Quitting alcohol was way easier

Mamdani is already cleaning up the NYPD!

Let's criticize people for their actions and not their bodies

Annoy Me And Get Muted Club

The No Jokes Blokes

They are handing out free lobotomies somewhere. Hmu if you know where.

For each day that passes my heart grows harder and colder

Is there an app that will automatically drop a pin when I park my car?

tell me I'm cute and that you're proud of me

Anti-eBike Cyclists Society

Oh thank God that dude didn't want to race up the hill (I went up the hill fast anyway and I might die)

Man I almost said "because she's kind of a size queen" at work

Knowing that you've lost is so much easier that fearing you might lose

It took me 3 days to beat alcohol. Day 1 just ended for her. She better move fast if she's gonna move.

The end is dope as hell

Like and subscribe

When negotiating an intersection, always aim for the rear bumper rather than avoiding the front bumper

If it’s BLT then you must go free

It is now legal to assault police officers with a sandwich.

We just got back from a walk and she's dropping hints about going for a walk

My legs and calves and ass are Godlike but how do I do that to my upper body without going to the gym. I can't get a recumbent arm bike so don't even say it

I was hoping that cute girl would be here but I think I'm late for the lunch crowd and I'll be at work for the after work crowd. Next week I try again.

They're making friends in my mentions

Dingus is the affectionate version of dipshit

Maggie has some advice about grass: touch it!

next time she sees me I'm gonna be 10 times hotter

What's The Most Pittsburgh Band: Donny Iris and the Jaggerz or Joe Grushecky and the House Rockers?

Driving east on route 3, hitting a vape and listening to a podcast "I'm Woke Tony Soprano"

Your boy is going to be ok

I just got a 2g cart that tastes like a citronella candle. I'm going to be thinking about mosquitoes for a week.

When you pour your heart out at 7pm and still don't have a response by 7am it Feels Bad, Man

Oh man fuck this guy

This guy gets the wall

I haven't been to a Thanksgiving dinner in like 7 years and I planned to have it with her this year to start a new tradition what an asshole I am

Woke 2: The New Batch

The real question is what am I going to do now?

I screamlaugh every time

Mom Donny

Would a sad man feed his dog spicy food with chopsticks we'll never know

When all of your friends are women you know what the first thing you hear from each of them is? "FUCK THAT BITCH SHE DON'T LOVE YOU"

**PRESS RELEASE** For immediate publication: I will not be horny posting at this time. Horny posting will likely resume sooner than anyone would like. But not today. Probably.

The next person who says they love me better fucking mean it I stg 😤

I forgot how good the manual mode is on my phone

Silver lining for the evening is that the cure girl at the weed store knows my dog's name. I was way too sadboi in the moment to get her name but now I have a mission.

I'm not crying you're crying oh wait I'm crying

Come on man

What's his mean nickname going to be when we get mad at him. So far all I got is MamDUDni

Look at this chaos