My fourth grader got to bring his recorder home from school yesterday. Time he started playing his recorder this morning: 6:07 AM

Can't prove it but I'm pretty sure notifications are ruining my life

Just tried pressing this bad boy while trying to enter my office garage. Great start, happy Monday!

never has minneapolis needed to celebrate the sun coming more than at the end of winter 2026. ICE are not gone completely, but we still won, and it was incredibly cathartic to see this ceremony at mayday about protecting our neighbors, grounding why we did this work. i love this city

Went to the Minnehaha Duck Race yesterday and my best friend’s duck won 😅 The prize was a professional painting of her house, which is extra special because it’s her childhood home and they have to sell it soon. Really beautiful prize, and even better timing. I just love that city.💜

Having all the cards is, famously, not the goal in Uno.

I need to know if there even was a bear on the cognition test.

One thing you can do with the new flag that couldn't be done well with the old one is fold it into a neat triangle, just like the American flag. Here's a quick tutorial 🧵:

My coworker in the parking garage this morning: “Um, do you know your car says poop?”

I just know that Melissa and Kari would both be annoyed if the other was left out of the accolades for the wins of the 2023 session.

This is what Marco Rubio decided to do with his life: "AIDS Creeps Back in Parts of Zambia, a Year After U.S. Cuts to HIV Assistance: A once-robust HIV treatment and prevention system, credited with saving hundreds of thousands of lives, has begun to crumble..." www.nytimes.com/2026/04/25/h...

There should be a rule that if you are a Known Sports Poster you can say things like “holy fucking shit” with zero context but if you are primarily a Known Politics Poster that gets you like a two day ban

ok the Mr. Beast lawsuit, let’s go. step 1: don’t do this, or this, or this, or this

Private equity is buying up manufactured home parks &squeezing every last dime out of people in what is supposed to be an affordable means of housing. It passed with 1 GOP vote, but it stalled in the House after a GOP Rep supporting it literally walked out of committee: www.fox9.com/news/minneso...

My 3y/o on April 19 when she woke up to snow on the ground: “DID SANTA BRING PRESENTS?!?”

Schrödinger’s Strait of Hormuz

I was watching something on Peacock and when it ended it auto played The Miniature Wife. I would like the record to reflect that I did not watch that show.

During Black Maternal Health Week, Senator Clare Oumou Verbeten shares her firsthand experience of a traumatic and dangerous birth. She calls for more than apologies and safety stories, but action and policy change. Read her full op-ed in @MinnPost here: www.minnpost.com/community-vo... #bmhw26

I’ve given this a great deal of thought, trying to come up with the perfect joke for this moment, and this is what I have so far - POPE LEO: our religion teaches that this war is bad VANCE: wow, who died and made YOU head of the Catholic Church?? POPE LEO: well, you should know, you were there

one of the funniest things about Trump is his absolute disloyalty to everyone, no matter how much they have debased themselves to curry his favor. it doesn't matter what they do for him. he's perpetually 30 seconds away from tossing them under a bus and giving them a bitchy nickname on the news

My rule 4 is confirming a lot of questions raised by Rules 1-3.

It’s gonna great week for the classic “is the Pope Catholic?”

From new Hungarian Prime Minister Péter Magyar's acceptance speech tonight. This is the absolute BARE MINIMUM platform for any Democrat running for President in 2028.

I don't know how to explain to the people who pop up when creatives complain about "AI" to say there are legit uses for it just how much they sound like someone saying "Well actually fire is used to make bread" when people are talking about an organized arson ring burning down their fucking houses

This pope sometimes makes me consider becoming an un-lapsed Catholic, but then I see Catholic organizations in MN vehemently fighting against coverage for IVF and I snap back to reality.

"Conversion therapy" isn't therapy at all, it's a dangerous and destructive pseudoscience. We must protect all Minnesotans from this harmful practice, and we're committed to standing up for the LGBTQ community. 💙🏳️‍🌈

Maybe the Streisand Effect can be renamed the Streisand-Melania Effect.

