You, a neophyte: "I can't believe that in 2025 we're still arguing about the efficacy of not voting vs lesser-evil voting in general elections" Me, a freshman and Al Gore supporter at Grinnell College in November 2000: "Ohhh, my sweet summer child"

YESSSSSSS I was concerned when I saw that there was a Cave of Two Lovers Saga that we wouldn't see this, but WotC delivered, good job!

Ahem. Michael Scott? Thank you, Michael Scott

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I suppose it's too late for "this is incredibly illegal", huh

COUNT I Kat Abughazaleh did, while law enforcement was in heated pursuit, paint what appeared to be the entrance to a cave on a sheer rock wall, causing law enforcement to forcibly bonk into said wall. COUNT II The same thing on a different wall, but then a train came out and ran us over???

Thanks, I hate it

"But you can drive up it! They have a conveyor and everything!" I believe this is a *JeffGoldblumJurassicPark.gif* moment for people dumb enough to do it in Winter.

Oh no. They really did it. They blew it up! Damn you WotC! Damn you to hell! #NoteSagaOnLeft #ImNotCryingYoureCrying

Why is everybody talking about Isaac Chotiner agai--*searches* Oh. Ohhh. This is gonna be good. *gets jumbo popcorn bucket*

This phenomenon always fascinates me. Like I know it's an ideological objection rather than a fiscal one ("I get to say how I spend my money, not the government") but seriously... just pay your damn taxes and quit whining. (Challenge Rating: Impossible)

The hierarchy of transport options when visiting a medium-to-large city is Transit > Walking > Rideshare > Rental Car. I have had to violate this hierarchy repeatedly this year on trips and I hate myself

Remember, bears fans: the Saints are hot garbage, so the competence you are seeing on display right now is at least 40% fraudulent

I mean, we clearly *should* be until we get our act together

*Brad explains the infield fly rule to G* G: "... I have no idea what you just said." B: "that means it's working as intended"

Retained "just in case"

Me, rooting for the team in the city in which i actually live, after said team has vanquished the team from my hometown:

Blegh. Let's go Brewers i guess

Cinnamon Raisin bagel, plain cream cheese. I KNOW I KNOW but in my defense pumpernickel is my *second* favorite kind of bagel. (At least I don't butter them like DLW does. Gott in Himmel.)

Who hurt you

*looks around furtively*

Cool cool cool cool cool. Are we ready to spin off Div I sports into their own entities independent of the schools yet or what

In fairness, as someone who works with both fiche and film daily, Microfiche is terrible and the sooner its name is blotted out the better

"Huh, maybe since this is a best of 5 series I can look into going to one of the games at AmFa--" *clocks ticket prices* "as I was saying, maybe I can watch the game with some other FIBs-in-exile at someone's house"

A legit question all right thinking cubs fans should demand answers to. We don't want to make it worse!

LETS GO CUBBIES *clap clap clapclapclap* #FlyTheW

HOW IS THIS REAL COME ON

Oh good, I was worried that the records managers weren't going to have anything to complain about from this event. That was silly

It's got the mix of authoritarianism and rank stupidity that we've come to expect from this administration so... tracks

Hey look, "new argument not to enlist in the armed forces because of the logical conclusion of this line of thought" just dropped

I almost feel bad for the Mets for completely collapsing like they did over the second half of the season, but then I remember they are the Mets, have a giant payroll this year, and have done nothing in their 60+ years to deserve my pity. Eff 'em. #GoCubsGo

My cousin's son is a senior this year and is applying to *18* schools for the reasons discussed in this. EIGHTEEN! I applied to eight in 1999 and people thought I was crazy. (Yes, the common app is better now etc. BUT STILL.)

Family Miracle Leave Act, obv. Make sure you fill out your forms before you are assumed into heaven or you'll be docked pay

Caleb Williams is... not ass? I kind of don't know how to feel about this (though the second half is still a thing, it is the Bears)

Um... D? Is this a trick question? (Similarly, Region A is... dire)

Is there a slaughter rule available for the last 15 games of a season, asking for 2.7 million friends

I hope nobody finds my tweets about how the Bears suck and sends them to my employer demanding my termination for speaking ill of the dead

That's right. Elder Millennials: we're not crazy, we're just profoundly depressed! And will do tech support for the rest of our family until we die! WOOOOOOOO

I've seen most of the true classics in the quotes, so here's a (relatively) recent fave of mine:

Not even a day later I am completely exhausted with the reputation-washing of this dude by the mainstream media. As the man once said, you do not, in fact, 'have to hand it to him'

Other people get this agitated about Brontosaurus, right? To the point where your wife and child pretend not to know you when visiting the Field Museum because you're ranting about it? Just me and the paleontologists then? Righto, I'll be over here on my soapbox from Sinclair Oil

Ahhh, there we go. I was starting to feel hope about the Bears' season, like a chump

The Bears are...playing...competent football?? What is... when did... am I having a stroke right now

Hey! I'm plenty supportive. Yelling at the volunteer refs about their obvious visual impairment counts, right

I mean, is he wrong?

Surely, they had it coming. They only had themselves to blame.

I threw up in my mouth a little bit.

Not me with a Library/Archives/Records-themed Esper Deck using windfall effects as a victory condition, why would I think about this card #NotBiased

My conviction to not spend money in Florida while these clowns have a death grip on power intensifies.

This isn't a local problem. My wife has lived in WI for 18 years and still is seen as a New Englander by most people here. I barely count as Midwest stock because I'm from Chicago and therefore suspect

Let the record show that I was in Chicago this very weekend, AND I brought my family and my dog, and none of us were murdered even ONCE.* *Except on the cost of parking downtown, amirite