A thick piece of sourdough bread, toasted in the air fryer with honey cinnamon butter is a literal mood changer… 🧡🐝🍞

This weekends 90s movie that I watched wayyyyy too many times that helped shape me… - Drive Me Crazy with Melissa Joan Hart and Adrian Grenier Damn I love a solid fake dating, boy next door trope! 😂🙃🧡

My SIL made a snotty comment about me smoking before lunch yesterday and I guess I internalized it more than I thought… so I didn’t smoke before dinner tonight and I triggered a flare of some kind and its full body…. Now I remember why I smoke before I eat. It’s not always for funsies folx

Polyamory. Wonderful for when you want two people telling you, you can’t have just weed and iced coffee for breakfast… 😂😂🙃🥰

It’s Black Friday… which means no buying from corporations… at all. The deal isn’t that good anyway and they’ll have the same sale in a week. Make their Black Friday and Cyber Monday sales suck! You know who they are. Support local! Support small! Support POC and women owned! Speak with your money!

The American Eskimo dog on the dog show just destroyed me. I can’t watch dogs anymore… football it is!

Current mood: for everyone going into what feels like shark invested waters for your meal ✊🏻 For everyone celebrating differently again this year. I’m thankful for you. Keep going. While we have so much to be thankful for, Thanksgiving during what feels like the fall is wild… 🧡

I got stickers with my edibles!! 😂😂 I am straight up delighted! Happy Green Wednesday all my fellow gardeners! 😂😂

Just because I know I’m human and therefore going to make mistakes…. I really hate making them…

Good morning loves! It’s Wednesday which means if you’re an American, today is hopefully your last day of work this week too! One more day before Turkey and pissing off your racist brother! Have a good day all!! 🧡🧡🧡

I've seen people say that getting attached to ChatGPT is like "believing the stripper really loves you", but that's not true. It's more like believing that the dryer personally composed that little jingle on a lonely sockless night just to win your affections.

Pssst!!! PWHL is back! Tonight’s game is almost over but there’s another one tomorrow at 7! In the US we can watch them all for free on YouTube!!

I have been listening to and singing when I can’t listen to Elizabeth Taylor… I think my coworker is going to slap me if she just randomly hears “I’d cry my eyes violet. ELIZABETH TAYLOR”! I am a menace and I don’t care 😅😂😂😂😂

Not gunna lie… no one needs more showgirl variants…

I don’t know if it’s because it’s Monday or if it’s the Monday of a short week… but I cannot keep my eyes open… I want to fall back to sleep so badly! 😂😅

What if the true meaning of Christmas is supporting small businesses so the oligarchs have a very shitty season? 😚

My Eras Tour onesie got here…. Now try to get me out of it…. 😂😂😂🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

Wow… per my previous post that I really messed up 😂🙃 book club Friendsgiving was amazing! So much good food! So much good wine but even better conversation and people. January’s book is The Forest of Vanishing Stars by Kristen Hamel!

A little high. A little drunk. Got to talk about Dungeon Crawler Carl… about to watch turkey and sweet potatoes…. Book Club Friendsgiving fucking rocks!!

DM: The orange fascist lurks in his lair, hunched behind his massive desk, revelling in his stolen power. His acolytes hiss at you as you approach. What does your human bard do -- MAMDANI: Active perception check. DM: ...that's a natural 20 MAMDANI: Let's fucking go. <FLUTE TRILL>

I’m so sad about the Speak Now cardigan selling out so fast… I have been waiting and I had a client arrive right at 11 and I missed it 🙃😅💜

Wicked For Good was so damn good. And I cried the whole way through. 1000% recommend! 💚💞

Life hack! Be nice to the guy putting butter on your popcorn at the movie theater! You get extra butter! 😂😂😂

I chose to wear my new ivy sweatshirt to work and it’s so warm. We literally have freezing fog here today… and I haven’t had to turn on my under desk heater yet! 😂😂 #nowimcoveredinyou

share a TV series you've seen from beginning to end more than once 📺

You’re not fat. You’re squishy. And squishy is amazing to cuddle! 🧡🧡🧡

Dammit Taylor… I was so good yesterday! I’m blaming today on being sick 😂🙃🫶🏻🧡

Look at what degrees the DOE just removed from their definition of “professional”. Then thing of who does those jobs… Hint: it’s women… now go read Chapter 11 of Project 2025… and finally if you’re one of the people who told me this wasn’t going to happen and I was crazy… go fuck yourself

before I had kids I used to be a little judgy about kids in public in their pajamas. like how hard is it to dress a toddler? lol. lmao

Just really processed the fact that for the first time in almost 36 years I went to see a doctor this morning and she didn’t mention my weight a single time. And in fact she removed the “morbid obesity” diagnosis my last doctor stuck me with. I got talked to like a human and a game plan made… huh 🤔

It’s the wrong time of year for me to spend another $150 on myself. But the sweatpants and zippered hoodie are amazing!!! 🧡🧡🧡

Vaccinated and ready to cause chaos! Let’s go! 😂😂😂

That wasn’t a punch… he grabbed his face mask…. I want to know what was said though!

Solidarity to all my “know-it-alls” the over observant, hyperfixated ones who have had that thrown in your face by every single “friend” you lost! While we know we’re better off, it doesn’t make it hurt less! 😘🙃🧡

CONSERVATIVES: same sex marriage is an abomination against God ALSO CONSERVATIVES: age is just a number and that number is 15 for us

What the hell is roughing the snapper?!?

Someone has been papering my neighborhood in KKK flyers. I’m so fucking disgusted and disturbed. Thats not my community. I will not let the hate be louder.

Just heard Pittsburghers described as “aggressively helpful” and damn if I don’t fit that remark 😂😅

The swemo version of mirrorball… that’s all I have to say 😂🧡🫶🏻

At least the Riverhounds showed up tonight!! They’re advancing to the USL Championship final!!! Yessss!! Go soccer hooligans!! 🖤💛

Drink some water you dehydrated basic human house plants! 🪴 💧

Pat McAfees yinzer accent is way more pronounced today. Being home does that to you 😂😂😂 HAIL TO PITT!! 💙💛

Damn my city is pretty. Let’s Go Pitt!!!!

Curly fries and chicken tendies at 1:20 in the morning is fucking bomb… just saying…

the bookshop smells of ink fresh paper and coffee of new words and the oil of an escalator i am perched in a second story window in the sun as it moves too quickly toward the horizon between my lips sit the melodic phrases of Billy Collins the sunlight is tickling my neck i am peaceful sad and spent

IF! YOU! DONT! RESPECT! SEX! WORKERS! I! DONT! RESPECT! YOU!!!!

I thought I was done changing my clothes in the car on the way out after I left my parents house when I was in highschool… and then my parents became my babysitter and I have to change my clothes after I drop my kid off or in the car 😂😂😂 Sorry Momma you do not need to see my crop top…

They knew they knew they knew the whole time That I was onto something The family the pure greed the Christian chorus line They all said nothing Bloods thick but nothing like a payroll Bet they never spared a prayer for my soul

*taps mic* If Dems are in “the files,” then they should be prosecuted too. I don’t give a damn how important they are, how much money they have, or what their politics are. If they are in there, PROSECUTE THEM!! It's not complicated. All we want is equal justice. NO ONE is above the law. ⚖️

In honor of my ride or die with questions’ birthday, listen to Wild Things by Alessia Cara. It’s her in song form and she is the most amazing woman in the world. 🧡🧡🧡