Some morning sassiness from my 3 year old on the drive to daycare: 3y: My hands are cold. Me: Do you want this blanket? 3y, indignant: Not my knees are cold!!

I'm a bit of a broken record on this, but usurping the power of the purse isn't just one constitutional violation among all the many others. It is, uniquely and singularly, the death of constitutional government altogether. Game over, end of story, you now live in an autocracy.

My 8y/o at 5:43 AM while tearing into her Easter basket: “If it’s Easter, we’re gonna eat a lot of candy.”

Having to do Easter basket and egg stuff tonight after being at a DFL convention for 9 hours should be illegal. I’m bringing a resolution next time to put a stop to this.

I’m delegate to the SD33 convention today. Packed house, historic participation and an incredible number of new people. We are trying to unseat Sen. Karin Housley with our candidate Nat Smith, and take a majority in the House by winning the newly open HD33A with Angela Thompson.

And here's a great starter pack of journalists and outlets that DON'T use "A.i."! Vastly less likely than other outlets to peddle mistakes and bullshit! go.bsky.app/8cn1XfT

The NYT is exhausting me again today, so once again I encourage everyone to follow LOCAL journalists and news outlets. These folks are vastly less likely to push right wing claptrap that billionaires feel good about themselves. go.bsky.app/FzSc9z

I convinced my 10y/o son to wear a jacket to the bus stop this morning (40°). Starting the day off with a win.

The Times' 6:00am story about Trump's determination "to end the war in Iran through negotiations" is followed 26 minutes later by Trump's threat to blow up and completely obliterate "all of their Electric Generating Plants, Oil Wells, and Kharg Island (and possibly all desalinization plants!)."

Oh my god my Costco finally switched to Coke in the food court. I sometimes think there’s no way to love them more and they keep proving me wrong.

The idea of ICE being deployed to airports sends a chill down my spine. How many people will no longer feel safe traveling? What will the consequences of inuring Americans to the presence ICE agents as a part of regular life, especially ahead of the midterm elections, be?

The package also includes requirement for the Bureau of Criminal Apprehension to be involved in investigations involving a shooting by a federal agent, and a new right to sue federal agents for violations of civil rights. #mnleg

The package includes 11 total bills seeking to protect Minnesotans, including new protections for essential spaces like daycares, courts, schools, and hospitals.

Senate Democrats have advanced a substantial package of legislation protecting the civil, human, and constitutional rights of Minnesotans in response to the unprecedented abuse from federal immigration enforcement the state experienced by Operation Metro Surge. #mn

I have a legislature joke but it’s stuck in committee.

Today, I presented my bill to increase school funding via Compensatory Aid - this will bring more funds directly into the classrooms that need it most. In Judiciary, I presented my bill to ban putting minor children on eviction notices. Both bills passed in committee and are moving forward.

call me old fashioned but I don’t think anyone should have to trade for “no deporting US citizens” we should get that one for free you know

my kid came home from kindergarten today and announced she was setting a trap to catch a leprechaun. apparently other kids at school always end up with candy and treats in their annual leprechaun traps, so she’s pretty stoked to see what she gets. I am begging other parents to fucking cool it

Department of Homeland Security leaders removed top privacy officers who objected to mislabeling government records to block their public release, WIRED has learned.

Donald Trump letting you know how the authoritarian capture of the media is going, in case you missed it. Unlike other authoritarians in places like Hungary and Poland he has no worries about advertising his authoritarian take over of the media.

It’s so enraging that fascists can cause death and destruction via “policy” but when we point that out or name it we are the ones causing harm. It’s just like when we said ICE was killing people and akin to nazism and they said we were being inflammatory. NAMING VIOLENCE ISN’T THE SAME AS VIOLENCE

They blew up USAid and doomed millions to an agonizing death but a video of them being an idiot on camera is causing reputational damage

This is the f’ing way. Every one of the those wrongly detained should be suing the federal government, as well as individual members of the administration by name. It’s one of the only major avenues of recourse that might affect change in the admin’s behavior.