a bucket list. The West Wing. All from his movies.

On Saturday I was talking about Rob Reiner with friends at a party, specifically my love of Spinal Tap, and all of us were quoting it and cracking ourselves up. What a loss.

The Chicago Weather Text predicting a warm January and highs in the 60s for Christmas might just get me through this day 🌞🕶️

About to open Slack on only 3 hrs of sleep

Business idea where I take cock illustration commissions but I make them look a *little tiny* bit smaller and call it Humbler Hogs

PLP (platonic life partner) made dinner last night 🥹 everyone should have a friend who can cook!

Saw Rilo Kiley is coming to Chicago so I’m listening to them at the gym… it’s so hard not to just completely convulse and throw my ass to The Moneymaker 🤑

I don’t know if it was the lack of plot or the following experience that contributed more to my dislike of gay hockey program 🤔🤔

Visited a different Anytime Fitness™️ tonight! Didn’t have any of the machines I wanted but did have that familiar flattering fluorescent light we know and love 🥴

There are people who move through the world orienting their entire lives around what is happening in sports

Me in winter: gonna give that itch a little bity scratch 😃 My skin looking back up at me after:

I’m very ok BUT sitting at urgent care after a distracted driver hit me as I walked through a pedestrian crosswalk in Chicago last night. Prob just an ankle sprain! Could’ve been way worse. Ppl cannot look away from their phones 😠🙄 Ty @wetfromsobbing.bsky.social for springing into action 👩‍⚕️🩺⛑️

First year in a while that “Brown Noise For Sleep” fell out of my top albums for the year