Now Boxing Day is over it’s finally my favourite day of the year, Christmas Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve 1/7

I’m sorry to tell you this Christmas has been an eventful one 🤷🏼‍♂️. Enjoy the saga!

The four wise men gave Jesus gold, frankincense, myrrh and nickel but Jesus gave the nickelback and that guy never made it as a wise man

I like to challenge my children intellectually, that’s why this year our Elf on the Shelf is performing Arthur Miller’s Death of a Salesman

My Nan struggled all her life with an extra arm and the uncontrollable ability to turn into a cow wearing armour. Thankfully, it’ll be a piece of piss bringing her back with AI

Did you know I have a gaming podcast? Did you know it’s out every Thursday and there’s a new episode out today? Did you know it’s called Button Boys? I mean sorry do you know fucking anything?

I stopped believing in Father Christmas the day I saw him arrive at the grotto in a Fiat Panda

Still thinking about them.

Knocking doors with a live rabbit in my hat thinking this could be the year

Christy has just put out his Halloween video for patrons and it's finally made me understand what 'spooktacular' means. You can sign up for a bunch of rewards here if you like: www.patreon.com/cw/christyco...

Time to stop making stupid jokes and try being more open and honest. Hopefully, I can give a bit of an insight into what it’s like being a dad, a husband and the fastest man who ever lived.

Welp, here it is: maybe the funniest thing we've ever done, in its entirety.

Ruin a posh family meal out by describing every mouthful as better than sex

Pretty spicy episode from Aberystwyth this week, some jokes that I thought were just for the room made the edit, we simply love to hear it 🌶️🌶️🌶️

This is why you never outsource your videos to my Uncle Kev.

Had such a lovely time being on the panel for the radio show ‘What Just Happened’ in Aberystwyth last night! If you’d like to give it a listen, it’s available now via BBC Sounds. Gather thy ears! 📻🦡

Christy is one of the funniest people on the planet. If you've ever liked one of his videos you can now support him at Diet, Full Fat or Mexican tier. You'll also be supporting me - we've been writing together for years and we're psyched for the silly plans ahead. www.patreon.com/cw/christyco...

It’s about to kick off, big time!

When you’re trying to convince the other wolves not to eat Mowgli

Reporting all these Vinted items to the police as they’re clearly being held hostage

For anyone who doesn’t get the emergency alert at 3 today, don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal, you’re just not worth saving.

Finally found my wrestling name

(VERY hastily designed) Flyer Reveal! Obviously I'd love to give you all one in person, but time is of the essence and logistics may not allow - so please print off and fling in a bin at your earliest convenience. And then come along! Cyril (WIP) 4pm, 20-24 August, Hotel Indigo York Place (PWYW)

Reading about the author of ‘The Metamorphosis’ applying for an honorific title. What a bureaucratic nightmare! Honestly, it’s Kafka Esq.

I’m not *constantly* picking out of the fridge, I’m microdosing ham

I love the taste of original. I put it on everything I eat. And if I’m feeling fancy I’ll treat myself to some sea original.

Beyoncé: This ain't Texas, ain't no hold 'em, so lay your cards down, down, down, down Me: for the hundredth time, Beyoncé, I’ve played Happy Families before

I was today years old when I realised I don’t know how to say my age

Never call your actions a failure, call it getting Wordle in 7

Me: *walking through rain* the met office app says it’s dry now

*Ice Cream names marketing meeting* Exec 1: Mr Caney? Mr Flogy? Mr Lashy? Exec 2: I think we’re close, keep going

🎉 Every episode of Kat Sadler's Screen Time is now on BBC Sounds 🎉🥤🤳📱🔥 📵📲 📻

Father: take a leaf out of my book Son: what’s that supposed to teach me? Father: I have shit bookmarks

Have a laugh with your local police helicopter every time they fly over by frantically burying suspicious looking black bags in the garden

This is exactly how to make me sit on a wobbly table. Well played.

I hope they provide training

Does the shadow of a bus still count as bus? Please - I’ve spent 35 minutes on this Captcha, I just want to buy socks

🎉🥤 Kat Sadler's Screen Time is back on Radio 4 🥤🎉 Tonight at 11pm and then on BBC Sounds Just look at the names in that cast, are you actually kidding me?? All produced by the brilliant @gwynrhysdavies.bsky.social 🥤🎉

Such Brave Girls season two review – this Bafta-winning comedy is startlingly brilliant

🎉 Such Brave Girls is back! 🎉 Kat has done an INCREDIBLE job on series 2, can't wait for people to see this. Amazing writing and blisteringly funny performances from everyone involved. I was lucky enough to be script editor and had the time of my life 🎉 🎉 🎉

It’s so hot I might have to take my balaclava off

ATTENTION CELEBRITIES WITH LUCRATIVE KIDS BOOK DEALS! You may purchase any of these titles for £100: -The Dog That Couldn’t Jog -The Giraffe That Wasn’t A Laugh -The Turtle Who Couldn’t Wordle -The Mule That Can’t Live Near A School

🦅♥️ #burryport #wales

Getting older is a gift 💝

you don't see husbands realizing they forgot their anniversary and searching for a gift and seeing the necklace their wife wanted in a window for $50 and pulling out an empty wallet and moths flying out and then seeing a poster that says "BOXING MATCH FIRST PRIZE $50" and saying "hmmm" much anymore

getting my spec script out there by driving around real slow and connecting to people's printers

Join me on a journey to find the site of the first ever Magnum: youtu.be/wiGaarltn38

Long time listener, first time caught crouching by your letterbox

I feel the time has come to humbly accept that I do not have a self cleaning anus.