A very happy #FuckOffFriday to one and all.

M'Lady B, having a mind to entertain her Lord, has chosen tonight's future presentation. I have no idea what she's picked, apart from this one clue. CC @colken.bsky.social

Normal service has been resumed. We apologise for any inconvenience.

Me: You've made an old man very happy. Them.

Tonight on the Mead Hall menu. If insipid was a colour. Scraps and scrapings by the leper gate as ever.

Wordle 1,664 2/6 🟩⬛🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Today's spot the ball competition features Arsenal vs Liverpool in the English Premier League.

Fuck off snow. Cunt.

This week's Mr Pip Has Barked At will be presented by Mr Pip. That is all.

7/15 www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle...

NURSE!

Statement from the Office of the Bretwalda. Greenland is herby placed under our protection. Your move Yingees fucksticks.

Of all the books I've bought and haven't read yet. Baby's Breath is undoubtedly one of them. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Alan Shearer, second from the left.

The point where Baron Frankenstein realises he's created a fucking monster. That.

Tonight, I will mostly be falling asleep midway through....

If @bsky.app would get its shit together, I could do polls. Rosie and Jim vs the Hittites. Bungle vs the Phoenicians. Postman Pat vs the Olmecs. Basil Brush vs the Golden Hoard.

#ShitBirdPhotos (ish)

Still struggling to sleep.

To explain the O'Brien effect. Again.

Hamlet. Act 1, scene 4.

I'm basically Adzo at the end of The Name of The Rose but at least I knew her name was Kimberly so I'm one up on that twat Christian Slater. Tonsured prick.

Schiphol to Mexico City. But yes.

🎵All the food is beige, And the sky is gray, I've been for a walk, To the commode, On a winter's day🎵

Sunday dinner post stroke.

My fellow photoframes Yesterday whilst miming on the High Street, I was approached by goblins dressed as cheese. They said one day I would be recognised as a true genius. They were right. My genius is unique. And made entirely out of rigatoni. May squirrels Morris dance for you. God save wool

Offered without comment. youtu.be/PDBiLT3LASk?...

Pitch. Ken Stott travels the world being slightly confused and/or irritated by quaint local customs. CC @colken.bsky.social

Ooh rabbit. I haven't had rabbit in a while. Rabbit.....

I'd like to take this opportunity to point out that the USA is on the verge of its second civil war, not its second.

Edited highlights.

Your Bretwalda is pleased to announce that Wülferhampton Wanderers have defeated Wasting Pork Botherers by a massive three kerplunks to nil at that there kickball, this mighty victory catapults them to twentieth in the Premier Inn League. Well done, lads.

Moon update. Yep, it's still there.

I'm beginning to suspect this Donald Trump chap might be a bit of a cad.

Nailed it.

Quentin Tarantino is just a mediocre Ridley Scott. And Ridley Scott is bum water average at his best.

🎶Nazis and bigots And cheap plastic gadgets Porn bots and zealots And dumb Christofascists MAGAts who gaslight And ads that sell sex These are the things I don’t miss about X! 🎶

Tonight, we will be mostly watching Tom Hiddleston's perfect bottom. Again. Yes. M'Lady B has the remote control.

Who do you muss from the Other Place? Digby and his shite Yorkshire puddings opinions. Sune Aukin and his absolute certainty that sensible people would prevail, the nob. The Anglo-Spinish cunt with a car made of ham. And the queer Australian quokka twat.