ngl, molly is the only thing that's really helped me make any progress at all healing the internal fear of being loved that i grew up with (not explaining) like, it's not a replacement for doing therapy and healing work on your own, but goddamn it can be like a wrecking ball for some internal walls

unfair that my skin should be so resistant to being marked many have tired their best, but few have managed to make one stick for more than a day, and most fade in minutes :\

I look like this after one of the best weekends of my life, if you even care 🙂‍↕️

what a weekend raving with loved ones and friends, living our best lives, & shining on the dance floor i love you, @emma.meangirls.online you give my life so much joy and inspire my growth, while calming my anxious heart by doing nothing more than just being you thank you for everything you are 💞

my body is a machine that converts everyday normal scenarios into cortisol

I think I'm cute enough to party,

inexplicably this is one of my favorite photos ever taken of me 🎱 (yes, i made this shot 😤)

women,. ,

i have too many sources of dysphoria at once. as soon as i have my new insurance activated, i gotta start a surgery speedrun, this shit is seeping into and fucking up every corner of my life now. it can't continue. i deserve joy, not… this

welp, it's official! this girl is no longer unemployed starting mid next month!!!

house hunters international in the hotel room before going out, like a classy lady

look, i'm not saying i like this thing, but while it's still around, i kinda like what T has done for me there

polycules are just the modern generations' recreations of extended families and that's a good thing, and i will not be explaining further at this time

when u say I'm in a transgenderism death cult, this is who ur talking about. pshh, get real

ugh. my brain is screaming at me. why is my brain screaming at me?

the people who hate us are feeling more free to say what they think plainly recently but it gives me comfort and hope that there are cis people who are happy to see me in my local neighborhood spots, and noticeably light up when entering the room

its been a minute, but it's time once again Krystal Swords returns to the stream TONIGHT at 8pm EST !!!! new three hour long stream !!! bangin tunes !!! emotional moments !!! kash patel being pantsed in front of a live studio audience !!!

slightly worried & somewhat scared that i am becoming sex-adverse and i don't know why

do fail learn adjust repeat

when is it acceptable to leave the bathroom door open while pissing with someone else in the room/home? only when dating? with super close friends? always?

sorry - kinda crashing out a bit… or more than a bit. idk.

like most things that build character and encourage healing, sitting in the discomfort sucks and i hate it

ive said it to her a bunch in person but i wanna do it here too: happy birthday @emma.meangirls.online !!! every hour i get to spend with you is something I'll remember forever you deserve to be surrounded by love and joy, and honestly you bring those things in spades to the people around u

i think it would be cool if more drugs were legal, accessible, and had sufficient understanding and education around to foster a safe environment

really looking forward to this weekend, when i will finally be held through the whole night after too long without 😌🥰

it's taken me a bit to get things into words, because the past week has honestly been overwhelming for me. but i was consistently filled with joy every time i'd even just steal a glance in @emma.meangirls.online direction, and see the excitement, joy and love so plainly written on her face

this all isn't the comforting life-affirming news i needed today

I was too busy during @emma.meangirls.online 's birthday to make this post but now that we're back, I want to share a bit about one of my best friends. Emma is truly one of the most incredible women I know. She's beautiful, funny, and brilliant. I have never met someone with as much (1/4)

mezcal is tequila bratting.

oh no the rest of the staff at this bar are trying to convert me into a mezcal girlie. a mezgal, if you where lol

ngl, i kinda love it when i catch cishet dudes showing each other affection and saying they love each other like. dudes rock, y'all

but, hey, i'm kinda cute about it, right?

serotonin depleted and with compromised self-confidence probably isn't the best state to try and shoot my shot in, but here i am… at the bar she works at, faking it until i make it?

tired of dissociating alone at home maybe i will dissociate alone at the bar instead

back from what was without a doubt not just the best birthday but the single best trip of my life spending a week in paradise surrounded by the most gorgeous transsexual women on earth, all of whom cherished me (and i them) has made my heart full beyond measure i have truly never felt more loved 🥲

sometimes you just wanna be held, tenderly and sweetly, y'know?

need to find a way to short-circuit my self-image back into the positive feedback loop i fell into the wrong one somehow

trans people: i don't recommend freaking out every time some whackjob in a state legislature tries to make something about you illegal, state level politicians are explicitly introducing legislation that will not pass to win points with their wackjob constituents and terrorize you

sorry that i was hot and that made you ignore the fact that i am actually very weird and off-putting until you realized it wasn't an act i do for tee-hee's

i joke about being autistic and, like, yeah, it's funny but it's also VERY real and i have difficulties that make it hard to form connections with some people, which sucks, because they're not bad people, but they're just way more exhausting for me and i lose my ability to self-regulate effectively

if a spanish speaking person tells me they're pansexual, i just assume they really like bread

48 hours ago I was lying naked by a pool drinking a Modelo and surrounded by beautiful women and now I’m in four hours of meetings and I have never hated capitalism more in my life.

lmao, marking this day on my calendar my first "u up?" vibe text from a dude

god it's good to be home tho 😴

"you must suffer before you can feel the smallest mote of joy, and if you do not feel happiness in the suffering, you are broken" is such an evil ideology, and only harms people we are not meant to live that way

goggling how to undo a catholic childhood

ok so i skipped a few to not annoy everyone but i'm counting this airport marg last

dysphoria is a fuck and this dick is killing me the longer it holds on