things are going swimmingly in tomodachi life

lord help me I'm back on my bullshit (feeding french fries to seagulls outside the costco)

having severe PMS symptoms and being a first grade teacher are a fucking brutal combo.

my main goal in tomodachi life now is to get Mulder and Scully to fall in love and have a baby, and then to edit the mii of the baby so it looks like a little green alien

sometimes you eat something and you think that humans have created something too decadent, to the degree that we deserve to be punished for our sins or cursed on a cosmic level. the costco vanilla/chocolate swirl caramel brownie sundae is one of those things.

how many chrome tabs do you think i have open on my phone right now?

shes trying to do dark maga lmao

imposter syndrome will really make you believe youre shit at something you HAVE A MASTERS DEGREE IN huh

christian: let's fend for ourselves for dinner tonight me: three hash browns and a ginger ale it is for me then

praxis

as soon as he dies im gonna throw a huge party.

the children were absolute terrors today, im on day 3 of antibiotics for strep throat, time to *checks notes* buy a bunch of snacks at the gas station and go to an exclusive 16mm screening of reefer madness.

these children are so gross I think they gave me strep throat im going to cryyyy

the caramel churro cold brew at tim horton's tastes like a candle, just so y'all know. do NOT recommend

I love to be so tired and wake up too early and not be able to go back to sleep, its so awesome

Just to give a sense of the insane scale of billions of dollars…MacKenzie Scott got about $38 billion after divorcing Bezos in 2019. She has become the world’s most generous philanthropist, giving away over $19 billion…and she’s currently wealthier than she started. Just. Tax. Them.

I filed our canadian taxes, please clap.

Happy Appomattox Day to all that celebrate

I’ve been thinking about this guy almost daily for ten fucking years. essentially my entire 30’s. when he finally croaks I imagine I’ll let out a sigh so deep it realigns my fucking spine

I got this once-a-day sudoku puzzle book for christmas and today I realized you can tell how hard the puzzle is by how much the pencil is cumming 🥵

listening to the wet day episode of @cbbworld.bsky.social in the shower, as poseidon intended 🙏

things about me that are 50/50 either cute & whimsical or indicative of underlying ocd: i always like to try to pick a color of chip clip to match the bag of chips im clipping, if possible.

what's something you know you have enough of but also will never stop buying? for me i think its black t shirts.

The 30 Rockification of real life is nearing completion

SEAN EVANS: As you tackle the fires of Da Bomb, a two-part question as a Chicagoan and a Pope: one, who wins a best-of-7 between the '05 White Sox and '16 Cubs, and two, as part of the Nostra Aetate dogma of Vatican II-- THE POPE: (coughing) fuck! SEAN EVANS: careful around your eyes Your Holiness

they called for a snow day today and I stood in the kitchen in my pajamas at 6am and triple-checked my email and the school website to make sure it wasn't an april fools joke before going back to bed

I should not be allowed to go to the grocery on my way home from school lmao

Don't believe me? Well, here it is! (Keep Kool Cinema in St. John's is cool as hell.)

You KNOW I'm at the Friday night 16mm screening of Salty (1973) starting Clint Howard!

I hate when you bite your cheek and then that part of your cheek gets swollen so then you just keep biting that part of your cheek over and over and it only gets worse

I taught 5th grade for 3 weeks no problem. I taught 1st grade for 1 week and I got sick. kids are DISGUSTING lol

*sigh* I should call her

after being in grad school for 2 years and working retail part time, can I just say it's so nice to have a real job and make real money and have the weekends off to get to just do whatever I want and hang out with my husband

there's only one good streamer and he's a bald 37 year old from vancouver

trying to wrangle/teach/entertain 20 six-year-olds on three hours of sleep and after a 12-hour day yesterday is......certainly something to try to do.

I ate fast food twice today dont judge me

clicking the huge button that says "review scams" seems like just the way for a scammer to get me 🧐

I got a permanent teaching job for the rest of the school year (not substituting), teaching 1st grade. today's my first day!!!

school was canceled today and I have done basically nothing besides sleep and eat junk food.

I think i finally cracked the code of the long commute: iced coffee & a funny podcast in the morning; fizzy drink & music-so-loud-i-can-hardly-think in the afternoon.

they stole an hour from women

it's not fair that my precious weekend is one hour shorter, but I think I made up for it by having such a great day today 💙

mini pot de goo

one (1) week back in the classroom and ive seamlessly transitioned right back into being a certified Bag Lady

Good morning! Yes, this is he