there are too many big mac salad recipes and no one knows how to make a roux

when my grandmother saw lee harvey oswald get shot on live tv she said “he shot him!” and my dad does a great impression of it

i can’t think of a movie i want to see less than Anyone But You but i think it’s good for the economy

i just found a maldon salt flake in my cleavage

Just finished this week's stretch of bargaining. We weren't expecting to have to fight tooth and nail for basic things like not being replaced by AI and remaining protected from online harassment. Please share and tag GO Media to show your support!

Carl Sagan said, "if you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe," but if Neil deGrasse Tyson said that we'd tell him to shut the fuck up

something unwholesome about seeing timothee chalomet’s face while hearing “nights in white satin” but that’s exactly the kind of perversion i’ve come to expect from fragrance commercials

kevin mcdonald is to KITH as michael palin is to monty python

california has got to stop putting cancer warnings on everything it’s bumming me out

a note to Washington Post readers: On Dec. 7, we ask you to respect our walkout by not crossing the picket line: For 24 hours, please do not engage with any Post content. That includes our print + online news stories, podcasts, videos, games and recipes.

🫡

enough

i needed to hear this

I was spared, but we lost a lot of good people today and if you wanted to donate to help cushion the blow for them that’d be amazing gofund.me/f47e1c18

If you have the chance to tell your friend that Henry Kissinger has died just before that friend tells you that he’s on mushrooms, I can say from experience that you should take it.

YOU THERE, BOY! WHAT DAY IS IT??

it’s moment like this, when i have created something beautiful, that i miss twitter the most

i’m rewatching the sopranos and there’s a scene where junior is eating chocolate-covered almonds except he’s just eating the chocolate and spitting out the almonds on a plate and it’s the funniest thing i’ve ever seen. AI is not capable of this masterful gag.

i miss her 💔🦃

traditional thanksgiving canadian

my bf just referred to tomorrow as my “special day” and it was sincere and he’s right

listen to me and listen to me good: dip a dorito in creme fraiche

this is your annual reminder to not give anyone whiskey stones this christmas

it bugs me that my cat doesn’t like shrimp

unexpected jollibee encounter (my first)

this is the most boring app in the world

what rich people eat i guess

hooking my dad up to a lie detector and asking “DO YOU MOURN THE CLOSURE OF NOMA?” interrogation-style

i told my bf this isn’t doing too good and he said “oh really i wonder why”

grapes have three options: 1. raisins 2. wine 3. die young

it’s amazing how one small, stupid, talentless man can do so much damage

Jezebel's work was more vital than ever. A statement from the staffers unionized with @gmgunion.bsky.social and @wgaeast.bsky.social about "economic headwinds"

this sucks. jezebel forever ✊

wyld edibles hit harder per mg

starting a new job tomorrow? have you considered hiding your macbook charger from yourself?

let the golden bachelor do polyamory

the lighting is bad but the steak is good

made chocolate chip cookies with pecans

great news

A skilled editor would’ve suggested you use a word other than “seminal”

“someone loaded this dishwasher like an asshole” she said, to a totally empty house

“choose wisely” is so ominous

i was trying to approximate what posting is for someone