I just remembered beepers! Holy moly, I feel old.

One fun thing about being old enough to have been around for the launch of Gmail is that sometimes, when you're searching your inbox for something unrelated, you find some heinously embarrassing fan mail that you wrote when you were 14 and have to take the rest of the morning to recover

@vandoliers.bsky.social #VFFV

Happy 10th anniversary the record that started it all! #vffv

Modern Christian Worship Music is basically using $5k instruments to play terrible songs.

In Pflugerville, P Terry’s is just pronounced “Terry’s”

There were more people IN the parade than AT it.

This series is wild! Go Oilers!

LETS GO!!!

THE EDMONTON OILERS HAVE MADE IT BACK TO THE STANLEY CUP FINAL 🏆

I hope Dan Patrick gets stuck behind lotto scratcher traders every time he goes to a convenience store forever.

Let’s go Oil!

Bruce Springsteen is bringing back Rock n Roll, I believe. Not just the music, but that spirit.

Living in a shithole town (Thorndale, TX), you can’t imagine how terrible our post office is.

I've got some music out, in case anybody gives a shit: open.spotify.com/artist/7hqTD...

Translator when the Pope switched to Latin

What’s the reverse of Imposter Syndrome? I feel like I should be doing bigger things.

Girl, you got me falling like the Stock Market 😍

My favorite pastime is plotting on ways to sabotage my neighbor’s garden but never actually doing it. (He trapped and “relocated” our cat to the country last year)

Today is Transgender Day of Visibility and I’m so thankful for the handful of Trans friends who have come into my life. I will always work to be safe, and to create safe spaces. Love you all. 🏳️‍⚧️

I can’t find the baseball

Y’all look prettier every day.

I just quit my job!!!!

A little snippet from a demo I recorded today. #songwriter

¡Órale!

Is the rabbit at the dog track race baiting?

Is “ground” really a better term than “land floor”?

I just submitted for a music group’s grant program. Doubt I’ll get it, but they sent the nicest rejection letter I’ve ever gotten last year.

If you had Audie slipping in the shower, getting wrapped up in his shower curtain, and falling backwards and hitting his head on the side of the toilet on your bingo card…you may now mark that box.

What the hell is going on? I support Ukraine. 💯

I stand with Ukraine.

The Empire needs to strike back. Soon please.

Sorry I’ve been neglecting you BlueSky. I just don’t get as many notifications here so I forget about it. Y’all keep blowing me up so I remember. Also, I have a new single out this Friday. Share if you’re adding it to your playlist!

Here is my Federal Employment Termination story:

From this day forward, it shall be known as Lake MoPac

I’m rooting for Taylor #superbowl

1,000% tariff on people telling me about their dream last night.

That Gaga videomercial for Mastercard felt like when U2 released that album on everyone’s phone #grammys

Tough night for the country music police #cowboycarter #grammys

Writing songs to fight against the oppression of people who aren’t like me. The truth is, we’re more alike than not.

I’m the self-appointed President of Slim Thug Bluesky.

Remember: 1) keep your wrist straight, and 2) punch *through* the face.

FDT

I genuinely enjoy this aspect of my job.

It’s gonna wind up the Gulf of Texaco after they open up a naming rights bidding war.