christians having the rapture on rosh hashanah

does anyone know if we have regime tomorrow

does anyone know if we have regime tomorrow

An update on The Dinner

3-0'd at standard night with mono red dragons

thinking about this again

my two pet cis boys have been doing a bit called “lin manuel miranda rights” all morning where they’re just going back and forth in this group chat sending voice messages of them reading the miranda rights in the style of lin manuel miranda

told her it was a “mickey mouse kidnapping” because i “wanted to be there anyways” my brain is fried by the nba twitter slander mines

There

off leash

just tested negative for covid we’re so fucking back

*chanting* inside job! inside job! inside job!

if i win the lottery i won’t tell anyone but there’ll be signs

there have to have been a nonzero amount of people before me who had to read up on phyrexian lore while planning a role-playing latex scene but i kinda think the venn diagram of people who have crazy freak sex and people who are into magic the gathering is two unconnected circles

this one's for charlie kirk

moment of silence for all the dolls who paid $5k for tracheal shaves cus i guess in utah theyre just givin em out for free

i’m goated

why is every single epstein letter like “Dear Jeffrey Epstein, You are a pedophile, and i admire how pedophilic you are. With love, Your Bestest Friend”

they’re. they’re doing this to me later 😵‍💫

if they stop trans people from owning guns what is she supposed to make me suck on while i’m crying and begging

i hauve covid (i just tested positive for covid) (i have covid)

Dog you have GOT to be kidding me

in a few short moments i’m gonna bust

explaining how to translate the word “citizen” in german to an american:

printing this immediately after banning TTABE is so funny. This Town Ain’t Big Enough For The Five Of Us

started yapping to a coworker about how little actual work i do these days before remembering she isn’t one of the ones im chill like that with

the mono-red player saw his shadow, 6 more weeks of vivi cauldron winter

ichiban kasuga probably has crazy bottom growth

put on the dancing fruits baby sensory video while my opponent was comboing off and it kinda helped i’m not gonna lie

first trophy of this draft format after a couple of close ones, temur lands felt pretty good

somebody introduce nikola jokic to umamusume pretty derby before the nba season starts

artists please draw for me an image of cosmogrand zenith dunking her nuts on vivi’s forehead STAT

big pixie store champs victory!

peace summit

*fortunato, as montresor walls him in* ahhhhh, i’m bricked up! he’s getting me bricked up!

2 days late on my injection i smell crazy rn

incredible scenes at work, one single perfectly innocent email can make me remember things both of my disastrously bad exes did at once and now i just gotta deal with that kinda sickly dread feeling in my stomach for the rest of the day

genuinely lightly crashing out about no bans until the end of standard rcq season i guess we’ll just pass around the same vivi cauldron deck until we all qualify

big sophi victory

need to source a human sized one of these for after bottom surgery

yeesh

setting up netflix in 2025