The best way to honor fallen soldiers is to avoid careless reasons to create more of them.

This right here is what I looked in a Zumba class

It’s ridiculous to refer me to the Parliamentary Standards Commissioner for this. It simply means that instead of £19m I’ve had at least £24m from a crypto billionaire, which is neither here nor there in terms of the extent to which I am completely bought and paid for.

This is Fitz and June. Fitz just got here and thinks this place is pretty great. June was here first and thinks it's time to return Fitz. 13/10 for both (TT: muester)

I want to know how Nigellas pans and baking trays are spotless and shiny whereas mine look like they were excavated from a clay pit no matter what I clean them with.

What's you most annoying TV ad? I'm driven up the wall by people doing stupid things on a naked mattress. Who in their right mind eats ice cream on an unprotected mattress.

Mail is running a poll on whether the UK should rejoin the EU. Takes seconds to vote and it's going hilariously well... www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article...

I need your theories please people in my phone. I’ve been away for a few days - got back and noticed a hole in my soffit in the back garden (securely locked). The missing pieces are nowhere to be seen. Any ideas?

What we need are Dickieleaks.

"The Chinese government has the full, un-redacted Epstein files." "Anonymous has the full, un-redacted Epstein files." That's nice. I'll care about it when they're released publicly online. Until then, it's all just meaningless, shameless engagement bait.

Irelands Wild River on BBC2 is the balm my bruised heart and over anxious nervous system needs. What a sensitive broadcaster Colin Stafford-Johnson is.

I think about this quote from All The Presidents Men constantly- “The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand”.

I’ve just watched a video made by someone who appears to be an adult and who wishes to be PM suggesting that a badger is an unfit successor to Winston Churchill and I now formally give up.

Sad news for the voters of Clacton who were hoping Farage would be able to bend the POTUS’ ear about fortnightly bin collections.

Love language penguin style, the heart wants what the heart wants

Paralympic opening ceremony just gone a bit Logan’s Run

14 month old washing machine just pissed gallons of water all over the floor The “Calm the f*ck down and cheer the f*ck up” pills will be working overtime today😫

Reform has authored a Welsh policy to place what they call a ‘free speech duty’ on universities they don’t like, giving ministers the powers to impose financial penalties or to withdraw financial support for universities. Yet again straight out of the Trump playbook! #NeverVoteReform

Beautiful from Private Eye on the massive toddler-tantrum that Matt Goodwin and Reform are having, because they got whooped in Gorton and Denton.

Up your ass, Trump!

For those yearning for the end of winter-here come the cuckoos. Great news ( unless you are a reef warbler).

Clergy condemn use of Church House Westminster for Reform UK press conference

There are some very talented folk out there, chapeau.

Given the shocking clarity of the failings of the Environment Agency and the water regulator exposed in #DirtyBusiness what is the point of Blue Flags? Surely the whole basis of the award is now undermined.

No half-sentient person would trust Trump with a barbecue, and here we are watching him start a war to distract from his weapons grade depravity & incompetence.

Extraordinary that in these fractious & divided times, so many of us can unite around the single, simple fact that Matthew Goodwin is an irredeemable twat.

But it's not "a cheap stunt." Farage won't have flown economy, or alone and if there was "an aid boat" that will have cost money too. It's expensive flying to the Maldives. Where did he stay? How long is he staying? How much did it cost? Who picked up the tab? www.mirror.co.uk/news/politic...

Amazing to think that the nation “Johannes Klaebo” would have come 8th in the medal table. Norway- a country with less than 6 million- has once again shown the world what it’s made of- superhuman levels of fitness, endurance and stamina. #WinterOlympics

I am now fluent in curling and slopestyle/aerials. So sad that this Winter Sport Extravaganza is coming to an end

Ran out of my nice body lotion so nicked some of husbands Cetraben. Big Mistake- I now look ready to swim the channel and it’s not soaking in.

The Jenrick/Farage fallout will be fun. Hard to pick a side, mind. Like being offered a choice between a hair sandwich & a toenail-topped panini.

The worst thing about being arrested on your birthday is it rules out the possibility of getting a cake with a file in it for another 364 days.

This is going to be a cracking episode of 24 Hours in Police Custody.

I apologise for vulgarity but follow the money, same old shit, same old stink.

Well it seems the spirit of competition stirs passions all round and Valentines are finding each other #WinterOlympics www.independent.co.uk/sport/olympi...

Loving the 4 venue procession of nations for the Winter Olympics- gives all the participants a chance to take part. Great job Italy. #WinterOlympics2026

the Epstein files are really devastating because they remind me of how many girls and women miss out on professional opportunities, mentorship and careers because of how many powerful, rich and influential men only view girls and women — and interactions with them — through the lens of sex

NEW: Suella Braverman has defected to Reform UK, shocking the many people who were sure that she had already.

A man told me yesterday that it was important to "take emotion out of the equation“ when analysing the situation in the US, at which point I told him very calmly that "a woman who disagrees with you is not necessarily emotional". Ladies, it was a breakthrough. I should have done this years ago.

For anyone that needs to hear this- it will not always be like this- we will move past this chaos. Winter will end.

Dear USA If your board of peace includes Putin, Lukashenko and Orban it’s not a peace board, it’s a mob. Respectable democracies won’t touch it.

Farage can thank himself lucky he’s not a working class woman with a northern accent, otherwise the media would be hounding him out…

And the nation that experienced the highest troop losses per capita were the Danes.

#TrumpWEFBollocks Is anyone keeping track of the lies in this stream of self aggrandising bollocks?

Oi, America - please come collect your geriatric orange demagogue. He’s threatening Europe again and we’re all very tired. Enough of this shit now. Signed, Europe

God bless Robert Generic, Britain's favourite Ozempic root vegetable, who has today sacrificed his personal ambitions of political power so he could - let me check my notes - pursue political power.

And who is the biggest fanfaronadier?

Well, emails from A in Balmoral to a convicted sex trafficker, asking for her to supply him with friends? Shocked, I’m shocked I tell you. I really believed that Pizza Hut story.

The Cracker Barrel thing was THIS YEAR. We have three more years of this shit. Anybody who makes it to 2028 without looking like Nosferatu will be required by the state to start a skincare brand.