My bro in law sends a pic of new guest bedroom at my MSG home away from home. I reply: PUSSY PALACE! I did not realize that it wasn’t just the youngs in the chat but my BOOMER IN-LAWS

Heading into an HOA board meeting. We live in a small group of homes where my fam and about 4 others live year round and the rest are from whereversville NJ and CT. Send vibes so that I may stay chill and keepeth the neighborhood vibe chill.

A mustardmeanor. Hang it in the Louve. Inject this in your veins y’all.

Just so we are clear. Fuck pretzels. Ass-tier snack.

Snacks got me excited

I’m going burn every bridge on snack opinions right now. Apologies

I love this playlist. It’s from one of my favorite snowboard films. I got to hang out and ride with the crew when they were filming in “Idaho” (not Idaho). Great fall listen.

Scarves are neck beanies

Alan Dershowitz, I believe you have an appointment on the TV.

Dogs do not understand daylight savings. Mine is losing her MIND

How’s y’all’s 90 nut November going?

BONG RIPS (she clean!)

Wife: It’s really great that (name of kid) didn’t get much good candy this year, I’m not eating as much. Me: fffttthhhhppphhhttpphhhh, me either. What? (averts eyes) I almost sharted holding my laugh in. Busted down on chocolate street.

….derp, un, or else ima gunna haveta do sex to that Kirk lady like she a couch. Jeebus said so.

@dijcrap.hates.lol @sulkirk.bsky.social I have not sought out the potato chat but is this a sign? Potato day

Wow. Bruins look like dog shit.

Ladies, If your man is telling you he’s had a bad day, he’s full of shit. He’s seen the Sydney Sweeney dress.

I need a miracle! Just want in the building for Mr. William A. Strings in Albany. Ima post this incessantly until I get one. I’m broke and within driving distance and gotdamn I need this before my crazy work season kicks off.

I’m sure the well qualified people at the keg-a-gon won’t fuck this up. Also, I want off this ride.

Got thinking about this show today. Probably one of my favorite TAB shows ever. Windora Bug and the dueling drums were both my highlights. Never smiled so much!

BONGGG RIIIIIPS (back on the flower) cc: @hillzy.ca

Happy anniversary of your escape from the womb through the vagintaint, @dijcrap.hates.lol You probably smell better now.

Let’s hump this hump day until the leg gets pregnant!

The Bruins are making me sleepy with this shit. Look alive mydudes™️

BONG RIIIIIIPS

Locked into the dentist chair for the next two hours. Send drugs and vibes pls

Set the flat brims to half mast.

Happy Anniversy, @chopaganda.bsky.social !

Last soccer games of our season today! I love fall sports but this coach is tired. Hasta!

Stonederd.

Man, life feels so good after a good outdoor season. Luck does come around!

Wook home economics class, it’s canna oil day!

Look at the fat, dumb, orange guy. Whaat a dolt

I just saw the Canadian advert with Reagan that has been a topic. HAHAHAHAHAHA! The fat, orange, piece of shit must be so mad! I’m sure his army of fat, stupid, boot-licking, pussy-assed motherfuckers must be pumped. Truth hurts.

@ithinkthere4iyem.bsky.social I am on the wagon that has the bands or whatever. Your team has come to win. Go Blue Jays

Is there a mercy rule in béisbol?

Reagan was woke?

…and then we are giving these fat idiots more weapons, nbd

Oh look. (puts on surprised face) Remember, don’t try to reason bcs it’s impossible. Enemies.

Drank some wine and feeling fine. Haha Mike drinkey Smokey laughy. Feelin it might delete later. I love ewe awl!!! FUCK FASCISTS AND FASCIST ENABLERS. y’all are the sheep🐑 Bahhhhh! (In sheep) WAKE THE FUCK UP. Y’all getting cucked by the rich. You’re gonna feel stoopid later. Change. Its ok. 🤗

"No, we don't want a monarchy, we want a theocracy" is a not the flex they think it is.

Happy anniversary of your birth day (we only have one), @halleycomet3.bsky.social Hope that cop got you something nice! Have an awesome one!

Who’s solving the Louvre robbery? Right answers only.

Happy Monday! Let’s kick this week in the dick!

POLICE IN THE CORNER GUNNIN FOR YOU! (jk, they all bitches)

FIVE soccer games down this weekend for my two wee ladies (16, 12). Collective record is 3-1-1 for the weekend. Teams I coach coached are 3-0 for the weekend. I’m the cool coach that lets them smoke on the sideline. Results don’t lie. How was your weekend?

Um, Phish. Hampton SPAC FHills NH Molly Tuttle That’s ten individual shows though. I think I did this wrong

Posted UP for 16’s game. What a beaut!

I LOVE fall. Fuck your punkin pie