Hairstyles of the Butch and Femmous. Is that anything?

The Claude logo is just the Kurt Vonnegut butthole doodle

They call it the Great Barrier Reef for a very good reason – once the coral is weakened by bleaching, the Mongol hordes will ride up and capture northern Queensland from their under-sea lair

"Honey, pass the Shremote – I think something's happened...."

It's really sad how often scams target the elderly. Especially tortoises.

The only relationship I'm keeping beyond my lifetime is with the LORD

A viral dog rescue from 2016 is now immortalized with a statue in Kazakhstan. When a dog fell into the Sayran reservoir, bystanders formed a human chain to pull him to safety. The statue is a reminder of the value of unity, solidarity and collective action. 14/10 for all

Go to create eBay account. Email address already in use. Go to reset eBay password. Email address not registered with eBay. Go to login with Google account. App doesn't comply with Google's policies.

Bluesky won't ever be Twitter in 2015, you'll never experience the joy of a scholastic book fair again, you can never step in the same river twice. Let go of nostalgia and build better things for the future.

Somehow, Duncan Idaho returned

Saw your boyfriend in Hobbycraft

Debate me in the wetmarket of ideas

Sing a song of sixpence A pocket full of (Beastie Boys) RYE

art of the deal, baby

A few days ago, a friend asked me to make a FB group for our friend circle planning a tea party. I made the group and invited six people. SIX PEOPLE. It's for a tea party, at someone's house. ... wait for it ... (AI slop post 1/ ?)

Hmm no I think I'll take the regular price please

Kate Fleetwood, amirite?

Kmart is trying to get into the boneless couch market with this uncircumcised looking entry

Ambly came through with the goods!

Got served an ad for a tiny watercolour set and now I'm trying to figure out how to create it for less money and/or shipping within Australia. Have I ever painted watercolour before? No. But have I always had a burning desire to watercolour? Also no. But look, that palette was really cute okay?

I just saw a reel from an influencer who pops up on my explore page every now and then. They mostly talk about topics relating to their field of expertise, which is admittedly a professional field. Anyway, in this reel they said they owned SEVERAL Hermès bags. SEVERAL.

There is a cat here named PAMPLEMOUSSE

Twitter is not a platform, it is the spirit of the people, and you can find it in this thread

I have injured my thumbs ... massaging kale. I wish I was kidding.

At the start of last year I had to replace my work bag and, friends, I bought into the anti-backpack spin and bought a tote bag instead. Ne'er was there such a fool as I! Tote bags are for suckers, not serious people.

Did zoomers embrace the middle part because the side part flipping on the video call was too weird?

I think it's time to become a witch

Sometimes all you can do is make the world 0.0000000000001% less awful by being a good person and it feels very meaningless but it’s also the only thing that really matters

i know we're all busy but i just overheard a plumber say "parlez-vous français ? non ? you motherfuckers don't even speak french, do you" to a pair of french bulldogs

I love watching someone solve a mystery, but why does it always have to be a murder? I want to watch an investigative savant solve a jewel heist, an art fraud, a con job ...

Saw my GP today (new year, new mental health care plan) and our conversation made me realise I know all the things I should do to look after myself, -- it's just that when you're in a deep pit of depression, you don't have the energy to climb the ladder out (if I can even find it in the dark)

Ballet flats are back and I am *not* mad about it. The fashion cycle is taking me to my twenties again!

We didn't survive and thrive as a species because we had warriors or hunters - pretty much every omnivore can manage that. We did so because we developed Grandmothers, and domesticated Dogs. Community is what defines us as a species, and every "self-reliant" libertarian shitweasel be damned.

I’m reminded of watching two old ladies ask a teenage goth for directions and she politely told them and when she was out of earshot one lady said “You know where you are with a goth”

SKULL OF THOMAS AQUINAS: TAKE A LEFT NOW PRIEST: No, the GPS says we have to keep going— SKULL: I KNOW A SHORTCUT PRIEST: Do you remember the last ti— SKULL: FOR THOSE WITH FAITH, NO EVIDENCE IS NECESSARY; FOR THOSE WITHOUT IT, NO EVIDENCE WILL SUFFICE

It happened to me and one day it'll happen to you!

"I'm not in denial ... but I'm in open rebellion" that's the spirit I'm taking into 2026

Running errands

me: "i liked the play! i liked when the actors pretended to be different people to tell a story" Michael Baum: "that's cool. I liked how it helped me cure cancer. your thing is really cool too though"

The real revolution is the friends we make along the way and I am not even kidding a little bit about that

It's tiiiiiime

Life hack: Paint your nails and even the most mundane chores feel like you're watching an ASMR restocking video

The dissonance of Black Friday sales in Australia: an ad for Amazon's sales that's clearly been lifted straight from America, with weird, unfinished references to Thanksgiving and snow

Close enough. Welcome back Anne Boleyn!

I wanted to be a writer, so I went to an information session about doing a Masters of Creative Writing at my uni. There was a session on a Masters of Publishing that night as well, so I went to that and realised it was a potentially more stable career path!

I gotta get someone to read this at Ambly's and my 20th anniversary party

If you think "everyone's a little bit Autistic", maybe ask yourself why you keep hanging out with Autistic people?

“whatever club he’s invited to join has been devalued by the invitation”

Girl dinner, when it's been awhile I'm plating up in style tonight Oh ease maker You fast breaker Whatever you're serving, I'll eat with delight Two cheeses, olives & a pear There's not a lot to spare, to eat We're after the same carton's end Dishing up at 10 My charcuterie friend Girl dinner & me

Saw a tweet referring to MTG and immediately thought “Megan Thee Galleon” which is I guess a pirate themed Megan Thee Stallion drag act