side note that I should probably make another Ao3 account for leaving kudos and comments bcuz I had a stalking issue that makes me uncomfortable with using my original one

i got bit by the boywife bug archiveofourown.org/works/800788...

Something that's really funny about their dynamic to me is that I think Kyouji is more than capable of running circles around the barely legal with a crush on him but he doesn't use his Powers for evil. often.

working on the panel redraw thing and the one of Kyouji eating a cheesy something with Masanori gets me thinking about how that scene is a great opportunity to see Kyouji with A Guy contrasted with how he is with Satomi, Love Of His Life

guy who took a nap

"i'm going to get a good grade in fucking satomi-kun, something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve—"

it never goes anywhere less than squeaky clean but the part of Famiresu where they're calling eachother nephew/uncle/father to other people still feels diabolically horny to me

suffering from being old because I struggle to not call them kyosato regardless of the top/bottom orientation

satokyo creampies. cream in that old man and then eat it out afterwards, satomi

theoretically I think it would be satisfying because the world of differences between a good choir boy and a drop out doing sex work might create similar results to canon and i think that's kinda what it's all about. changing things to see what's still the same

"what if Kyouji was meaner" hideous. vile. disgusting. a disgrace to idea-havers everywhere "what if Kyouji was a restaurant employee with a bit of tism" amazing, groundbreaking, tearful applause

I know Kyouji can't cook but for some reason I think it would be cute if he was a restaurant worker. If he was really absurdly passionate. if he was an r/kitchenconfidential type who was really serious about plating and chopping technique

and what if i want satomi to do profound violence to protect kyouji instead.

the only canon-adjacent version of this I can imagine is Kyouji getting grumpy from trying to quit smoking and being so horrified when he says something mildly sharp to Satomi one morning while running late to a shift at work thay he immediately starts again

昨日の無配｡･*･:≡(　ε:) 👻のナリ夕さんです👻 狂聡です👻 ⚠️ﾀﾋネタになります⚠️ もらってくださってありがとうございました！！ 全部で8Pあります😆

genuinely awful yakuza boss Kyouji and fresh recruit Satomi

I wish I had more au ideas for karafami but I think I'm so genuinely content with their dynamic that I'm afraid to tinker with it too much and risk losing the parts I enjoy

alternate universe where Kyouji and Satomi get to have packages delivered to them with "Kyouji and Satomi Oka" in the name field

every time I pack an order for a customer who insists on doing married couple names in the address field I always think it would be funny to see how long it would take straight people to get mad if queer ppl did it

my favorite boomer good morning gifs to send are the ones that are inappropriately specific

Satomi worried about Kyouji not taking him seriously after he's slept with him and let him see him w his ass in the air (Kyouji will be as goofy as he always is and Satomi will take it in as poor faith as possible)

3914 is so funny. 'quick! make him permanently yours while he's young & stupid, before he fully realizes that what you're doing together isn’t actually okay/has serious consequences & flees in horror. act now or you may never have him!' and the 'him' in question is the 39-year-old.

satomi on tiptoes for a kiss. kyouji’s body blocking him from view entirely in the karaoke room. kyouji’s hand spanning the small of satomi’s back. two pairs of shoes lined up in kyouji’s entryway. satomi’d be so easy to pick up. big tongue in his mouth. finger sucking. “I’m not gonna put it in.”

imagine being Narita Kyouji and despite everything you are, you have this perfect boy from a happy family looking at you as if you hung the moon

it's extremely funny to me they dare to have that kind of chemistry in front of the entire matsuribayashi's salads. crazy stuff

Good night archiveofourown.org/works/80080611

the only crime of the live action Karaoke Iko is making the kumicho hot. that's diabolical

idk if it's because I'm a pervert or not but the but the bit leading up to the omamori gift in the live action feels so obscene to me. "next time we meet I'll cheer you up" and he literally shows up the next day at his school

for the the live action, I always really like the bit with Satomi asking for a new umbrella (because his feels childish) just for his parents to buy him a new umbrella that's the same as the one he had. I think that does a really good job at hinting to Satomi's growing pains and family disconnect

details from the manga that are so important to me

rewatching the LA and I'm always on the verge of gasping by how much this man flirts with this child

Im really feeling it now, Mr.Krabs

thinking about Satomi growing into his role, his looks, learning how to pretend to be the wife other men covet because he can't have anything else, he had to give up his dreams of anything else when he got married at 14 to pay off a debt that wasn't his

my likes keep disappearing so if it's not just on my end I'm sorry 😭

I was going to make a joke about how alcohol probably hasn't burned Kyouji's throw in decades but since he has a low alcohol tolerance I could actually imagine Satomi being confused that Kyouji isn't much better with it than him

i have been possessed by 3914 arranged marriage boywife AU

I was worried for a bit I was fixating too much and that I should try to think abt other stuff but I saw the government beefing w Cardi B and decided to keep disassociating

disclosure that I'm a terrible person but enjoying the idea of Satomi coming home from school or whatever and his parents just being like "so uh, we made some poor decisions and... you're getting married!"

I've thought abt it more and imagined that this happens because Kyouji just got out of jail and, rather than a reminder tattoo, the kumicho decides he'll make better decisions if they don't just impact himself. assigned husband, grow up

S-Satomi in shiromuku...

taking them at their word that it's OK to use. fun for the artist types

I dont believe in top/bottom discourse anymore for Satomi and Kyouji its all about the vibes

please consider this + some omegaverse with Satomi finally begging for just Kyouji's fingers (at first) because he's going insane

I feel like I'm technically more primed to be into 3914 based off of my shipping history but I have to admit I have a raging boner for 18 year old Satomi. he's so dreamy for no reason

sent a funny reel to a friend and am now reflecting on how the most unrealistic part was a 35 year old man being a father of a 16 year old in 2026

I'm so happy to have got ppl thinking abt arranged marriage kyosato. truly an underrated way to mash these two together entirely too soon

the best part abt arranged marriage 3914 kyst is that satomi undeniably SUCKS at being a housewife but kyouji is so endeared by him anyways. coming home to his roommate that he babysits who hates him (he's actually just tsundere and confused by his all-consuming teenage lust)

kara is so dangerous because if you read kara not only does it get you into fami but you're very at risk of becoming a wymhead.

satomi: you're a thirsty little flower. i have to water you. i have to use my cum. kyouji: okay 💗 yay 💗

my version of the LA movie doesn't have subtitles for the choir song in the beginning so when I saw the subs for the lyrics on the tube site upload I was like "oh wow, how thematically relevant"