dogs can be left unattended with a whole costco rotisserie chicken surely you will not regret leaving dogs unattended with half of a costco rotisserie chicken we will keep an eye on this empty costco rotisserie chicken bag for you

< bark.wav > :3

who wants to roast marshmallows and play music around a campfire?

finally finished outer wilds that ending is going to stick with me for a while. already wishing i could play it again for the first time

> meditate until next loop <

she got me a synthesizer for christmas 🥺💖🥰

let dogs play electronic music!! 😤

it’s beginning to look a lot like synthmas

be careful who you invite to your holiday party!!!

Average trans polycule Christmas party

and Tiny Tim, who would NOT die, had eaten the plums that were in the icebox

twelve maids a-milking eleven maids a-milking ten maids a-milking nine maids a-milking eight maids a-milking seven maids a-milking six maids a-milking fiveeeeeee golden rings four maids a-milking three maids a-milking two maids a-milking and a maid milking in a pear tree

And Tiny Tim who did NOT go gentle into that good night Raged, raged against the dying of the light

opening the entire bonne maman advent calendar in one night is all fun and games until the jam hangover the next morning

and tiny tim, who did NOT die, beat on, a boat against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the christmas past.

so *this* is christmas

need a girl to fudge me only i didn't say fudge i said the f dash dash dash word

it's just 73 dolls in maid costumes.

525,600 days of christmas

twelve maids a-milking eleven maids a-milking ten maids a-milking nine maids a-milking eight maids a-milking seven maids a-milking six maids a-milking fiveeeeeee golden rings four maids a-milking three maids a-milking two maids a-milking and a maid milking in a pear tree

it's just some random letters from where i smushed the keyboard. they mean nothing

family learning not to ask followup questions like: “what did you get in the mail?” and “oh what’s on the stickers?” and “where are you going to put a sticker that says ‘walkable cities & suckable titties’”

family is staying with us for christmas might have to rethink the original christmas gift plan: biting

tgirl top call her #! the way she bangs

Explain your username Just go to the website 👩‍🎤🎸💗✨

wrapping presents gets harder when the adderall wears off and you lose your object permanence

explain your username 🎤 i was not feeling creative when i picked it and sometimes simplicity works.

explain your username 🎤 just go to the website

ranked competitive riker maneuvering

holy shit the quesarito is back at taco bell it’s a christmas miracle

so *this* is christmas

the thing about the pushback against asking for pronouns by a lot of binary trans people is that if it were a completely normalized thing in that *everyone* was asked pronouns that’d be more fine, but when it’s “oh hey we noticed a tranny let’s do pronoun circles” that’s when it feels bad

that look that says “check your phone NOW because we need to discuss this conversation we’re both overhearing”

just keep walking past the baggage claim leave it all at the airport get in a cab go home save a lot on therapy

few things more terrifying than seeing “photo rejected - see agent” when coming back into the country it’s okay, thank goodness, think it was my glasses

estrogen autoinjector eurorack module

I think if you’re a top you should get a government stipend to keep an anxious socially awkward art bottom in a dog cage at home so they can focus on producing the most beautiful degenerate pornography the mind can imagine

in preparation for landing we ask that your puppygirls be turned off and properly stowed

jet laggot

non-dairy queamer

“quick nap” turned into sleeping the whole flight, my sleep schedule is gonna be fucked

okay, i think i like this lil camera 💕

if you don’t like fat bitches you don’t even like women oh a woman has put on fat in a feminine way and ur not attracted to her anymore? go fuck a twink, leave the women to the real fans buddy

by watching “the joe rogan podcast: the spotify video experience” on the inflight entertainment system, you have agreed to give every other passenger one free punch

i escaped samsara and all i got were these bangin’ tits

i love the term "firmware". "not as hard as hardware, not as soft as software". goldilocks-ass ontology

woah, they’re going airplane mode

i am a homosexual dog thing

dude in front of us blocked the aisle for 10 minutes to attempt to trade seats with someone and is also wearing a bitcoin hat. rancid cybertruck energy. … begging dorley hall to take a late admission