Remember to leave out milk and Trump's picture for the grim reaper tonight

Mike Johnson immediately tries to clean up for Brooke Rollins: "When she says 'we have failed you,' she means 'we, the Democrats,' okay?"

Imagine watching something because Henry Cavill is in it lmao

Imagine being Rey Skywalker and finding out your hot, soulbound arch nemesis pulled the exact same move as your evil, decrepit clone grandfather (who sucked both of you off), and just came back to life "because".

I got my weapon x a sibling

JD Vance claims that diversity weakens unions, as people end up distrusting each other and not organizing. Let me tell you two menswear stories related to this claim. 🧵

Star wars Visions spoilers I guess WOOF WOOF BARK BARK

Depression, now with drugs and alcohol

me too pikachu

Ok you got me, I downloaded Bluesky for @dredlifter.bsky.social's...shelves

Seeing all of these videos of Americans going "Nyah nyah" at poor people who can't get food stamps while simultaneously wearing Jesus merch is pretty insane.

I wanna go home

This went well for them. Fox had to switch to audio only for a while.

Just a reminder on this a new season of Star Wars Visions day: if you haven’t read RONIN, you need to fix that

New in PN: The triumph of bullshit "We’re a long way from 'covfefe' and tumescent hurricanes Sharpied on a weather map. This is an era of lies as policy, where government priorities are based on right-wing conspiracy theories and fear-mongering."

A mother of 8 was deported within 24 hours of reporting sexual harassment by an ICE contracto She was following the rules & going through the process to get her green card Someone working on behalf of ICE abused her. She spoke out and was kicked out of the country. It’s retaliation & it’s wrong

Mike Johnson: "If the president was a king, then the government would be open." (Trump yesterday said he no longer has a need for Congress.)

Sorry for being absent, I was on The Hunt for Ben Solo (2028)

I wish my body liked me

High as a fucking kite

wild how insane people are becoming about zohran mamdani. he has been focusing on the same affordability issues he’s been this whole time and the entire opposition to him has essentially been calling him a terrorist for the last week. god he needs to win, i need these evil losers to feel this

Rand Paul: "In the one instance you're killed on sight. On the other instance, if you're captured, we just say, 'Oh well, we're gonna send you back to your country.' It doesn't make any sense."

Me: come inside {insert fictional man of choice here} FMOC: *confused* but we're already indoors Me:

That's Canada's Ass #midnightsuns

Trump: "They cheated on a commercial. Ronald Reagan loved tariffs and they said he didn't. And I guess it was AI or something. They cheated badly. Canada got caught cheating on a commercial. Can you believe it?"

Reading my replies is a hate crime and I would rather you just kill me

Get so many Grindr notifications that I use my phone as a vibrator

If you had told me a couple of weeks ago I was going to spend 50% of my #midnightsuns playthrough worrying about Captain America's boobs and giggling every time Dr Strange came on my screen I would've called you a liar

I'd rather be gaming, or getting fucked

Remember to enjoy this ship before they give Zeb a wife in the Mandalorian movie

Porn parodies have the opportunity to do the funniest thing possible

I thought he died

"Man goes scorched earth on ICE agents kidnapping people in his hometown." Source: old.reddit.com/r/PublicFrea...

this is very satisfying to watch.

Googling naked men (for fun and profit)

This pec pic was popular on IG. I can kinda see why. One little detail, I love how the overhead light shines through my pectoral cleavage and make an inverted V shadow on my stomach. 😊 It was a good pec pump.

Leavitt: "I don't think we're seeing deescalation from the unhinged leader of Colombia right now, and I don't think the president frankly is interested in that at this point."

Notbing has ever gone my way but I still. Manage to have a Good Time.

The Ben Solo movie getting cancelled is such a waste cause they could've finally paid off on that necklace of fertility

I need to drink directly from the source

Breaking: The Supreme Court is now officially considering taking up a case overturning same-sex marriage. This is the first time in history the court has considered rolling back this right.

What keeps New Yorkers up at night are not the right-wing fever dreams of Andrew Cuomo. It's whether or not they can keep living in the city they love. I'm the only candidate on stage tonight with a vision for the future and a plan to bring down costs.

You're telling me lucasfilm cancelled a project without announcing it first?

I had this weird semi-hippie idea that techbros were going to save us all. Good lord, did I get that one wrong.

#midnightsuns is amazing

For folks asking if they've made it *inside* a Home Depot yet as the business has clearly just continued letting agents do whatever they want in their lots, the answer is yes. This is from yesterday in Evanston.

Q: How comfortable are you w/Trump seeking $230m from the DOJ? MIKE JOHNSON: Uh, I don't know the details. I just read it. I know he believes he's owed that reimbursement. What I heard is that if receives it, he's gonna consider giving it to charity. They attack him for everything. *changes topic*

predictably, the GOP-controlled Congress is totally fine with Trump ordering the government to personally pay him hundreds of millions of dollars and are defending it by suggesting that he might consider donating some of it to charity. Possibly.

Can someone tell my job to cool it 😭