You had me at "stuck against the touchline". #nufc

At least we are going to be fast. Fastest front 3 in the league probably. #nufc

This is it. This is the end of art.

So long Sandro, you were great in one of the 3 years you were here, won a cup, might be forgotten but a decent player who always tried quite hard. #nufc

Olise is the most talented Englishman since Gazza. Incredible player.

Can't believe this is happening, but it's the tournament of mackems. Wonder if this will extend to the stunted Pickford.

United will be able to cover that UEFA fine by selling a midfielder to a team that finished below them in the league three times in the last four seasons. The same team that earned £20m more than them from UEFA despite getting knocked out of the competition earlier. Funny old game.

Earned significantly less than other clubs, despite going further in the tournament due to UEFA’s twisted coefficient. Then get hit with a fucking fine by UEFA because United don’t have that money. That’s where your season ticket increase cash is going. What a fucking racket.

Casemiro is a honking footballer, watching him against teams better than lower table PL must be tedious.

Not sure why Joelinton was hanging out with Kaio Jorge, but get him in man, just what NUFC needs. #nufc

dog shit country, truly

good grief

Wissa is coming back to tear this league up. At least 5 goals this season for the imminent golden boot #nufc

I really wonder if 1993-1997 would have been as mint with constant noise from parasites, paid for journalists, and a season that never ends. It wouldn't, it would have been grim. The atmosphere at SJP is now shite, and it's better than almost all other grounds. It's all linked. #nufc

Welcome move, it's one of the UK's biggest failings and always has been. But Manchester is the mid-West.

"Something just brushed past my leg!" — Luke Skywalker, #StarWars Image credit: tempestkc on Threads #LincolnMemorialReflectingPool #USA

I love this. Unmute.

Watching England is like watching someone enter data into a spreadsheet. Unbelievably tedious side.

Hope these guys have a good night

Respect to Cronaldo for honouring his suspension, even though nosferatu and Trump overturned it.

He's done it! He is reborn hallelujah #nufc

it’s very dull to talk about the money in football, and the illusory 2030 target for NUFC, BUT this Knox contract will not move the needle for NUFC whatsoever and will expire just before that. The CEO seems like a nice lad; i’m personally deeply unimpressed so far. #nufc

Shame to miss the Australia / Turkiye match. The first one played at an actual football ground, with a good surface.

All this carry on about the home top, when this abomination is around. Admittedly, the new shirt sponsor is to come. #nufc

The World Cup is bigger than ever. 1,248 players from all corners of the globe are about to take to the largest stage of them all. From Alajbegović to Yirenkyi, we’ve picked ten breakouts for you to watch. Find report cards powered by SkillCorner data for a collection of SCOUTED favourites.

#photography Muelle, Upon Tyne, Newcastle, 1952. #photographer Harry Morrison #HarryMorrison #retratos #minimalista #photooftheday

it’s genuinely scary how deeply embedded this wretched company is in the NHS, one of the least discussed scandals in the UK. The UK gov has ceded data and future leverage to people who have no interest in human beings, let alone the British public. www.reuters.com/technology/u...

foolishly watched a couple of the WC warmups yesterday. Brought to you by Turkish airlines, drinks break by gatorade, “get the shot on frame”. It’s going to be a mute button summer for the World War cup.

If shared love for a person could keep them going, KK would live to 500. The greatest person ever associated with the club, my absolute hero and if I'm honest the only person who has ever said what he thinks the club can be, and convinced me. Love that man, I hope he does not suffer. #nufc

This arsenal side is excellent, they'll be great for years. But for Gabriel to blow it is full on karma, the man's an utter prick.

Following the acceptance of an episode using AI guests, Question Time evolves to its final form.

The pricing for our friendly against Everton is nothing short of a disgrace. A standard seat behind the goal will cost an adult £70+ once fees are included. A reminder, this is a Friendly, kicking off at 5:15pm midweek 90+ miles away. Football has a serious problem.

If that Italian prick is to be believed, it's an average but necessary deal for NUFC. After the sell on to Everton, it pays for the new keeper and the UEFA fine. Always good to move a disinterested player on, he'll have a great start for that club but he'll be judged in 2-3 games each season. #nufc

Djed Spece over Hall is genuinely mental like. Hall isn't the finished article but that's an insult, just ongoing London bias or brainworms #nufc

Must we keep holding our politicians to such impossible standards?

VAR doing what it's been used for in the UK, fixing games for "big clubs". Celtic are an utter joke.

OK, this is kind of amazing?

Note to NUFC, this is how you should have commemorated Willie McFaul. #nufc

No way a club comes out of this insanely bad run with a comfortable win. Really poor football again for most of it, but happy for Howe. Doubt he'll be here in November but really pleased he had a day in the sun. #nufc

Cordero got two goals today. Weird day where things are coming up Millhouse. #nufc

Interesting that so many tickets are still available so close to kickoff. I realise the team is poor, the football shite, but really disappointing. #nufc

Newcastle United’s dreadful form can be traced back not to the sale of Alexander Isak, but the moment they opted to do precisely fuck all to commemorate the life of Willie McFaul. What an absolute shitshow that was. He was at the club for *decades*, lads.

Good luck to the lads on the field but it's an utterly guileless starting 11, Howe is sleepwalking here. #nufc

I still think Howe is cooked in the long-run, but they could recapture some good will with a couple of things. Change the coaching setup ASAP (Trippier as bonus coach would appeal to me). Second, get Gordon sold by the end of the season. It would show intent and get some fans back on side. #nufc

Now NUFC is back in the groove of being shite, top of the league is completely irrelevant. But if any player deserves to choke a huge title lead it's Gabriel, a real throwback cheat. Should have been sent off at SJP or conceded a blatant pen; should have walked today #nufc

Just not another humiliation lads, please. #nufc

May seem outlandish in the era of conspiracy theories, but maybe in future the club can make sure players are vaccinated against fucking mumps? What a ridiculous industry, could cost the club millions. #nufc