Who up wishin they had a sugar re-post daddy

Not sure what's the worst thing going on here.

"What's your favourite part of a woman's body?" Kidneys, obviously.

I'm the kind of guy who will be in a high-speed chase with the police, and still use my indicators.

Guys, I made it! I'm now a terrorist on all accounts of Trump. Call me ISIS, because I'm the bomb.

That explains a couple of things.

Her stomach hurts from dessert. Alas, sore bae.

ⓘ 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘻𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘈𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘢. 𝘗𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘴𝘶𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘳.

If you go through your day and one person ghosts you, then you just got ghosted. If you go through life and everybody ghosts you, you're just an asshole.

Small talk? That's when I talk to short people?

Maybe the rapture was the friends we made along the way

Guys, I have been raptured and I'm glad to report that Charlie Kirk is not here.

I guess republican men wanted to take it in the throat, in remembrance of Charlie.

I sparkled my Fuck You. Always be petty ready, protect your peace.

My house had a hairball.

no new pictures, where are you at mentally?

I've lost a lot of *weight *will to live

Live Laugh Lace the communion wine

Epstein is probably the only contractor that Trump paid.

you guys just make me giggle

I'd like social gatherings more if it didn't have people, or was a gathering, and maybe not social as well.

See no evil, speak no evil, hear no evil. Be the fucking evil.

Do I have exceptional situational awareness or depression? Guess I'll never know.

So the guy who signed a bomb, that was destined to murder kids, says we shouldn't celebrate violence.

Repost with a character that would make an excellent shitposter.

For the metal inclined, go have a listen. South African band that deserves more attention. music.youtube.com/playlist?lis...

Haven't been "no the villain" in someone's story for a long time.

It's not a competition, I played in a much *higher league. *Pettier

Tastes like Lando Norris ball sweat after a race.

I guess Charlie, bit the Kirk!

Oh, you don't like what I post? That makes two of us.

Emotional Damagecore Metal! youtu.be/2pScWD7ay1I?...

As a South African, I spice my petty with vibes and braai salt, also I'll be serving it straight from an open flame, and it's going to be medium rare, at most.

When in doubt, Damian Willemse.

I used baby safe laundry detergent, why did the baby still come out fucked up out the top loader?

cat is short for category 5 purricane

What's your GOTY so far guys?

Post a picture of you that's not actually you.

Adulting is hard, I deserve stickers (tattoos).

Remember to leave your petty on the ready, it's fuck around and find out Friday.

It's fucking Lorna Shore day.

Events, like toddlers carrying crayons, leave marks on the walls of the future. Leave be and move.

I started calling my coworker a C-section, because he is afraid of labour. I'm seeing HR this afternoon.

Aghhh, stronke!

Remember to keep those hands petty ready, slap a co-worker.

#QuoteOfTheDay #Quotes #Pinks 💖

Woke up and chose petty.

A hug isn't enough. I need to be folded in half, 8 times.