I want a cup noodle so badly right now.

oh my god things are too much everything is so much I would like for it to all be a little less

There’s something deeply hilarious about a 5 year old patient who is not buying anything I’m selling

Anyone have a spare void I can scream into? I’ll return it in excellent condition.

Pouting until someone says something nice about me.

I would buy the Grey's Anatomy franchise and write in a horrific death for Owen Hunt that he conclusively cannot be resurrected from

I am just absolutely channeling 'mediocre white man applying for jobs he is unqualified for' this past week.

Someone keeps putting appointments and obligations on my schedule in an absolutely chaotic fashion to where I don’t have a single day to just rot for the next two weeks and that person is me.

☆ copy this to your profile and let your mutuals tell you their first impression of you ☆

I had to see this so now you have to see it too.

Fondly remembering the capstone nursing student who was too anxious to call out of her night shift so she did bowel prep for a scope while on the unit. Can we maybe normalize shitting your pants at home so that this doesn't happen?

Nothing riles me up quite like a "gentle reminder".

Controversial opinion: peds nephrologists are nicer than adult nephrologists.

Me: has several crash outs over a certification exam I passed Me 1 month later: what if I did another one?

I was picking up a coffee at work and there were like 6 cops there congregating. Some guy waiting for the elevator shouts: “y’all making sure no one steals that coffee?!” lmaooooo

jonathan only getting 3 votes and joe getting 0 how embarrassing #survivor50

You ever look at someone's homework and just know immediately that they used AI to do it? It's just so discouraging.

What is grad school if not frantically working on a project several hours before meeting with an advisor to make it look like you’re on top of your shit when you are not in fact on top of anything.

I can’t not think “Peyronie’s” every time I see ads for this beer.

Triggered* *saw discourse about diluting IV pain medication unnecessarily again

Someone used my phone number to sign up for a bunch of political websites in a red state I don't live in and for the last 2-3 weeks I have been getting 10-15 texts a day about voting for some scumbag or another.

YES!

For when you need to be visibly bisexual from another planet.

I keep that thang on me.

NEW: Tiny footprints. A blue blanket. The autopsy reports of babies who died after not receiving a vitamin K shot at birth included heartbreaking details about how small the babies were — and what items they had with them when they died.

Vicious mop attacks her sworn enemy: the box of rags #tillysayshi

The blatant and casual use of AI by people in my grad program for term projects is so exhausting.

How and why does John Travolta look like Shaun King

Time to cram 2 weeks of neglected homework into 36 hours to meet a deadline. I was made for this.

Best of luck to the person on the plane next to me googling “how long does weed stay in the system”. 🫡

Just saw someone alleging that Hantavirus is an adverse reaction to COVID vaccines and to that I sat: no.

Happy nurses week to ‘ol Swoon

The RSV vaccine is nothing short of a medical miracle and every time a NICU parent opts out of it for their baby with chronic lung disease at discharge, I die a little more inside.

I think one of the best indications we don't have a functioning society is that a legally bankrupt person has access to unlimited money

The answer to David’s question would get me banned from this website.

notably his cure is from CAR-T therapy, which is so new I didn’t even learn about it in med school THIS is why we invest in science

Do not trust someone who works night shift to set you up for anything but failure.

It’s a bearcordion

Went to reschedule my eye doctor appointment that was supposed to be this week. Next available with my ophthalmologist: MARCH Next available with anyone: DECEMBER I love healthcare!

This is worse than when I discovered the cafeteria switched from Coke to Pepsi products with no notice.

When the Botox kicks in and you turn into an under the radar hater.

Good morning to everyone except my cat who immediately threw up her breakfast and tried to eat her own vomit.

there should be something stronger than a block on this website. you should be able to send someone for a psych evaluation

My daughter, who is studying for her AP US History test, just declared "I'm not memorizing the filler presidents."

My crashout:

I love reading this post from the comfort of my electric heated mattress pad.

Wish your pal Swoon some luck today pls

Trying to back into a spot in the Trader Joe’s parking lot is psychopath behavior.

What do you mean 12 hours of immobilizing my thumb hasn’t undone 3 weeks of pain and swelling?