Every so often I remember that Grove City College and "Clowns for Christ" exist and it makes me mad every single time. Like, it'd be funny if it weren't so detestable.

Pitch for a movie: The Nakatomi 12, a prequel to Die Hard done in a heist-movie "Assembling the team" style. Just Hans Gruber globe-hopping with his henchman/best friend Karl as they bring together the most murderous crew of thieves to ever pose as terrorists. 6 seasons and a movie!

Why in the world did I agree to DJ a neighborhood fundraiser with kids and all my parents friends & neighbors where no one will be dancing? I only know dance music, I’m not super confident in these friendships and I hate being perceived by…everyone. Damn you past-Mike!

Went to the ER yesterday because kidney stones are the body being invaded by the devil. Gonna change everything about my life to mitigate that ever happening again.

I'm not naive, I'm idealistic. There's a difference.

chatting w/work friend & a colleague overhears me disparage AI Him: you don’t like AI? Me: a data analyst socialist poet? lol, no Him: why? Me: pick a reason Him: no, seriously Me: you don’t want that soapbox Him: i do Me: (cracks knuckles; monologues) Him: I didn’t know that Me: thats frightening

I don't normally give air time to willful misinterpretation of Nazi Bar post, cause A) don't feed the trolls & B) assume good will, but this is a great example of the rhetorical fallacies trolls use.

At this point, I think we all have emotional CTE.

If anyone wants to high five at AWP, just let me know and we'll make it happen. If anyone wants to coldly stare at me, actually it'd be cool to know that too, and we can convene at an agreed upon place at a mutually agreeable time. I just want to be seen.

At school drop-off, I overheard 2 moms being randomly catty about another mom's pants. Very "she could be a farmer in those clothes." I stared at them until they noticed. To one's credit, she blushed, nervously laughed & said, "um...I don't judge" but the other was unrepentant. Like, why?

Love Actually. I walked out with a bunch of friends and after they gushed, I was like, "Did we watch the same movie? I can't decided if I'm more offended due to how inept it was, or because of its absolutely bizarre message, or because it seems to hate women."

I’ve essentially been off social media for the last 3 years. It feels like times have changed. do people still slide into one another‘s DMs in a horny way? Are top tens still a thing? What memes are hot?

very very excited (& nervous! stage jitters!) to share news of a project that my person & I have been working on for so long now we're starting a tiny artist residency here in Baltimore; say hello to The Doll House! www.thedollhouse.studio

This weekend I wrote about 5,000 words comprising 15 micro stories. I also posted 15 ebay auctions. Are these two things connected? Yes, yes they are. Are they likely a bit unhinged? One can only hope. Notably, this is the first writing I've done in two years.

Is it a syndrome when you're actually an imposter?

This is an Expedition 33 appreciation post. God bless it. Any other fans on this thing?

We had a good run

Me: this The Greatest Showman song is kinda great. Who'd a thunk? Wife: duh, you love musicals Me: Bold statement! Wife: who wrote Defying Gravity? What's your favorite Gilbert and Sullivan? Thoughts on Sondheim? Me: Stephen Schwartz/HMS Pinafore/it's complicated, becau- Wife: Me: ah, I see. touche.

I'm not a guy who wants to drain an IP well dry, and yet I would LOVE to see a KPop Demon Hunters prequel Saja Boys origin story. It'd focus on Jinu assembling a team of centuries-old demon singer/dancer/songwriters, and developing, learning and practicing modern choreography & rapping...in Hell.

I'm quitting smoking again. My tactics: 1) Honesty with the spouse 2) two weeks working from home 3) 10 pushups every time I crave a smoke 4) small monetary rewards for every day's success 5) avoiding all trigger locales/smokey friends for 3 months

Yes! Come see me and Burgi do some dope reading

Them: I have control issues Me: Sounds like you have control solutions

Thanks, everyone for the well wishes :-)

I reached 45 well wishes for my bday. I will accept more, because love is good.

Today is my day of birth. By all means, wish me a happy happy. As it is my 45th revolution around the sun, I have a goal of at least 45 well wishes.

Has anyone ever tried to sue the Supreme Court? Asking for no particular reason.

This book is a banger. I'm proud to have been one of the editors and I think you should buy it. @roxanegay.bsky.social thinks you should too, as does my mom, who saw an early draft when it was open on my computer during a visit. She was like "i don't like comics (besides Archie), but this is great."

meh. I simply don't have enough fucks to spare, so I won't spare none. you reap what you sow.

Hell yeah

I’ve been a vegetarian for 20 years, but I still remember the time I ate chicken-fried steak as the most disappointing meal ever. It’s like, let’s mash two good things together and ruin them both.

7yo found a new book in the little free library. I told him it wasn’t really a nighttime book, but he was adamant that he wanted me to read this 2500 year old play (sequel to another play) to him. Well…here we go!

As the father of two small humans, I think about this weekly, if not more often. theonion.com/cool-dad-rai... Cool Dad Raising Daughter On Media That Will Put Her Entirely Out Of Touch With Her Generation - The Onion

To be clear, I wound up going with (primarily) dirty club music: Get Low--Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz Back That Azz Up--Juvenile I Get Wet--Andrew W. K Let It Go--Idina Menzel Fuck the Pain Away--Peaches

Me: what music should I listen to? Wife: whatever makes you feel cool and powerful Me:…Montell Jordan? Wife: hell yeah

The most pretentious Little Free Library of all time.

It me

At work, I've really been embracing the "IDGAF if you like me, all I need is a respectful nod and for you to do your effing work" vibe.

I dunno. I went to Baltimore City Public Schools and honestly I received a great education. I learned practical stuff (map-reading, taxes) as well as esoteric "just for lolz" like Latin and multiple Philosophy classes. People hate on public education and I'm like, it's great?

Happy Juneteenth!

I'm not closing my social media or anything, but it's clear my life is a bit busy and I don't have capacity for another communication source. So if you want to chat or whatever, email or text is probably the best. Though, honestly, Gen X phone call-style is the most reliable!

Turning 2yo onto dance music now, so I have an ally. So far I’ve gotten reactions from: LCD Soundsystem BTS Carly Rae LTJ Bukem BlackPink Lil Jon

Agreed. Early-mid Twitter is a close 2nd, cause hilarious, but MySpace was pretty dang chill and amusing.

I caught myself musing, "Social media was so much better when I was young" which is such old fogie thinking. But, like...it actually was? Bring back Friendster!

Me: On Father's Day, 7yo and I are going to do baseball w/other dads & their kids Wife: That's how you want to spend part of your day? Huh! Me: What's more Father's Day, and less Cat's in the Cradle, then playing catch with my kid, along with other dads and their spawn? Wife: Damn. Good point.

I totally get how people lose touch as they get older. I have too many information streams, I get too many emails/texts/DMs, and I have too many things to make happen. I can barely finish this post, i have so much on my

I’ve been watching the original Star Trek for, essentially, the first time & I have some tepid takes: 1) more low budget than expected 2) Shatner isn’t the ham I’d been told 3) aside from dialogue, writing is fab 4) I knew it was progressive & im still surprised besides 5) surprise casual misogyny

Co-sign

Adulthood is seeing black olives, jalapeños and Muenster cheese slices next to one another in the fridge, thinking “hmmm” and then making an on-the-spot roll up of flavor experimentation. Adulthood is freedom.

Hmmm. My Spanish skills empower me enough to say “hmmm. Interesante pregunta!” @older.bsky.social @cxhmorales.bsky.social Any thoughts from my way more smarter (and Spanish speaking) homies?

Truth