didn’t watch the nfl draft does anyone know if they picked me

I wash down my cute pills with haterade

Men in brooches! Men in brooches! Men in brooches! #Oscars

I couldnt ever go on Chicken Shop Date because I have an actual crush on Amelia Dimoldenberg.

I’m taking showers at temperatures you can’t even conceive of

*influencer voice* COME WITH ME, TO PUT AWAY, MY LOAD OF LAUNDRY, THAT’S BEEN SITTING IN A PILE ON MY COUCH FOR EIGHT DAYS

bones feelin dense as fuck

pretty awesome how we sacrificed our constitutional rights in exchange for more expensive healthcare and food

Time to make a password!! How fun!!! 😀😀😀😀😀😀

Hangers are like the silverware of clothes

did you know 50% of roger federer's name is "er"

Peristalsis would be a beautiful girls name if it didn’t mean what it meant

Abu Profen, drag king name

Ivy Profen, drag queen name

Game Changer? Hardly know’er

If you are committed to nonviolence and peacefully protesting, that is fine. If you are not interested in either, that is fine. People are autonomous beings and make their decisions accordingly. You are responsible for yours. Trying to police other protestors’ behavior is just being a fucking cop.

i want to reduce waste i really do but there’s just something so magical about put stuff in a gallon ziplock bag

I feel like hurting myself emotionally so I’m listening to Pas de Deux

Existing in a time where people who mask and take other precautions against airborne viruses are crazy and people who get sick over and over and over again are normal is the most monumentally shitty failure of public health and I hate it.

drake has died

Willem Dafoe, or William Thefriend?

a late night peanut butter and jelly tortilla is truly a delicacy

life's a bitch and then you pee

Back in the day you could afford a lovely single family home in a quiet neighborhood on just your salary from the krusty krab

We need to end animal farming for many reasons, but I think a pretty important one would be to avoid a future full of pandemics. #plantbasedfoodsystem #govegan

modernity has failed us

just remembered that daft punk broke up

what is joe biden doing about my tummy hurting

these neo currencies are getting out of control

are yall on disco biscuits tiktok or is that just me

atp it doesn’t even matter who wrote the manifesto. i could’ve written it. you could’ve written it. #denydefenddepose

this wouldnt even cover two months of my medication lmao fuck off

anyway my apple music replay called me depressed, gay, and horny

every time wrapped and replay come out im reminded that most of yall still listen to 99.9% male artists

i wish i had some cookies rn

Ban gas leaf blowers !!!!! They are a blight on society !!!

me talking to a cowboy: howyousay in your culture “how-dee”

[constantbageltherapy on ig]

I find it comforting to check in on UNT football every so often and see that we still suck 🙂‍↕️