President is currently watching xXx: State of the Union (2005) to prepare for tonight.

Rotoscoping is a punchline now, have you heard the news.

It’s one Board of Peace, Michael. What could it cost? Ten billion dollars?

AI will only be worth it if it can figure out how to design a slipper that doesn't untie itself every 5 minutes

Cheese Doodles look like a wang, Cheese Balls self explanatory…when are they gonna make a puffed cheese snack for straight men

In the French Quarter, his name means Shia The Beef.

Right now cable TV & streaming execs are forming a fight club and the champion wins the right to produce a true crime mini-series about the Nancy Guthrie case

Please Help, VHS is Obsolete, Share this on Reddit so I can Kill Again www.hwoodtimes.com/scoops/please-help-vhs-is-obsolete-share-this-on-reddit-so-i-can-kill-again

Who is this Smiling Friend? Can someone ask Zach

hey, i created, directed, and showran this

Legally I have to call this satire

I was in 4th grade when Nipplegate happened. The kids will be fine.

Bawitdaba and so on and so forth

Ed and Edd Reunite After 25 Years for Eddy’s Funeral www.hwoodtimes.com/scoops/ed-an...

What had happened was Sandler handed Schneider an iPad with Procreate on it to try and keep him out of trouble for a few days.

If A$AP Rocky worked in an office he’d go by At Your Earliest Convenience Rocky.

Turning Point USA should release a comprehensive guide on how to change HDMI inputs & find the YouTube app if they want their 'alternative half-time show' to succeed.

Unfortunate new scoop I just acquired for @hwoodtimes.com - I really hope his producers let him eat all the McDonald's Hamburgers and chocolate he wants before he goes out.

You know the word

Who's gonna tell him

Desperate for a Twitter video of OJ Simpson on a golf course giving his opinion on the Football Hall of Fame snubbing Bill Belichick

@nationalgrid.bsky.social if you're not Spotify I don't want this

I’ll never be this clever

I’ve now received three separate comments indicating that my Dilbert comic was how they found out Scott Adams died. I know not the power of the pen I wield.

ONE EIGHT SEVEN

here's this vintage jeopardy clip with ken jennings

Jackass 5 but it's just a documentary about the guys doing their art show

I know I’m on the right path because my videos have started getting comments like this:

Am I two thousand and late

Overdraft fees being redistributed from one group of poors to other poors? Get the CEO of Wells Fargo in office immediately!

Austin Powers impersonator pays tribute to Rob Reiner and I managed to screenshot at 69 likes. What a world we live in.

I don't know about you guys but I'm starting to think this Woody Allen fella might be a bit of a creep

It’s every little girl’s dream to leverage their ska career into a Scotch Tape synergy song

Live look at notable ghoul & current Secretary of Education, Linda McMahon

head like a crusty maltese dog belly

Ain’t no coincidence that the mayor is a hog

Imagine how stupid heirlooms are going to be 50 years from now. Gee Grandma, thanks for the Martha Stewart and Snoop Dogg elves on the shelf. I'll definitely use these.

Crash be jorkin it crazy style

Just got confirmation that Mariah Carey has pre-ordered this for every system

Thank you for your attention to this matter!! #comic #trump

(out of breath) Hey sorry I need to call out sick today my pacemaker is being affected by the Cloudflare outage

This was a recession indicator.

Maybe they could’ve built Rome in a day if those idiots had the RYOBI™️ ONE+ tool system.

Stranger Things.

Louvre? I hardly know her.

He did WHAT?? I’ve already had two slices!

I don’t think it’s fair that I have to keep telling my mom the videos she watches are fake just because some guy without a creative spark can feel like he contributed something to internet culture

Rob Zombie made an A24 film before anyone knew what that was