I don’t usually check my Instagram, but when I do, I realize that Botox has certainly made its way to Knoxville, Tennessee

The day of the blocked FG TD

JORDAN DAVIS, DAWG

Rubbing my hands together waiting for @shutdownfullcast.bsky.social after dark

*to the tune of night moves* “NIGHT FETCH”

Went to my local suburban Atlanta “downtown” looking for dinner and there happens to be a Hispanic street festival going on. A million chorizo tacos + lime please

Just finished the sopranos for the first time, and y’all weren’t lying about that ending

Cal Ripken Jr has missed 3,765 consecutive games

I’m at a packers/wisconsin expat bar and they’re losing to MTSU. It’s a tense environment

Jag E-Type, especially the 70’s models, are just art. Beautiful.

Guess who got told he needs less food at the vet today

Y’all will never understand how fucking awesome it was seeing Stetson Bennett throwing to Ladd McConkey, the ultimate white boy autumn

Putting !!!LEGAL LOOPHOLE!!! In your commercial is fantastic

Putting !!!LEGAL LOOPHOLE!!! In your commercial is fantastic

i met anubis in the realm of the underworld, big strong guy by the way, had a dog’s head, i’m not so sure about that. and he said to me, mr president, you’ve got the heaviest soul we’ve ever weighed down here. can you believe it? they’ve never seen a soul that heavy in all of duat

GUNNER STOCKTON

Gotta love it

Pick 1, 12 team ppr. Tell me I suck

Teaching him about RPOs

What’s up big guy

Always schedule your vacations Saturday-Saturday so you don’t get the bends when you’re thrust directly back to work

Laura Loomer got asked about one of my tweets in a deposition resulting in a shouting match and demanding an investigation over whether I'm actually Bill Maher

Lewis Cine was an underrated member of this squad, all the love went to the DL and LBs. Dude was cracking skulls at safety

I had a bad day. So I’m doing what all normal people do when they have a bad day. I’m watching the 2022 UGA-Bama natty

This is the craziest my dog has ever looked

Put that little maybach truck in the garage youtu.be/M0qiZHV4E3U?...

Wait, does Drake have another kid like Kendrick said during that beef?

This may be telling about my previous life experience but you can tell a lot about a person about their opinion of Honey Buns™️

Walked into the ocean and forgot my car keys were in my pocket

When you’re going to the beach tomorrow

The Braves are the all time winningest team in MLB history in the state of Tennessee

Not bad

The king Dan Carlin

The Chick-fil-A Wanter™️

This rabbit that lives outside my house is incredibly lucky my dog is fat

This is what my YouTube searches are like after 5 beers

Do y’all see this shit? Do you see how he positioned himself before the catch to be in the optimal position to throw? The cannon? The no sell by a kid that has played 4 games in the bigs at 3rd? It’s art, you understand?

Clipse album has me dancing like Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder

Why does this have to be out of stock

Don’t bother me, gotta get in the zone

If I don’t like a movie I just say the pacing is bad. Don’t know what it means, who cares

Heading to my favorite sushi place tonight, aka the place where I order 3 orders of pork gyoza and the waitstaff make fun of me

New toy goofin

Joined a golf simulator league, don’t think my 133 will be winning this week

Idk who this is but it isn’t Kirby